Ok, so my neighbours have a kid whose like 10. And juding by the loud shouting matches we can sometimes over hear im pretty sure their home situation isnt all too wizard.
Anyway so they have this 10 year old kid, and there always this girl about his age that rides bikes with him ALL THE TIME. I mean they've been friends for what seems like forever and they ride their bikes with each other everyday. Every so often when im passing by i'll catch a glimpse of their conversation, and they talk about the cutest things. This one time he said something to her (i didnt catch it) but she replies 'I dont understand that'
and he says 'what?'
to which she replies 'how you can be so smart but you dont talk a lot,' at which point he laughs
and said 'Sometimes i have too much ot say and before i say it i move onto thinking about something else."
Its like they're already like a married couple haha. So this one time they were both riding their bikes outside and i was sat in my car. And they're both riding at each other like they're playing chicken and just at the last second they both try to turn away and but crashed and fell over. I get out of the car to see if they're ok and they're both sat there laughing.
So i yelled 'OMG KISS ALREADY!" before starting to walk to the house lmao.
At which point they;re both looking at me all shocked... and then he turns and kisses her
LMAO, lil mans got some moves 
hahaha
Comments
1) You shouldn't be encouraging that
2) bloody hell kids start early
3) aww
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Aaw thats cute.
But at that age i thnk theyre just playing. Its all innocent really.
And I heard as it were, the noise of thunder. One of the four beasts saying come and see and I beheld, a pale horse. And his name that sat on him was Death... and Hell followed with him.
Hahaha, egg them on, why don't you?
LOL i wasnt encouraging anything. I shouted it as a joke. As they are really young im sure its just innocent. Though i do tease him about it when i ask him 'hows your girlfriend' haha.
I can be evil like that
Back in BLACK
How could you be so sure that they're innocent.
Kids these days have changed lol.
I don't agree with the innocent argument. Talking about Muslims here - I don't like it especially when adults joke about their little children having boyfriends and girlfriends. Obviously the kids are innocent, but it's the messages that are given through what is said, that I don't like. It makes it sound ok and normal. It's like when toddlers and young kids swear and people find it cute and hilarious and don't bother telling them off. Kids don't know any better but I don't think we're supposed to egg them on.
Sorry for sounding all moody on your cute story. lol
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Because i have this weird, almost psychic you could say, gift slash super power where im an amazing judge of character.
Kids havent changed. Kids are kids. Its the world thats changed. The world used to be a bigger place.
Back in BLACK
so you think my storys cute? interesting.
You know they say our first instinct about somthing is usually the right one.
I stand by what happened, i perceived no harm. I dont think you can not judge a child by the standards of adults.
Back in BLACK
that wasn't my first instinct...or only part of it
I just don't want to be overly annoying.
I can see where you're coming from and it is "cute", I still don't see it as being "right". It's not about judging kids, it's about what we do, being the ones who know better.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Im pretty sure that amounts to judging lol.
Back in BLACK
You do not seem to be getting my point. But if you're saying I'm judging adults or you (in this situation), then yeah, sure, I am.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Feef; you accept that you cant judge children by the standards of adults and yet thats exactly what you're doing.
Im not saying we should encourage such relations but i dont think we should be holding a shotgun wedding just yet.
Back in BLACK
It's ridiculous for you to call it "judging". It's quite simple, the way you behave with kids, what you say and do affects what and how they think. It's silly to say that the environment does not affect them...dpi you think the grandsons of the Prophet
would be joking about having girlfriends? Or the sahaba would encourage such things because it's all innocent? I don't think so but it'd be interesting to find out differently. It is our job to bring up children based on Islamic principles so certain things should be off limits, yet living in the non-Islamic societies that we do, it's so normalized that it seems extreme to suggest differently.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Kids learn from their surroundings and how people act around them.
At a young age, they will know some basics of right and wrong, but the rest of adult behaviour is learnt through observation.
So its not about simply promoting specific actions, but presenting them as normal, acceptable or even desireable that can all have negative impacts.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Its not ridiculous at all. It is what it is, just because you dont agree with it doesnt mean im wrong.
There are many factors that affect a child, environment and personality being two. Though i wouldnt say environment is the be all and end all. I wouldnt venture into guess work over what the grandsons of the Prophet (pbuh) did or didnt do and i suggest you dont either without proper references.
I know me and my brother grew up with our cousins sisters where we played together all the time... and we turned out fine. But i would be interested to know what you consider to be Islamic principles upon which children should be brought up on?
I think its more of a question of whats reasonable, rather than going down normal and extremist lane.
Back in BLACK
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Seraphim...would you mind elaborating on why you think its all innocent?
I really wanted to refrain from commenting with my own personal thoughts on this blog, but it's making me more angry.
1) I want to understand with what intentions you wrote this blog. Its an event that happened that you were part of. You ended it by telling two ten year olds to kiss. I want you to explain to me as older Muslim guy why this was described as innocent. Why you wrote about it like it was a 'cool' thing to say. Imagine you were the older brother of the 10 year old girl or 10 year old boy.
2) You claim that you weren't encouraging it. You said it as a joke. But they listened to you. And I find it scary that you are not feeling guilty. Kids have a developing brain. They hear, they observe, the copy, they learn fast. We are the ones that are getting older and losing brain cells. We need to be careful what we teach the next generation, mate, because without barriers and discipline, things go haywire and in a day and age where the world seemingly lacks common sense, we need to be more careful about the impact each of us individuals have. Quality of a person is important. And that is what all the sahabas had: quality. Has it really come to that time that we are needing sources and references to check whether the grandsons of the Prophet
would have encouraged 10 year olds kissing and girlfriends? Shame on you.
3) 'Kids havent changed. Kids are kids. Its the world thats changed.'
If the world changes, kids change with it. Put a kid in an environment long enough and he/she will be more aware of how things work faster than we imagine.
4) We're living in a world now where it is difficult to find good role models. It is difficult to find people who we can aspire and still live with the guidance we have been given by the Qu'ran. Temptation is there all the time. And we all need to work together to help each develop and enhance the quality in our personalities that the Prophet
and the Muslims back in the day displayed. That was cool. This is not.
5) Now our reactions may seen 'extreme' to you. But if it does, then that is sad. We also live in a society where Muslims who dont drink alcohol or go clubbing are the extreme ones. And I sometimes feel exasperated, annoyed and tired of having to justify basic things to people because they are using those Muslims who drink, eat pork and dont pray as examples of what our religion says. When is it going to become a norm for a Muslim to be defined as someone who refrains from all this because God (swt) tells us to.
It's a little dangerous to plant such ideas in the minds of innocent children. Let them remain innocent, it's the beauty of childhood. Also be cautious with using terms such as girlfriend when talking to him...let them just be friends...why try to break something which is already in perfect working order.
Khair regardless he's a kid so in shaa Allah he won't be judged for that action, but for those who encourage it ....well Allah knows best.
Wow talk about creating a mountain out of a mole hill. Over-react much?
Okay firstly this was simply supposed to be just a funny story without having to go into those loong meaning of life kinda thing that you guys often get into, as whats life without the ability to make stupid choices?
I dunno, maybe I assume too much when i write these things, maybe I see some things as obvious and therefore do not require an explanation. Or take things at face value. I realise im often guilty of jumping to another thought before ive even finished expressing the first and that sometimes causes no end of confusion. Or maybe people arent familiar with the concept of funny stories, dont worry about it; its relatively new.
And FYI when i say Innocent; I mean someone who lacks guilt of any specific crime or someone who lacks experience of any given thing and therefore they did not reasonably know any better and can be excluded from liability for the said action. Children lack the capacity to appreciate the nature and wrongfull-ness of what they were saying or doing.
Visa ve children are said to be innocent and by extension the things they say or do. To suggest they seriously consider each other as bf/gf or have those "feelings" is beyond laughable... oh what the hell i'll laugh anyway Mwhahahahahaha.
It reminds me of when you see people with their nephews or neices and you'll see them pick the kid up and kiss him/her on the cheek. I dont particulary think theres anything wrong with that either, though i guess people on here may feel differently. To whom i say 'grow the frack up, you're not primary school anymore'. People will talk, they will hug you (no matter how hard you try to avoid it) and sometimes they will go in for the kiss (even auntiejees). But that doesnt make them bf/gf... it may make them FRENCH but i wouldnt start drawing love hearts just yet.
I certainly dont think the Prophet (pbuh) or the Sahaba approved of bf/gf kissing. But are you seriously saying you think these kids are bf/gf? Eeer no. They're 10 year olds playing and having a laugh. They ride bikes and sit and eat icecream whilst watching traffic go by. Things i did when i was a kid and there definately wasnt anything inappropriate about it when i did it.
But maybe the rules have changed and everyones "at it" these days from the 10 year old Charlie Browns to the 80 year old Hugh Hefners. Personally i think thats a load of horse crap, but feel free to think im wrong just dont expect me to give a damn.
Back in BLACK
What we said is about the adults on such a situation ***not the kids***...I shouldn't reply but I just don't understand why you don't get what's being said.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
How can you be so unaware of what is going on around us everyday?
There are 12 year old kids having kids.
Media, hear and say, blogs, internet, news, facebook, therevival. These are all sources of information about what is going on in the world today. How can you not have recognised that the world has changed? I dont think it takes a genuis to figure that one out. In the current world, we have more freedom to explore. Kids have access to internet. Kids can watch whatever they like on the internet all by themselves. We cannot control that aspect of their lives. But we can take control of other aspects of their lives.
If you dont give a damn, then who is supposed to give a damn about the next generation?
I think its fair to say that most of us on this forum also recognise a funny story when we see one and I dont think we lack of sense of humour either. So the concept of not being familiar with a funny story doesn't apply to
1) the members on here
2) the people who are not members and reading this blog (being the people who I shared this website with once upon a time and who check it here and then and who felt strongly against this blog)
And finally we cannot make general statements about kids as they are all individuals and each have a different upbringing. I have met a couple of kids these past couple of weeks with advanced vocabulary and understanding of the real world. We are not in a position to say what we think they understand and dont understand.
Im sorry if you feel targetted. But I felt quite strongly against it and I know if anyone encouraged my brothers the same way when they were younger, there would be serious consequences for that person.
I think that's a fair comment towards me when you say 'lighten up'. I never meant anything towards intentions/meaning no harm etc. I know no harm was intended. I'm more concerned about the lack of guilt after.
i think sbf is coming across as "heavy on" because she has had to express and explain her point a few times and she has done so in a clear, distinct, straight forward (and quite admirable) way. If i was as eloquent as her I would have said the exact same things. I feel exactly the way she feels, word for word.
I just didnt comment because I didnt know how to express my point of view/feeling.
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Seraphim; now dont get all defensive on me. Im sure you realise what you did was wrong (on some level). But it sounds like you didnt really think about what you were saying before you said it. I once asked for a martini from an ice-cream van lol. Clearly my mind was somewhere else (dont ask). Even if it was just a joke. We are accountable for everything we say, even things said as a joke.
SBF; learn to let go. Your job was to point it out and Im sure he can read and realises he shouldnt have shouted it. Your jobs not to harrass people into pushing you away. Even if he doesnt express any guilt over it, your jobs done. Forgive and forget.
(i would make an brilliant teacher!)
And I heard as it were, the noise of thunder. One of the four beasts saying come and see and I beheld, a pale horse. And his name that sat on him was Death... and Hell followed with him.
Consider it done! (After I replied to the blog the first time - and then I felt I had to explain again. Apologies for coming across too strongly to anyone who felt that way.).
Today is a good day alhamdulillah
Sbf doesnt nees to learn to let go. She already does that very well. She only CAME ACROSS as pushy because she had to explain her point a few times. But she never forced anyone and as far as i could see didnt try to push anyone away while defending her point.
Or ive got this wrong....
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Looked like you were attacking the brother lol
What needed to be said has been said. Think its best to leave it there before things escalate.
And I heard as it were, the noise of thunder. One of the four beasts saying come and see and I beheld, a pale horse. And his name that sat on him was Death... and Hell followed with him.
(shrugs) i dunno. Everyones capable of being wrong.
And I heard as it were, the noise of thunder. One of the four beasts saying come and see and I beheld, a pale horse. And his name that sat on him was Death... and Hell followed with him.
This is a matter of opinion and i will state mine. She didnt sound like she was attacking the brother.
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
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