Plan for new law over forced marriages
Families who force their daughters into marriage could face an appearance in court under controversial proposals to protect young British Asians from abuse.
Community elders who encourage parents or connive in their arrangements could also be prosecuted in a wide-ranging crackdown to be unveiled tomorrow.
The Home Office minister Baroness Scotland will launch a consultation on proposals to introduce a specific offence of 'forcing someone to marry'.
The Home Office recognises that there are concerns children forced into marriage will not wish to see their parents prosecuted.
At the same time, there are already offences such as kidnap, false imprisonment and child cruelty that can be used in forced marriage cases. But ministers believe a new offence could have an important deterrent effect on parents and relatives.
The plan to make forced marriage a criminal offence is deeply controversial, coming amid the already heated debate over the integration of British ethnic minority communities following the London bombings. Campaigners say parents' decisions cannot be divorced from pressures within the wider community to maintain traditions.
However, she said some could be dissuaded from seeking help if they thought their parents might be jailed: 'They want help, they want protection, but there may be a fear that it will go further than they want,' she said.
[url=http://observer.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,6903,1562549,00.html]OBSE...
who here thinks that this new law can work?
i dont-no girl woud have the guts to call for her parents to be locked up
the question is , what realistic action can or should be taken against parents who force their children in to marriage against their will?
I dont think jail is realistic....
i dont think ANY action should be taken against parents who do this
u cant lock ur parents up
government should only focus on "preventive measures"
It is a joke that this law has to come into play in the first place and secondly it is debated.
There should be no place for forced marriage so thats why there shouldnt have been a reason for it.
Sadly though it goes on and i hope that parents who do force there daughters/sons into marriage then they are seen as criminals.
As muslims it will not affect us in any way as it is totally haram to be forced into marriage and so if i hear of any that do kick up a fuss then they are obviosuly in disagreement with basic islamic teaching not just british law.
The thing that it wont stop though is the emotional blackmail and other 'forceful' ways that parents may use to get someone married.
A clever mind can entertain a thought without accepting it
I think action or punishment has to come from the Muslim community. Name and shame?
but dont you think if a new law is passed, and parents ar elocked up for a short time, wont they learn their lessons for the rest of thei rlives?
no they wouldnt learn no lesson-their arrogance and culture will not allw them
my sister mate called up the police on her dad-he was always beating her up
finally she couldnt take no more-she called the police on him and he spent the night in jail
did he learn from his mistake? NO
he thought SHE was in the wrong and has never ever spoken to his dauhter since that day
Too be honest this law is flawed, considering how the south asian community is, it so close that it cannot make no difference. I think that first they need to be acceptance within the Muslim community. Too this day, I have never heard a imaam in one of his speeches talk about force marriage. They need to be a open discussion and views need to be challenge. Too be honest the imaam are too scared as the commitee are fill with partrotic pakistani and bengali and that where the problem lies. In time this problem will disappear, but as always new ones will appear.
"A true Muslim is thankful to Allah in prosperity, and resigned to His will in adversity."
[url=http//www.guidancemedia.com/videostream.php?id=Burda.mov]Quran[/url]
i agree
our mosque imams havnt accepted this as an problem
i have never heard a mosque imam speak about this issue
my heart breaks when I hear of girls going thru this-
What about the blokes, it may not be as easy to notice, but it break them up as well. Many take to drugs and drinks and some of them go down a worser line.
"A true Muslim is thankful to Allah in prosperity, and resigned to His will in adversity."
[url=http//www.guidancemedia.com/videostream.php?id=Burda.mov]Quran[/url]
like with any law passed.........there are bound to be miscarriages of justice
locking parents up is absurd, but based on false accusations is wrong
there are bound to be mix-ups between arranged and forced marriages and i fear for parents
the law is designed to allow love marriages!!
cant see it working too much anyway
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
Salam
This law will never come into being.
Why?
Because there is no such thing as a forced marriage. It simply doesn't exist.
Omrow
really doesnt exist?
and what makes the Omrow so sure?
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
Salam
Find me a "victim" and I will believe you.
Omrow
living in cloud cuckoo again are we?
i know ppl persoanlly who have been forced in to marraige, have been emotionally blackmailed!
As for this law, only ppl with a lot of confidence will actually come forward to say they have been forced into it but most out of fear wont. so really i dont see it workin becuz most ppl will just brush these type of things under the carpet and deal with it which is pretty sad.
i know someone who is in the process of getting married to a someone against there will, merely to please family members.
even tho both are aware they dont like each other
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
I have to disagree with some of the points about mosques and imams. Although I am not aware of the situation in other cities, in my city I have heard a number of leading ulama speak in jumu'ah khutbah and in tals about the impermissibility of forced marriages. So from my experience I have come across ulama who speak clearly on this issue.
One question I do have is, what exactly constitutes a forced marriage. Personally I think if a person gets married to some1 solely because it will keep his/her family happy then I dont think that's forced. If the person doesn't speak to parents and just assumes or is pretty sure that they will be upset if he says no then thats not forced. Forced in my view is if he/she says I dont want to marry her/him. and THEN the parents say I'm gonna kill myself if you dont do this, or we'r gonna kill you if you dont do do this. Then its forced. If the person just feels sad but still for the sake of happiness gets married without raising objection then its not really forced.
Forced marriages where they have violent threats or ignore protests and go ahead and arrange a marriage is obviously not on. Im just not sure if a person marrying to keep his family happy necessarily means he is forced?
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
Salam
I am so surprised at the lack of thinking of people.
Maybe they are incapable.
Anyway, to reply to the above example:
If this went ahead it would not be considered a crime either in Islam or in British law.
In a court of law, no judge would fault the parents whose daughter did something unwillingly to please them.
It was NOT a forced marriage. She was a "reluctant partner" to the act.
GOD !!!
I thought only women needed spoon feeding.
Omrow
if they get married to please family members solely in fear of bieng disowned.............despite many protests highlighting their dislike for the other party and no wish to continue with the wedding arrangements.....isnt that forced?
no need for death threats or threats to kill
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
i think the reason why a person marries the person to keep family happy i smainly beacuse they know if they say no the person who they have been told to marry the family will get upset...or the family will not accept him her marrying oiutside the family. You should be able to marry anyone you want..if you cant then you are really forced in to marrying someone who you areally DONT WANT TO MARRY
i have experienced that a boy/girl wants to marry a good islamic boy/girl but parents only choice is which cousin do you want to marry? WHICH IS SAD AND AGAIN IS A FORCED MARRAIGE!
reluctant = doesnt want to go ahead
Islam requires both parties to be happy with the arrangements
GOD !!!
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
you know what, i kinda agree with this law. okay i dont know the ins and outs and have not analysed the wording of it.
but forced marriages are wrong. i've known of some sisters who have been mentally scarred by such ordeals. yesterday one of my best mates told me that this girl wanted his number. he gave it, and started talking nto her.
after a few days talk, she told him that she was married and was forced. she needed a friend to talk to.
last year a girl in my area was forced to get married in desh. i used to see her on the bus to work, but never spoke to her. but she fancied me,.. after she got married she sent me, valentines cards, i feel sorry for her..
i think the idea of charging the parents who do this horrid act is a good idea.. at least it would act as a deterrent.
the other side of the coin - what causes someone to be forced into marriage? A lot of the time its lack of communication between the parents and the children. If the children opened their hearts to their parents, and spoke openly, I really can't understand why a parent would do such a thing.
[b][i]Round and round the Ka'bah,
Like a good Sahabah,
One step, Two step,
All the way to jannah[/i][/b]
I agree with Medievalist that IMO its a forced marriage only when he/she says I dont want to marry her/him and THEN the parents say I'm gonna kill myself or we'r gonna kill you if you dont do do this, or start the emotional blackmail. Then its forced. Which is just plain wrong; your expected to spend the rest of your life with such a person whom you never liked to begin with and didnt want to marry. They're not just ruining their son/daughters life they're ruining the others life as well.
In my personally opinion if the child hasnt mentioned to his parents how he/she feels about this marriage, if he/she agrees or not, then i dont think its forced. Atleast tell them how you feel, weither they reciprocate or not leave that to them, but as their parents atleast allow them the right to the truth. And in the majority of cases parents will be fine with your decision.
However there have been the few cases where the parent did put pressure on their son/daughter to get married forcefully, even after they've said 'no'. Such parents do these things for a number of reason e.g. family status, caste, wealth, power and even for the childs better future. No one here has mentioned that maybe the kids dont knw whats gonna be good for them in the long run and in such a case a parents needs to make their decision for the benefit of the child even if the child doesnt agree with it at first. I just dont think people should label such parents as mental cases simply for thinking about their son/daughters better future. They're your parents for God sake, they've raised you since you were a child, fed you, clothed you, educated you the best they could. IMO that gives us no right to think of our happyness over theirs.
Lack of communication and stubborn people lead to marrying people you dont wanna marry.
Back in BLACK
a man should me a MAN
put his foot down and say No :twisted:
btw emotional blackmail is also a form of forced marraige
Maybe if the woman spoke up aswell things wouldnt be soo messed up.
Cant put the blame on the guy.
The girl being silent will only make it look like she accepts.
Back in BLACK
for those who claim equality of both sexes. either both men and women can be forced or if a man should have the courage to say no then a woman should also have the courage to say no. if women are so eager to work with men, study with men, go to magazine meetings with me, claim every right that men have then they cant play the poor weak woman part when it comes to marriage. Either she should have the courage to say no just as the men shoul, or men can be just as forced as women.
cant have it both ways.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
LOL v tru
thankfully I have the courage to say NO-
I have the guts to ask ANYONE "what part of NO dont u undertand"
too bad not every women is as outspoken as me
most are weak and are easily done in my family pressure-they crack when their mum does the drama act
which is why thousands of girls go thru this
more then guys do
A bit off topic but Im going to mention it for purposes of barakah anyway.
When Sayyidina Ali radhiyallahu anhu came with the proposal for Sayyidatuna Fatima radhiyallahu anha, Holy Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam said to Bibi Sahiba radhiyallahu anha to the effect that 'Fatimah! Ali mentions you.' and Sayyidatuna Fatima radhiyallahu anha remained silent. Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam was immensely pleased at the modesty of His daughter and took her silence as her consent.
Now even this is the custom in some families that they mention the proposal infront of the bride and if she remains silent it is taken as her consent. SubhanALLAH! I was at one of these proposals and the girl was on the other side of the curtain. When the girl remained silent you will not believe how happy Mawlana was that his daughter followed the sunnah of Bibi Sahiba radhiyallahu anha. Mawlana was beaming with joy saying: daughter you have pleased me indeed.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
It all depends on the individual. The silence is a (sunnag) form of consent.
However the girl has all right to say yay or nay.
And most will.
And this aspect has to have been explained to the girl befoer hand.
Otherwise she may think silence mean 'I'll think about it'.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
her "silence" can also be due to a threat hanging over her head
many people abuse this concept
yes possibly. But not in the case that I referred to. The family is very good and learned, including the women folk.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
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