Sesame Street and same-sex marriage
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/cifamerica/poll/2011/aug/11/sesa...
there's too links both worth clicking on

wont somebody PLEASE think of the puppets!!?!

Seems like an attempt to politicise childhood.

The same can confront the issue when they are older.

(is anyone on Sesame street married?)

You wrote:

Seems like an attempt to politicise childhood.

The same can confront the issue when they are older.

(is anyone on Sesame street married?)

"Bert and Ernie are best friends. They were created to teach preschoolers that people can be good friends with those who are very different from themselves.

Even though they are identified as male characters and possess many human traits and characteristics (as most Sesame Street Muppets™ do), they remain puppets, and do not have a sexual orientation."

Almost a year on, and my imaan is at an all time low and my feelings greater than ever. I don't know what to even tthink or do these days. Life is just seeming like its being dragged out to the end and there is no purpose. I'm just there, but not living.

Retromode wrote:

Almost a year on, and my imaan is at an all time low and my feelings greater than ever. I don't know what to even tthink or do these days. Life is just seeming like its being dragged out to the end and there is no purpose. I'm just there, but not living.

Its been a really long time, what solutions have you tried to overcome your feelings? From a lot of the above posts, you honestly seem like a very positive thinker and you do realise that Allah is testing you and you do trust Allah in everything that happens. Just continue trying and fighting your way through and i'A you'll be guided. (I do understand it can be hard at times, but I havn't been through such a situation so i can't say i know how your feeling).

Good luck to them

Cant islamically do something unislamic.

Its like reading bismillah when eating pork. Not allowed and it has to be acknowledged as wrong.

You wrote:

Cant islamically do something unislamic.

What if that benefits Islam?

You wrote:

Its like reading bismillah when eating pork. Not allowed and it has to be acknowledged as wrong.

You can if your life is in danger

Wrong is still wrong  and if it leads to better, it doesnt matter, thats not a valid excuse.

and if you want to imagine a life where your life will be in danger but i will leave that to you.

No solutions as such, more of just trying to get rid of these feelings and trying to commit myself onto a straight path to Allah. The worst thing is not being able to talk to a single soul about this and just putting on a front every single day. Friends and family have started commenting on how I'm always so angry and bitter these days but I can't bring myself to tell them exactly why.

I know and understand that Allah is testing me, but is there no end to this? Will I just forever be in constant battle with my nafs?

Or did you suppose that you would enter the Garden without facing the same as those who came before you? Poverty and illness afflicted them and they were shaken to the point that the Messenger and those who believed with him said, ‘When is Allah’s help coming?’ Be assured that Allah’s help is very near. (2:214)

 

stay strong. how abt you tell yourself you're not gay? and just like any other urges. lower your gaze, stay away from movies/series anything that might lead to you having those feelings. fast?

 

It is related 'Abdu'r-Rahman ibn Yazid said, "I visited 'Abdullah with 'Alqama and al-Aswad. 'Abdullah said, 'We were with the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, when we were young men and had nothing at all. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to us, "Company of young men! Any of you who can afford it should marry. It lowers the eyes and preserves the genitals. Anyone who is unable to should fast. It restrains the appetite."'" bukhari

Lilly wrote:

Or did you suppose that you would enter the Garden without facing the same as those who came before you? Poverty and illness afflicted them and they were shaken to the point that the Messenger and those who believed with him said, ‘When is Allah’s help coming?’ Be assured that Allah’s help is very near. (2:214)

 

stay strong. how abt you tell yourself you're not gay? and just like any other urges. lower your gaze, stay away from movies/series anything that might lead to you having those feelings. fast?

 

It is related 'Abdu'r-Rahman ibn Yazid said, "I visited 'Abdullah with 'Alqama and al-Aswad. 'Abdullah said, 'We were with the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, when we were young men and had nothing at all. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to us, "Company of young men! Any of you who can afford it should marry. It lowers the eyes and preserves the genitals. Anyone who is unable to should fast. It restrains the appetite."'" bukhari

 

Thanks. It's not I keep telling myself that I'm gay that's the problem, it's more deep rooted than that. It's more the lack of understanding, the lack of answers that's more troubling. Ramadan is coming up and inshallah I will be fasting  and using it as another opportunity to try my utmost to regain my imaan and to gain peace of mind. But honestly I wouldn't wish this upon anyone and urge you to instead of just condemning it try and understand that these feelings aren't asked for.  I thank Allah that he didn't let me go down the same path  as many of those with the same feeling.

what are your questions?

Lilly wrote:

what are your questions?

 

Well the main question is, why? Why this?

And deep down I probably do know the answer but it doesn't seem to be enough. I don't know.

It's just your challenge.

Don't define yourself by such desires etc.

It is not the whole of life.

Retromode wrote:

Almost a year on, and my imaan is at an all time low and my feelings greater than ever. I don't know what to even tthink or do these days. Life is just seeming like its being dragged out to the end and there is no purpose. I'm just there, but not living.

InshaAllah this will help you more than we can: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/StraightStruggle/

I really wish there was more out there for people who are going through what you're going through. It saddens me that we just look down and curse people who feel same sex attraction instead of helping them. I was just reading through the comments underneath the about page of this website www.gaymuslims.org and I'm so touched by some of them. It's saddening that there are people out there who feel they've tried everything yet they can't get rid of feeling gay and wish they could commit suicide, yet this is haraam too so they can't. Yet it shows a great sense of strength to be dealing with it in such way that the person is still trying their best to live according to Islam despite feeling like ending their life!

I have great admiration for people like you and the person in the example I used, who are trying to not give in to these desires and I really wish I could help you. However I'm not sure how anyone could help, I don't think straight people could truly understand what someone who believes they are born gay or just can't stop being attracted to someone of the same sex and really wants to give in to their desires, is going through. I mean it's hard enough for us to deal with stopping straight girlfriend-boyfriend relationships - Which are somewhat more "natural" yet still wrong - how do we deal with something we just cannot understand? We can tell people to read the Quran, do dhikr and "get closer to Allah/Islam" but what of the people who have tried and failed these things?! What do we do with them?!
I think I should stop with this message, I'm not helping much am I?

Retromode, you shall be in my duas inshaAllah.

You wrote:

It's just your challenge.

Don't define yourself by such desires etc.

It is not the whole of life.

That's almost just like saying "it just is, get on with it". I'm sorry if I'm coming across all woe be me and trying to get very one to feel sorry for me. It's just that constantly battling with this problem has left me weak and distant from my religion. Then reading comments on here and generally the views of Muslims regarding this topic is soul destroying. And lastly there is no need for me to define myself by this problem, I FEEL it constantly on a daily basis, there doesn't seem to be anyway of getting away from it.

I actually sense your enuthusiasm to want better and i can see that you 'do' want help. I think that makes a start.

ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE wrote:

Retromode wrote:

Almost a year on, and my imaan is at an all time low and my feelings greater than ever. I don't know what to even tthink or do these days. Life is just seeming like its being dragged out to the end and there is no purpose. I'm just there, but not living.

InshaAllah this will help you more than we can: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/StraightStruggle/

I really wish there was more out there for people who are going through what you're going through. It saddens me that we just look down and curse people who feel same sex attraction instead of helping them. I was just reading through the comments underneath the about page of this website www.gaymuslims.org and I'm so touched by some of them. It's saddening that there are people out there who feel they've tried everything yet they can't get rid of feeling gay and wish they could commit suicide, yet this is haraam too so they can't. Yet it shows a great sense of strength to be dealing with it in such way that the person is still trying their best to live according to Islam despite feeling like ending their life!

I have great admiration for people like you and the person in the example I used, who are trying to not give in to these desires and I really wish I could help you. However I'm not sure how anyone could help, I don't think straight people could truly understand what someone who believes they are born gay or just can't stop being attracted to someone of the same sex and really wants to give in to their desires, is going through. I mean it's hard enough for us to deal with stopping straight girlfriend-boyfriend relationships - Which are somewhat more "natural" yet still wrong - how do we deal with something we just cannot understand? We can tell people to read the Quran, do dhikr and "get closer to Allah/Islam" but what of the people who have tried and failed these things?! What do we do with them?!
I think I should stop with this message, I'm not helping much am I?

Retromode, you shall be in my duas inshaAllah.

Thanks, and no your message was really helpful. I just wish most other Muslims could view this topic in the same way. I've seen that site in the past too and it's great to hear from other people in the same position. Thank you.

Hummus wrote:

I actually sense your enuthusiasm to want better and i can see that you 'do' want help. I think that makes a start.

The enthusiasm and want is definitely there, but it's a case of getting something done with it. It's not even one step forward two steps back, it's just two steps back.

Retromode wrote:

, I FEEL it constantly on a daily basis, there doesn't seem to be anyway of getting away from it.

 

that's what i was trying to say with my pervious post. try and stay away from things which remind you of this on a daily basis.

why you ask.

this is what came to my mind when you asked that:

On the authority of Abu Yahya Suhaib bin Sinan (May Allah be pleased with him) it is related that the Prophet (Peace be upon him) said,

“How amazing is the affair of the believer. There is good for him in everything and that is for no one but the believer. If good times come his way, he expresses gratitude to Allah and that is good for him, and if hardship comes his way, he endures it patiently and that is better for him.”

[Muslim]

 Narrated 'Aisha: (the wife of the Prophet) Allah's Apostle said, "No calamity befalls a Muslim but that Allah expiates some of his sins because of it, even though it were the prick he receives from a thorn." (Bukhari)

Narrated Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri and Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that."  BUkhari

 Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said, "If Allah wants to do good to somebody, He afflicts him with trials."  Bukhari

 

InshaaAllah these hadiths help you go through your trial. think abt all your sins being expiated inshaaAllah because of this trial so that you will go back to Allah pure and ready to go Jannah.

Lilly wrote:

that's what i was trying to say with my pervious post. try and stay away from things which remind you of this on a daily basis.

....

What generally stay away from men then?!

But no what you say is 100% correct. I have to admit that I have found when I am 'busy' such as with work, uni or any other task and I haven't got time to start thinking about my personal problems etc, I generally find myself fine. It's when I have idle time and really start delving into my mind and start thinkning about things and trying to obtain answers, that's when it hits me the most. Inshallah i'm coing to use this coming up time towards Ramadhan to really try and increase my imaan as much as I can, to then really take full advantage of Ramadhan and become a more stronger person, both spiritually and mentally. Hopefully, then I will be able to continue my life and find peace. Thank you.

im sure you don thit on EVER guy... but yeah.. if that's what it requires. i do it, so can you!

Retro- so what if you're gay, it's no big deal.  A persons sexuality is their own business and believe me it's a minor thing. If you look at the core of what you are, you'll say you are just a person trying to get on as best as you can.  You may say you are kind and funny you might even then say you are Muslim, and state your profession, all I know is that you are much more than just gay. You must understand that other facets of your personality are much more important than your sexual orientation.

whilst you may wish to display many facets of your personality to the world, you do not have to display your sexual preference that's entirely your own business and your own secret.  We all have secrets.  Secrets much worse than our sexuality which I have to say again is a minor thing a very very insignificant thing.

you might think it is all that you are, but believe me you are much more.

Plus, I nearly forgot I'm gonna pray for you.

of course all of the above (apart from the praying) I'm saying assuming no gay act has taken place.

now I feel silly saying anything because I know you will have thought of everything anyway.  You've had time to think of every possible angle.

all we can offer is an ear and i'm sure everyone on ths forum can sincerely say at least that much no matter how they feel about the subject.

 

 

 

Salaam everyone, I felt I should come back and give an 'update' on my situation seeing as all you lovely people took the time and effort to respond during my darkest hours.

Alhamdulillah everything is so much better for me now, I have managed to gain control over these feelings of unnatural desire and I feel I have been guided onto the straight path. The feelings haven't gone and I don't think they ever will, they are still there and I'm reminded of that almost on a daily basis; but the main thing now is that I have found ways of living through this struggle and dealing with it.

The major thing which helped the most was understanding that I was created by Allah as a human being for a specific purpose with a guaranteed reward; he didn't give me any other labels- so I don't need to give myself any. I am a human being. I have my faults, I have my defects and i'm not perfect; but as long as I am striving to do my very best of what Allah has asked I can't go wrong. My feelings aren't sinful, it's acting upon those feelings which is sinful and that is something I will never do, now matter how tempted I am, because inshallah i'm constantly going to remember Allah and strive to improve my condition.

I'm not afraid to admit that I still find it difficult to be in the presence of males, e.g in the mosque, I still find myself admiring males even in public places- in ways which I wish I didn't. But that is nothing compared to what life was like almost a year ago, that was the darkest period of my life and I wouldn't wish that upon anyone. I don't think there ever will be a 'cure' for my condition but i've got remedies to help with me with the symptoms!! Honestly, I never realised the power of namaz and just reading the Quran until now; it's just an endless source of help and support.

I really want to thank you all for your comments, advice and dua's, they were much appreciated even if it didn't seem like it at the time!! May Allah bless you all and guide you.

 

 

 

The Sahaabah were unanimously agreed on the execution of homosexuals, but they differed as to how they were to be executed. Some of them were of the view that they should be burned with fire, which was the view of ‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) and also of Abu Bakr (may Allaah be pleased with him), as we shall see below. And some of them thought that they should be thrown down from a high place then have stones thrown at them. This was the view of Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him).

http://islamqa.info/en/ref/38622

@retromode
Alhamdulillah/MashaAllah brother, really glad you're feeling this way now!

I've come across a Muslim therapist called AbdelRehman Mussa, who has also studied Shariah, who says he has cured homosexuality. I obviously can't say how true that is, but there's no harm in trying. You can contact him on salam@ipersonalenrichment.com

abualabbasassaffah7 wrote:

The Sahaabah were unanimously agreed on the execution of homosexuals, but they differed as to how they were to be executed. Some of them were of the view that they should be burned with fire, which was the view of ‘Ali (may Allaah be pleased with him) and also of Abu Bakr (may Allaah be pleased with him), as we shall see below. And some of them thought that they should be thrown down from a high place then have stones thrown at them. This was the view of Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him).

http://islamqa.info/en/ref/38622

 

Oh please, go away and take your trivial nonsense with you. Why would Allah be known as the most FORGIVING and MERCIFUL if he wanted humans to punish others with death because of their sins? It's no wonder many individuals dealing with homosexuality turn away from Islam if nonsense like that is spouted at them. Maybe you should think about helping them to the right path and advising them on what's right and wrong??

 

Sorry if i'm coming across really harsh but this post has really angered me. If I had come across a post like this back when I was struggling to make sense of things I'm certain it would have been enough to push me over the edge. It's hard enough as it is undergoing this struggle but then to be told that you should be executed, burnt and have stones thrown at you??? Well let me tell you, the feeling of despair and hoplesness that come with feelings of homosexuality are much much worse than your methods of execution. I'd be willing to be executed ten times over rather then go through another hour of feeling the hell that I have experienced in the past. At least there would be an end to the execution.

Please in future think about what you post, just because you link it to some website doesn't make it appropriate. Saying things like that at the wrong time can have devestating consequences.

It just goes to show really that no matter how much I change myself, society will still be fixed in its pathetic views and never will see me as anything more than a 'homosexual'. Well, i'm not. I'm Allah's creation and it's to Him that I will have to answer on the Day of Judgement, not society.

@TPOS.

 

Thank you.

@retromode. ive been upset since i woke up this morning, reading what i read just nwo warmed my heart. jazakAllahkhair for that. and also, jazakAllahkhair for what you said, about us not needing any other names/labels. you've said it so beautifully. May Allah aid you in everything you're doing; dont be scared to make duah to Allah to take away those feelings entirely. He the almight can do anything, dont think abt the hows and the inside working, if that's what you want, then just make duahs and Allah will make it happen if its in ur best interesting in this life and the next.

please ignore abu7. as you can see he's not even a registered member.