u trust people over time, these days evryone has some kinda hidden agenda

but is fascinating how well people can pull the wool over ur eyes

i aint even a naive person - but even i get shocked when i REALLY find out what people are like

its always shocking to find out that a person has done time, is/was a wife beater, is a wominiser, mother likes to break up her childrens marraiges, boy isnt really religious but is a ladies man or someone has mental problems

when they've made out to be perfectly lovely, nice people :shock:

"MuslimSister" wrote:

-I've learnt that some mums are evil enough to break up their own childrens marraiges.

you learnt that so late!? :shock:

I knew that when I was a kid, i knew so many parents like that I found it normal, and i still do.

Quote:

i aint even a naive person - but even i get shocked when i REALLY find out what people are like

nothing and I mean NOTHING ever surprises me to how cruel people can be, there's simply no limit for some people :evil: .

Quote:

but is fascinating how well people can pull the wool over ur eyes

not really, some people are just better at lying then others.

Quote:

when they've made out to be perfectly lovely, nice people :shock:

MOST people do that, my mum has told me to put an act on because I am a bit too blunt for her liking, i hate to put on an image that is not there.

My dad said people in Pakistan (especially family members back home) are experts on this subject, i dunno why

EDITED BY ADMIN

How bad do parents have to be to actively try to ruin their kids' lives?

"Admin" wrote:

How bad do parents have to be to actively try to ruin their kids' lives?

I doubt it has much to do with upsetting them/ruining thier life.

its a weird mentality.

But i have sussed the weirdos out.(sort ov)

here's my theory:

if they find out that thier daughter/son in-law does not conform to [i]their[/i] standards of being suitable for their darling child, they will go out of their way to wreck the marriage.

Firstly the criteria such people set for their son/daughter in-law is unrealistic, anything less then perfection is NOT tolerated. i.e. I remember one guy saying his parents wanted him to divorce his wife because she did not clean a certain part of the house.

Anyways to wreck marriage mother/father in law will resort to the following:

- refusing to see grandchildren
- childish name calling, which is often blown out of proportion
- make nasty rumors up about son/daughter in-law
- actively looking for a new son/daughter in-law even though their child is already married with children
- shunning son/daughter until they divorce
- emotionally blackmailing them by claiming Paradise lies in the feet of their mother
- installing guilt i.e. "I have done so much for you and you are so ungrateful, your wife/husband is ruining my life, so get rid of him/her"

Quote:

its always shocking to find out that a person has done time, is/was a wife beater, is a wominiser, mother likes to break up her childrens marraiges, boy isnt really religious but is a ladies man or someone has mental problems

I know some men that lead a "double life", have a family with Paki wife and one with a gory, and neither woman find out about each other.

And it’s not uncommon for the in-laws to STEAL the money women have inherited from deceased relatives.

Welcome to the real world…

:shock:

u know everything

i shud book u for some life lessons for my sister - she always finds out crap the hard way

"MuslimSister" wrote:

"Admin" wrote:

EDITED BY ADMIN

How bad do parents have to be to actively try to ruin their kids' lives?

I just finished reading an autobiography of a guy named Dave…his mum used to beat him, stab him, make him eat his own crap and vomit, she’d make him run around with nothing on in freezing weather, refuse him food and make him sleep on the floor in the garage…..the boy grew up with a speech impediment cos his mum made him swallow ammonia, a bad posture, trust, commitment issues and an inability to socialise with people in society…

[color=indigo][b]I've read that book and it's so sad
His mother was a pure evil cow with no heart.[/b][/color]

That's incredibly depressing...

"Don Karnage" wrote:

That's incredibly depressing...

but not soo depressing to make you don a cape and fight crime at night while being a mild mannered student during the day?

"zxz" wrote:

"Admin" wrote:

How bad do parents have to be to actively try to ruin their kids' lives?

I doubt it has much to do with upsetting them/ruining thier life.

I know of a case or two where that was precisely the case.
They wanted the marriage ruined so that they could take care of the grandkids!

"Seraphim" wrote:

"Don Karnage" wrote:

That's incredibly depressing...

but not soo depressing to make you don a cape and fight crime at night while being a mild mannered student during the day?

Almost that depressing

Today I learned you're never too old for a snow day! I drove about 30 yards out of my driveway, turned right around, and just chillaxed for the whole of the day.

We watched Casablanca... in the middle of the day!

Hurray for irresponsibility!

you should be grateful your mum isn't one of the embarrasing second-types like mine is!!

atleast she's not in the 1st group you metioned, alhamduilillah!

"MuslimSister" wrote:

Today I learnt..

-Just how thick I am when it comes to Maths, I spent all week revising for a maths exam only to fail it today by one stupid, measly, lamo mark.

-Muslims encounter two types of non Muslims. One type will make it clear how much they hate the extreme, crazy fanatical Muslims and will make it clear that “our sort” is not wanted in this country…..the second type will go to great lengths to prove that not all non Muslims share such radical views and will go out of their way to declare their great love for the “Mozlems” and will point out how many similarities they share, how “peaceful the Mozlems are” and how vast their knowledge is of the religion of the “Islam’s”….really loudly in front of all onlookers.

Today, I encountered the (embarrassing) second type.

I've often wondered what muslims think of suckup non-muslims. It seems a bit disengenous to learn nothing about the religion except some cursory talking points from the news, and run around making grand declarations.

The ones that really turn my skin are the intellectual brand of the second type you mentioned - their motivation is only to sound smart so they deliberately pronounce things in an exotic way "Mooosleems" "Gee-Hawd" "Izlaaaaam" etc,. - You know, the type that greet muslims with "Salam" without considering there may be a reason most muslims don't return it. They were so in vogue a couple years ago I got a little disoriented and had to open up a thread asking how the hell you actually pronounce this stuff because they were so insistant this is the right way.

I find them all a little embarassing, especially when they run around apologizing to all muslims on "our" behalf for various things you really can't peg on all non-muslims. Like [url=http://crescentandcross.com/index.php?page=articles&author=joanna_franci..., I have no idea where the desire for self flagellation comes from but it is a little bit irritating being stereotyped by somebody from your same group. It's like a non-muslim Uncle Tom!

"MuslimSister" wrote:

Whilst I find their declarations of love totally unnecessary and incredibly embarrassing, it’s obvious that they have good intentions. I find their antics endearing.

The person I encountered on the bus today was an elderly Jewish guy. Had he just smiled at me, that would have been more than enough, however he obviously disagreed.

[b]Why is it embarrassing for you?[/b] It’s not very day that people have the guts to loudly offer their apologies and warmly welcome you into “their country”….even though it is totally unnecessary.

He made my day.

Maybe this is a guy thing but to me apologies mean responsibility for something,.

So when we have folks running around apologizing to Muslims on behalf of Christianity/the West/non-Muslims for clubbing, partying, racism against muslims, et cetera it is like saying "We caused this." When in reality I don't think we did - and in the above circumstances I am often just as put off or mobilized against these kinds of subcultures as muslims.

Why should people be running around perpetuating the erroneous belief that just because I am different from Muslims, I am somehow responsible for the over indulgences of the godless? Whose impact on society I lament just as much as muslims?

It really does bother me because it's so easily exploited to perpetuate those kinds of stereotypes of non-Muslims.

Of course that's just how I view it, I guess if I didn't connect apologies with responsibility then I would just dismiss it as somebody introducing themself in a somewhat ingratiating way... but then what would an apology be than just a detached nicety of politeness with no weight behind it...

I learnt i hate Central London and the people that work there...

Plus some people who are 'users and abusers' should get whats coming to them.

"Seraphim" wrote:

I learnt i hate Central London and the people that work there...

.

7/8 million people live in london

1.5 million people live in central london - but cos of the job opportunities about 1 million commuters visit/work there daily

did u meet and hate all of them in the few hours u were there? :roll:

"MuslimSisLilSis" wrote:

"Seraphim" wrote:

I learnt i hate Central London and the people that work there...

.

7/8 million people live in london

1.5 million people live in central london - but cos of the job opportunities about 1 million commuters visit/work there daily

did u meet and hate all of them in the few hours u were there? :roll:

Damn right....

mm i kinder agree with seraphim. i liked it for the shopping and cosmopolitan feel but other than that what struck me immediately was ppl were i duno in an hypnotic state. they didn't even make eye contact. they were like robots programmed to walk and talk only to those who could "show them the money". don't bother asking londoners for directions they;ll tell u to fob off or just ignore u. They appeared so rude and everything about the place screamed money money money. This is all my cousins seem to speak of i mean the ones from london, material stuff. im sure [b]all londoners aren't like this,[/b] but sadly all the ones ive met are obsessed with money and designer labels and keepin up with the jones'

Well i did notice the increase in dirt, pollution etc but i suppose that's to be expected in big cities not just london.

"yashmaki" wrote:

mm i kinder agree with seraphim. i liked it for the shopping and cosmopolitan feel but other than that what struck me immediately was ppl were i duno in an hypnotic state. they didn't even make eye contact. they were like robots programmed to walk and talk only to those who could "show them the money". don't bother asking londoners for directions they;ll tell u to fob off or just ignore u. They appeared so rude and everything about the place screamed money money money. This is all my cousins seem to speak of i mean the ones from london, material stuff. im sure [b]all londoners aren't like this,[/b] but sadly all the ones ive met are obsessed with money and designer labels and keepin up with the jones'

Well i did notice the increase in dirt, pollution etc but i suppose that's to be expected in big cities not just london.

exactly... thats the exact feeling i got for being there for a single day.

I held out a door for this woman and she looked at me funny simply coz i was trying to be nice... the shop keeper didnt really look at me just muttered the price... but i didnt pay him until he looked at me. :twisted:

They just seem to be all wrapped up in their own little worlds to care about anyone else. I have no idea how such a society can function.

"yashmaki" wrote:

. im sure [b]all londoners aren't like this,[/b] but .

thank you Yash for pointing out the obvious of not generalising based on a few hours of experience :roll:

i've lived in london all my life - i visit central london on a reg basis

i've never ever encountered people NOT willing to help/give directions etc

i agree that central londoners may be a lot more materialistic

but thats only cos they're earning big bucks

u get bear money working in central - even if its just in retail

london: best city in the world bar NONE!

only place where you can meet people from every corner of the globe all squashed into one place. on moment your in Little Venice, next your in Little Arabia. at the moment im living in a mixture of Poland and Australia, 1/2 a mile away from Jamaica on my right, and 1/2 a mile away from Pakistan on my left. why live anywhere else????

the reason the are weird red machines at bus stops is to ripoff tourists. Londoners have Oyster Cards which are SOOOO conveniant.

the reason there are no bins is because of the IRA in the 80s and now everyone's used to keeping their litter with them until they get home (or chucking on the street unfortunately...) But thats ok cos one of the people who gets the shade of Allah on the Day of Judgement is someone who removes an obstacle from the road that might get in the way of a Muslim. So we have hundreds of opportunities per day to remove little objects from the road and earn Allah's shade insha'Allah!!

Im very sorry to say to everyone whos not priveleged to live in 'the best city in he world bar NONE', but although i am never proud to say im British, im always proud to say im Muslim, and always proud to say im from London!

ur right tho, it does need a bit of a clean.....

its not the best city in the world . it's prob the only city in the world where a bricked boxed room with no garden costs more than a 3 bedroom house with a spacious front and back garden. It's good for job opportunities and making big bucks if u can get ur foot in, but it's extortionate to live there, i think ppl make it a greater struggle for themsevles and their kids living in london..debt debt debt. :shock:

whilst its true that houses are a lot more expensive here

ppl also earn a lot more in london then they do up north

so extra wages is cos the house costs and the general cost of living is so high

i love london

not cos of the above reasons but cos its the most multicultural city in the UK

270 different nationalities are present in london - like Yaqub said, you get a little bit of every country in this city

and who else can boast of 2million muslims living in their city? who happen to be from every corner of the globe

its a lot more tolerent for Islamic issues too

my family shifted from B'ham to London

only cos dad got a better job/house etc here

"Noor" wrote:

"MuslimSister" wrote:

"Admin" wrote:

EDITED BY ADMIN

How bad do parents have to be to actively try to ruin their kids' lives?

I just finished reading an autobiography of a guy named Dave…his mum used to beat him, stab him, make him eat his own crap and vomit, she’d make him run around with nothing on in freezing weather, refuse him food and make him sleep on the floor in the garage…..the boy grew up with a speech impediment cos his mum made him swallow ammonia, a bad posture, trust, commitment issues and an inability to socialise with people in society…

[color=indigo][b]I've read that book and it's so sad
His mother was a pure evil cow with no heart.[/b][/color]

I don't think she was evil. I felt sorry for her eventually. She failed to achieve what she wanted in life, she became an alcoholic, she seems to have had issues with her own childhood so that initially she was really good with her kids, because she resented some of the treatment she recieved as a child. Somewhere cracks started to appear and eventually they joined up and her child ended up being on the recieving end.

i disagree

there is NO excuse for child abuse

Dave had the same upbringing as his mum

did he turn around and start to abuse his only son?

No he didnt

so just cos Daves mum was abused by her mum

that dont justify the inhumane way she treated her son