Salaam
Imam Bukhari was so pious that he could truthfully say “I have never told a lie”.
Some people are compulsive liars, some people never lie, and others might throw in a white lie every now and again…
In what situations (if any) is it OK to lie? Some claim that there are no “permissible lies”
Many converts have to hide their conversion from their parents….so one cant even imagine the amount of lying that must take place in such situations… in less extreme situations many born Muslims are forced to hide their Islamic activities from loved ones, would that be classified as sinful lying?
How easy or difficult is it for you to lie? Are you one of them (like me) who’d rather dodge/ignore or pretend to misunderstand a question so that you wouldn’t have to lie…?
What’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told someone?
Doesn’t a compulsive liar eventually lose all friends, trust and credibility?
Apparently when one lies a foul odour omits from them which causes the angels to run away from them..
Also, it is said that Allah’s curse is on the liars...
Please discuss.
Wasalaam
I used to think of myself as extremely truthful.
Brutal honesty. I thought it was onwe of the qualities I had. However recently I think that may have been a lie I told myself...
There are some situations where lies are acceptable. The two I can think of being to save your life and to unite a family.
dodging and ignoring questions on the other hand are legitimate ways of not lying IMO. At times its just too much hassle to be candid.
apart from that I do not think in the UK we need to lie at all. Unfortunately at time I have caught myself doing so though.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
it's permissible to lie to cover up one's sins, or someone else's. dodging the question is always better than outright lying ofcourse.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
I'm terrible at lying so I don't even try to fool ppl. Besides the few times I've tried my guilty conscience got the better of me, and I ended up admitting I was lying lol. You hear of kids stealing penny sweets in woolies pick n mix? If i ever did that i'd be at the counter confessing my guilt, then you'd see me on the news for theft lol.
So regardless of the religious rule I don't make it a point to lie, even if it's just for laughs. Most of my lying was done when I was a kid for pranks or to stay out a bit later than my curfew. Can't remember my biggest lie, i'm sure they were little ones, but that could be a lie in itself
i hate ppl who are perpetual liars, especially if it results in malicious gossip or harms someone.
Recently I have been covering up for mates coz it's concerning marriage proposals. If i'm asked if a certain sin she did was true or not i'd say well you'll have to ask her. But i rant on about her good points instead. Is that sinful? How can i say my mates done xyz she's a bad person. Aren't you suppose to cover the faults of your brothers and sisters in faith? Or am i suppose to be truthful and ruin the marriage proposal?
P.S isn't dodging the question a euphamism for lying. It's like saying "ask me no questions and i'll tell you no lies".
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
it is more than 'ok' to cover the sins of one who has repented and reformed themself. a person's sins are between them and Allah - if they have regretted those sins and asked Allah for forgiveness, who are we to judge?
plz note: i am not talking about someone who is still sinning unashamedly - when it comes to matters of marriage, if asked about such people who openly sin, we cannot cover for them.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
Haven't read all the bove posts, yet.
Just thinking, if I said Yes, I might not be lieing. Yet if I said no, I could be telling the truth.
Confused? No. Congratulations...you're thinking truthfully, right?
Gentleness and kindness were never a part of anything except that it made it beautiful, and harshness was never a part of anything except that it made it ugly.
Through cheating, stealing, and lying, one may get required results but finally one becomes
To lie... to be untruthful. I will occationally lie... obviously im not gonna lie for the heck of it, there usually a good reason. I dont think its a good idea to lie over little things... if its something really big... then lieing is an option if it will prevent harm. Its the lesser of the two evils... between you lieing and someone getting hurt.
Would it kill ya to lie? what are you running for saint hood?
To Lie or not to Lie... that is the question that preoccupies my people (thats you folk... except judda).
I prefer dodging the question.... or answering in such a way ... that what im saying is actually true but the listener wont believe me.
Ask about what?
For further info on my opionon on the truth and lies... read my signiture.
Back in BLACK
i was replying to something yash wrote - read the bit of her post which i quoted.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
Salaam
If a person has got up to all sorts in his/her past and then repented then one should cover their sins….however this is only applicable if people will not be hurt or placed at a disadvantage by this act.
For example, if one was promiscuous in their past and as a result caught HIV…then even if they’ve changed and repented then prospective suitors must be made aware of this fact…
If one had a secret marriage back in the day then even if they’ve changed and repented then prospective suitors have a right to know….I know of a marriage that broke up because the wife found out that her husband had previously been married with two kids.
If one is a recovering drug addict and as a result suffers from Cannabis induced Paranoia or whatever other health problem as a result of his/her past addiction…then even if they’ve changed, prospective suitors must be made aware of this fact.
The above are extreme example, however, the past does always come out and not everyone is as accepting of people’s pasts…that’s why I believe that it’s best to lay most the cards on the table….esp those cards that will affect other peoples lives.
Wasalaam
[color=magenta]where do you draw the line between lying n joking because often ppl are told somethng which isnt the truth just to make people laugh, whtz the difference between joking n lying?[/color]
[b][color=DeepPink]O you who believe, If you help (in the cause of) Allah, He will help you, and make your foothold firm[/color][color=DeepSkyBlue] {Surah Muhammad7}[/color][/b]
If nobody is expected to believe and much less to act on what is said or implied, then it is not a dangerous thing to say, and if it is funny it might be a joke.
Fiction is not deception because nobody is expected to believe it. Where people are expected to act on it, it is powerful fiction and that bit more dangerous, and lies might be implied such as the church alleges of The Da Vinci Code. On that note I would call fiction that props up conspiracy theories irresponsible, just as a joke that implies lies about anyone is an irresponsible joke.
So the complete answer is: if it is deliberately made clear before any reaction is possible that what is being said is untrue, such as by following the format of a joke ("knock, knock") or by making a declaration to the effect, then what is being said is fictional, not deceptive, and if it is intended to be funny, it is a joke.
[size=10]I feel I'm gonna move on back down south
you know where the water tastes like cherry wine[/size]
IMO its more than OK to lie to avoid hurting other people's feelings.
is it?
but when they find out you lied, they usually feel worse
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
so FATTY wud u get offended if someone called you a fatty?
or wud u rather they considered ur feelings?
LilSis,
Why is that offensive?
[size=10]I feel I'm gonna move on back down south
you know where the water tastes like cherry wine[/size]
It is permitted to lie to make two muslims raazi with each other. Eg Zayd and Bakr are not speaking. You can go to Zayd and say Bakr wants to make up with you but he's embarassed, and go to Bakr and say same thing to make them get along again.
Or you can lie in warfare because in a hadeeth it is stated to the effect that war is deception or something similar.
There are other instances where you can lie but Ulama should be consulted for them.
But this should not be taken to mean we can practice tuqya - because that is cowardice.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
I at times get annoyed when people make excuses for me and my erm... weight.
Its not polite to teeter around the issue. :twisted:
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
no actually i dont!! i usually just laugh lol - no feelings to consider
its clrealy obvious that if they say im fine...that they are lying, or plain blind :oops:
and im a man who prefers the truth - no matter what, no beating around the bush stuff.
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
you boys would say that. girls are more sensitive. :roll:
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
to add to the first point - i heard a shaykh say that if a person who sins shows improvement i.e. they have stopped comitting that sin, it is a sign that they repented and Allah has forgiven them. so we have no right to reveal that sin which Allah has freed them from and covered up for them.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
exactly
this "fat n proud" mentality dont exist for women :roll:
thanx to societal expectations.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
The worst situation to be in is when someone is asking you for a character reference for someone else regarding marraige.
I know of marraiges that have gone wrong because the truth was hidden/covered up.
God Forbid that I should ever be in such a situation....but if I was ever asked, I would tell the truth. After all, I wouldnt like it if someone hid matters that would affect the rest of my life from me.
that's a tough situation especially if it's a close mate. I duno in your culture but in ours word often gets around who gave the character reference. So if a marriage falls through you bet they'd be at your door blaming you :?
However if you don't tell the truth then the family who came to you for the character reference will slate you, you can't blimin win with our ppl.
If you have bad news about the suitor, speak to him first and gain an impression and then only be blunt to the would-be bride if you got a pretty ugly impression, otherwise you can clear your mind and say everything's gonna be fine. Just fine.
[size=10]I feel I'm gonna move on back down south
you know where the water tastes like cherry wine[/size]
I think thats probably better.
But in the situation i'd tell the truth so in the end they cant come back and say i didnt tell them and if they do find out that it fell thru coz of what you said then thats not completely your fault. Why should we suffer for someone elses mistakes.
IMO both people should enter into this relationship with the plain truth and anything less will likely cause problems later on.
Back in BLACK
Yes but if you highlight issues you happen to know about without seeking a context you may be doing somebody a great disservice and putting the bride in a tough position.
[size=10]I feel I'm gonna move on back down south
you know where the water tastes like cherry wine[/size]
Thats why people usually ask someone who would know that person well... or atleast provide the correct context for these issues. The mass of men lead lives of quite desperation, sometimes it can be healthy to voice the desperation.
Back in BLACK
Character reference is an amanah and it must be discarded correctly.
It may well be a dodgy situation but if your opinion is sought either decline to give it or if u do give it then it must be honest.
One of my cousins asked me about a relation in pakistan. She was the sister of one of my sisters-in-law and obviously my sis-in-law was trying hard to fix my cousin and her sister up but I just point blank told him to steer well away.
Sis-in-law was/is miffed with me but what can she do. Life goes on - you live and learn and carry on.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
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