hey just a quick question if two people who would like to get married and are afraid that their parents will reject it i.e the other person is not right for their son/daughter or that their too young ,can they stil go forward and get 'secretly married'???
p.s whats the rulling on a guy getting his body hair trimmed down or waxed, to look good for his wife and a girl going to beauty salons and getting their hair cut and get certain treatments for their husbands?
confused would like to know....
Secret marriages are a big no no. Afterall you DO need witnesses.
Also it will casue complications down the line.
How do you know the parent will not allow it without asking?
To me secret marriages are like having an affair. You want some action, but without the sin. If things get complicaed you have a 'secret' divorce and be on your merry.
It is cowardice.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
As for getting "body hair trimmed down".
I'm assuming you are talking about pubic hair. One is required to keep it short as it is a religious sin not to do so. Shaving, trimming, waxing, using hair removable creams are all acceptable ways of removing pubic hair, unless harm is feared.
Bhy body hair I assume getting it all removed. legs, chest, back, arms...
no idea about that.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
no i mean there will be witnesses and that, plus i mean like removing body hair like chest,leg etc?
[b][color=indigo] [url=http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=12&ID=4641&CATE=10] Check out these links for more info.[/url]
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[b][color=indigo]Yes that’s permitted for a guy and as for a sister going to a beauty salon that’s permitted to as long as her awrah is covered in front of non-muslim women. [/color][/b]
Bro if you love the girl and you wanna marry her , you should marry her no matter what your parents think , but dont do it in secret tell your parents first
there is more barakah in a marriage which the parents are happy with, so they should be asked. having said that, according to Hanafi fiqh a girl can get married without her wali present (according to Shafi'i fiqh this is not allowed).
but everything possible should be tried out first. a friend of mine was engaged to this guy but their parents didn't want them getting married till they finish their degrees. and they didn't want to be sinning everytime they chatted to eachother informally (it never went beyond that because they're both from practising muslim families). so they took two friends as witnesses and did the nikaah. this is known as a 'khufya nikaah' because it is assumed that you will do another big one in the open, invite all the family etc etc.
in such cases i don't see anything wrong with it because its not like they were going to start secretly living together, they just wanted to make their conversations halaal, they had the right intention. but if you're actually planning on secretly living together, as admin said things will only get more complicated down the road so it's a better idea to DO ISTIKHARA (so u know your own decision is right in the first place!) and then inform the parents straight away.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
I personally wouldn't do it in secret once u get married no amount of grovelling will help you to recover the sense of trust and strong bond you had with your parents, even if they forgive u things will never be the same again. If you're willing to lose that then i suppose you could go ahead.
On the otherhand i dont support parent who knowingly allow their children to sin by refusing to give their approval for a marriage.
i know this girl who wanted to get married to this boy she met but the parents wouldnt allow it and her brothers beat up the guy so he stopped seeing her , then she went pakistan and get married to a relative , which unfortunately ended in a messy divorce and now her family dont talk to her
you cant help thinking all that could have been avoided if she married the person she was going out with
im not advocating dating or going out with boys/girls cuz islamically thats wrong and your sinning, but sometimes commonsense should prevail , cuz i jus think about that news story where the guy was murdered by his girls brothers and both brothers and father went jail :shock:
Quote from the article:
WHAT DOES ISLAM SAY ABOUT FORCED/ARRANGED/LOVE MARRIAGE? WHAT DOES ISLAM SAY ABOUT SECRET MARRIAGES?
By Shaykh Salim Ghisa
[b]
Secret Marriages[/b]