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sorry garfield
but truth is I've never considered the C word as a swear word :oops:
lol
angel your right this does sound familiar lol
just go and get a life IAAMS
nobody in this forum is willing to waste their time on immature, confused and sad people who use their time to try and irritate other people...hint hint
Lets try and stick to the topic people.
Less cussin more debating.
Back in BLACK
Yes that is what I was gone to say,
"Purity is half of faith.......Prayer is the light...patience is illumination; and the Quran is an argument for or against you. Everyone starts his day and is a vendor of his soul, either freeing it or bringing about its ruin." Muslim
back to the topic iaams...
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
Salam
They dont see it as a big deal.
They say: "At least we are not killing anybody."
Dating is not that bad for them.
Giving girls a bit of pleasure is something that they believe God will overlook.
Omrow
Even if its haraam pleasure?
And what makes them think God will overlook it?
Back in BLACK
I agree.
Today, the seriousness of sins has been downplayed, almost everything is seen as being "minor"
This is because many have a tendency to self-justify their actions by comparing sins with other sins.
Some look at the extreme actions of other Muslims such as fornication or adultery and compare them to their own.....That way dating seems trivial in comparison.
We should realise that a sin’s a sin, which all bring about the wrath and punishment of Allah (swt).
their arrognace or their dumbness
Using the word dumb sounds, well dumb. Use stupidity instead. Its also more politically correct. (being dumb is a disability).
Its not a choice: 'hmmm... lets see, shall I kill someone, or shall I go on a date?'
Its not an either or situation, so it not a valid excuse.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
I initially used the word stupid but changed it cos I thought the word Dumb sounded better
my choice
Dumb is a disaility but this word is also used for people who are slow/stupid
even Quran refers to people who are deaf, dumb and blind yet we all know God is not talking about their physical disabilties
btw people who date ARE dumb as as u would like to say "Stupid"
deleted
Salaam
I don’t believe that marriage is always the answer.
When I was in college a friend of mine was involved with this guy who had absolutely nothing going for him…he had a bad character, was involved in a lot of dodgy stuff, he wasn’t working/studying, he messed her about and was extremely immature.
Thankfully, my friend finally saw him for what he was and finished it.
I wouldn’t say that marriage is the answer for that boy; he seriously needs to sort himself out first before he can even think about marriage.
Just because someone reaches a certain age and have physical needs to be met this does not necessarily mean that they should get married.
They need to be of the right frame of mind first and mature enough to take it seriously….otherwise they’re just going to mess someone else’s life up.
If anything, his parents should stress more so on deen. And sort his frame of mind out.
Marriage also isnt the answer for many of the 14/15 years olds who are involved in the dating game either.
Of course, this also doesn’t mean that marriage should be prolonged for ages either.
Wasalaam
yeh this is one of the biggest mistakes that parents make...i mean there are some people that are at uni and they would like to get married but because their parents think that it isnt the right time yet (in other words get degree 1st!) then these people start the dating game...and in some cases marriage might not be the answer like muslimsister said but it does protect you from a lot of problems esp. while studying.
Its not as easy as that.
Theres no point in getting some1 hitched if they can't financially support they're partner and lets face it not many girls are gonna be too chuffed to live with (as well as live-off) the inlaws.
Which is why parents say get a degree first, after which a job will follow by which a means to support yourself as well as your partner.
People just need to learn self control.
Back in BLACK
deleted
marriage may not have been the answer for the immature guy, but what about ur friend?
i agree with yashmaki's views on this issue...
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
That's my excuse, but now I'm not to sure I want to do a PHD.
my sisters mate getting married v soon
the boy is a lost cause though-i dont think he should EVER get married
money plays a part but its more important to be mature enough to handle marrige
and just cos some are mature enough to do haraam stuff-that dont mean theu're mature enough to get married
Salaam
My friend shaped up, regrets the past and is getting married.
I think that one needs to be in the right frame of mind before they get married.
If in college her parents had given in to her request to marry that wannabe G, she’d probably be divorced by now…
One becomes physically mature in their early teens but mental maturity takes a bit longer to kick in…
People shouldn’t jump into marriage unless they are mature enough to handle the responsibility.
Wasalaam
Yes, I agree
Marriage is a major thing and you can't play with marriage and jump to conclusions and a wife/husband should be chosen carefully.
"Purity is half of faith.......Prayer is the light...patience is illumination; and the Quran is an argument for or against you. Everyone starts his day and is a vendor of his soul, either freeing it or bringing about its ruin." Muslim
deleted
Lol-What makes you think that?
Just because I’m anti early marriage for two immature people who can not handle responsibility, this does not mean that I’m all for dating.
Dating is strictly forbidden, and marriage for someone too immature to handle the responsibility is a recipe for disaster.
I agree with muslim sis on this one, if the guy aint mentally ready and is likely to mess, its best to hold up in the marriage issue, its best if he gets his act together, also when a guy doesnt want to get married and hasnt prepared himself mentally, marriage will be a huge step and he mite just not give 100% into the marriage or try to which will cause many problems in the long run..
If a guys not ready for marriage ... he's not ready.
Theres no two ways about it. Theres a huge difference between what a guy expects of a g/f and what he expects of a wife and what they would expect of him. So you cant say that if he's ready to date than he should be ready to marry.
Both the guy and the girl have to be ready for the responsibilities of marriage, its not something to be taken lightly as you will be (or SHOULD BE IMO) be spending the rest of your lives togeather. So they both must be sure that they are ready for such a responsiblity.
Back in BLACK
I thought id go dig this old thread out.
Since I was chatting to a friend of mine who said something i'd like to here what you guys think:
Basic scenario is he's dropped outta studies and doing call center jobs for just over a year now. And his parents are banging on at him to either go back to studies (which he doesnt wanna do) or get a decent job (which he cant really do without some decent qualifications) so basicly he's in a muddle at the moment.
... which is not kool ..i know) to which he said i dont wanna marry someone i dont know, id rather get to know them first.
Anywayz, his parents said to him that he's got one year to get his act togeather coz if he hasnt decided by then what he wants to do they're just gonna marry him off as they wanna "fullfill their obligations" he was telling me this (and i was laughing
Obviously i went thru the whole thats dating and it aint allowed routine... but he seems to be too unsure. I think thats the worst thing really when you're stuck in this phase of uncertainty.
I dont think its right for his parents to force marriage onto him especially at this time when he doesnt know if he's coming or going, but then again i can see where they're coming from wanting to fullfill their farz.
How much are we allowed to know about a potential spouse? Without meeting them?
Back in BLACK
Enough to know if you want to marry them but aslong as everything is done in a halal way.
Aslong as everything is done in the correct manner and if they have permission from their parents time doesnt matter.
[color=magenta]hmmmmmm interesting topic, we were having a discussion with this chinese guy he was telling us all his indian friends were against the idea of arranged marriages during their teenage years but whn they came in to their 20's slowly their parents strted to introduce them to potential hubbies/wifeys n the more guys/girls they bought along the more thye agreeed with it because now thy were way past the stage where they would want to marry someone because they were "fit" and knew they wanted the whole packag like personality etc and he was like he thnks arranged marriage are fantastic because obviously ur parents will look for the whole package n whether this person is compatiable for you.
obviously your friend has the issue with gettting to knw the person n that is totally natural cuz he is expected to live with this person for his whole life so it is important that he finds someone suitable with the same ideas etc as him,but he will have to follow the islamic guidelines and he can do it thru the parents our parents want us to be happy [/color]
[b][color=DeepPink]O you who believe, If you help (in the cause of) Allah, He will help you, and make your foothold firm[/color][color=DeepSkyBlue] {Surah Muhammad7}[/color][/b]
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