"Naz" wrote:

If on the other hand you cant have kids what is so wrong with adopting? These so called "Muslims" really need to stop practising culture and start paying more attention to religion. I feel sorry for such ppl.

Adopting children is not obligatory so one can adopt if they choose to do so. Why force it upon them?

just a technical point i studied in fiqh...islam only allows us to foster a child and not adopt it. the difference being that when you foster a child you can bring them up as your own and keep them for ever but you cannot give them your name (family name). with adoption the child gets your name too so if the childs surname is green and yours is smith then when you adopt the child they will become smith too. the reasons are many e.g. the child has the right to know their true parentage and even though they may live with you all their lives they cannot inherit your money/property.

I dont think that all Muslims that dont adopt is due to 'culture' issues.

I know a couple who cant have kids and havent adopted and its def not cos of 'culture' issues - they're not very much into culture and care little of what others think.

"Dr Who" wrote:

just a technical point i studied in fiqh...islam only allows us to foster a child and not adopt it. the difference being that when you foster a child you can bring them up as your own and keep them for ever but you cannot give them your name (family name). with adoption the child gets your name too so if the childs surname is green and yours is smith then when you adopt the child they will become smith too. the reasons are many e.g. the child has the right to know their true parentage and even though they may live with you all their lives they cannot inherit your money/property.

thats true but in Britain if you want a child permanently and not only as a temporary measure such as fostering then in law you will need to legally adopt a child. in Islam the child will always belong to its birth parents and the adopter is always technically 'only looking after' the child. the child can never belong to the adopted parent.

the adoption process can take several years from the initial interview to the final court date.

the child is almost always damaged in some way and special training and care is needed to look after them.

the child must be told from the very begining about the adoption, birth parents etc in age appropriate language - nothing must be hidden from them - and they must be told the truth from the very start.

they have the choice at 18 to see the birth parents and indeed to do as they wish as all adults.

it can be very rewarding, very taxing, a lifetime of hard work.

it is a choice and a privilege and unless you have experienced it, you cant really imagine it.