I think I’ve heard it all. People who think that it’s a must and that every female should adhere to it without fail (in a stiff upper lip sort of way).
People who believe that it’s not about what we look on the outside as it is actually undeniably, the inside that counts (Hmm, perhaps). And others still – like me, I must admit, who took a while to articulate an opinion.
A journey towards the Hijaab, here is my story.
I was never given a Hijaab ‘talk’ where I was sat down and explained the reasons for it, I found out these on my own (aside from what I was taught in RE of course). It wasn’t forced upon me by my father or mother or anyone else, I chose to embrace it. There were a handful of females, some family and others friends that wore the Hijaab but more that didn’t.
It was a step that had an unspoken ‘No turning back’ sign attached and it was most probably this reason that I didn’t wear the Hijaab at the ‘appointed time’.
I officially put my Hijaab on 5 years ago when I was in Lower Sixth (that’s first year of college to some of you). I guess it was a decision that didn’t formulate overnight and was one that in hindsight I see as being unknowingly built when I chose to replace T-shirts with full sleeved tops for PE in year 9.
That weekend, when I was struck by this life changing epiphany, it was the weekend of the Stop the War Coalition protest against the war in Iraq. My family and I headed to Central London to attend it (yes banners and all!).
Amusingly, I remember that my shoulder length hair was freshly washed and straightened that morning. I definitely took pride in my hair. It’s a sort of beautiful, wonderfully wonderful chestnut brown that is naturally wavy (and it’s extremely easy to style – if I say so myself!). I honestly used to get it cut every three to four weeks (without fail) so the split-ends were kept minimal.
Of course, I was awed by the hair products when I went shopping too. In short, I loved everything about my hair.
So there I was, standing with my super straight hair prepped with heat protection, smoothing serum and finished with a squirt of ‘Freshen and Shine’ spray - (to enhance the glossy look and minimise the frizz!) ready to join the masses of people, Muslims and non-Muslims unified by their disproval of the Iraq invasion.
There was an awesome buzz of adrenaline in the atmosphere. A sort of contentment filled the air, hand in hand with a sense of purpose and love, yet for me, something was amiss.
It was then, that I realised that not one person there, apart from my family and friends of course, could identify me as a Muslim. My religious identity was unknown to the world and at that moment in time I actually felt that my presence within the Ummah was going by pretty much unseen.
In all honesty, the time between then and when I got back home is a blur, however the intensity of that feeling made me realise that maybe, just maybe, it was time to welcome the Hijaab. It wasn’t that I delved into stacks of passages from the Qur’an or Hadith which told me of the outlines of modesty or how the Prophet’s wives dressed or the rewards of being modest in the hereafter; No, this all came later (much later actually).
For me it began with the issue of identity and how I, as a person was perceived by others around me. I wanted to walk down the street knowing that people knew that I was a Muslim.
Monday morning. Back to school. New day, new me (well sort of). To be honest I didn’t think about what people at school were going to say, I don’t remember being worried about it, it felt right, as if something had clicked into place and that’s all that there was to it. I recall I simply took ages pinning my Hijaab into place (by which time I was late and stubbornly decided I was not going to school that day – yes I know, I know, it sounds ridiculous)
So TAKE TWO. After that little glitch, the next day was technically my first day of wearing the Hijaab – 21st February 2006 (which I now have titled my ‘Hijaab - Birthday’). This time I made sure I wasn’t late (I woke up a lot earlier) and after registration (I'm not too sure how it was received in registration to be honest, so let’s skip that) I headed nervously to my first lesson of the day, ICT.
At the end of the long corridor amongst a sea of other pupils, I saw a couple of my friends stood waiting for me outside the classroom. I walked up and placed myself beside them. After a few seconds, one looked past me, squinted into the distance and asked the other friend where I was. Of course I was standing right next to both my friends and for a split second exasperatedly wondered whether my Hijaab had become some sort of invisibility cloak (Harry Potter anyone?).
It hadn’t, of course, so I got their attention by oh so sweetly, thumping them on their arm. Like these friends, my other friends were shocked that I had worn it, sure, but more pleased I found, which was definitely encouraging (especially for someone like me, who feels like an L plated Muslim most of the time).
The only downside I remember at the time was that it felt like outside school, everyone was staring at me with their beady eyes, watching me and judging me (I actually even felt out of place walking into Topshop a few times!) It was a weird awareness, as though I was given entry into ‘the circle of Hijaabis’ yet outcasted from where I had been all of these years.
It took me a while actually to stop feeling like that, and realise that it was me who had constructed this perception in my mind. If only I could talk to my past self and tell me to ‘Get over myself!’ Everyone had their own concerns, what they thought of me wasn’t always important. What was important was to find ways to better myself as a person, inside and out, physically and spiritually.
Honestly, honestly, honestly, you can have the best of both worlds (that sounds so much like a teenage pop song). The way I see it, a moderate balance between what you were and what you hope to become, is how you should live.
For me, it doesn’t always matter that there are a group of ‘sisters’ (or brothers) looking down at you because you do something they disapprove of (yes it may be backed up by Hadith but if you want me to change, constructively help me, talk to me as a person – please don’t stick up your nose at me and judge me) or a group of people teasing you because you restrict yourself from doing things they find normal (if you’re not comfortable with it, then it’s not for you anyway).
At the end of the day, when all’s said and done and all things are considered (heh), the Hijaab is a journey. You don’t have to be perfect as soon as you put it on, you can progress towards perfection in your own time, at your own pace. It’s the beginning of something wonderful, a reminder of who you are and what your end goal is. It’s a conversation, a silence filler, an icebreaker, an opportunity to meet new people, a Dawah spreader, a statement. You are a Muslim, and the Hijaab? Well, just think of it as a cool way to advertise it.
Comments
This story is to a point, inspiring and actually quite funny.
I liked how it establishes that the concept of hijab is something that muslims should be proud of and is a symbol that really defines us as muslims. But what I think needed to be addressed is that hijab is so much more than a peice of cloth or a `label' as the article makes out.Hijab is a form of modesty that allows an indivisual to be seen and treated as a person, rather than as an object and it is applied to both men and women.
But what we have to remember is that its about an inner modesty too. For me Hijaab encompases a deep and meaningful change within, which in turn is reflected in your actions, deeds and then, the way you present yourself. Its about doing whatever is in your power to please Allah (SWT)and ultimately become closer to your Creator.
As a fellow hijabi I always get asked why I adorned the hijab and what lead me to it. In all truth, it was a journey and I agree that its one that you must take on your own accord because a journey of self realisation and stregthening of imman cannot be enforced-- but rather discoverd. For me it really was a discovery of its neccesity, and its obligatory nature that propelled me into the world of the modest hijabi, but again its something I had to discover myself.I remember thinking `You dont HAVE to do it, it just out of choice' but I think it was just a lack of knowledge really that lead me to think that. Once I understood its significance in the Qur'an and had read through the many refernces in Hadiths I realised that this was something that would not only help others distinguish me as a muslim, but most importantly it would help me clearly identify myself as a proud muslim,willing to try very hard to please Allah. In short it made me more aware of the changes I needed tomake to become a better muslim and I think that is the main reason why people choose to adorn the hijab. Our souls crave spiritual healing and we can only gain this through a true belief in the tawheed of Allah (swt) and through taqwa, and I firmly believe hijab directs us tawords one more step to becoming a better person and in turn - a better Muslim.
Subhanallah! Great story, thanks for sharing.
I don't really have anything equivalent to your hijab but for a long time like about 5 years ago i too wanted that muslim identification. I couldn't grow a beard (even though i has never shaved) so i used to wear a kufi and a thawb.
You get a really mixed bunch of feelings when you first step into outside world with your muslim identification. You feel like like all eyes are on you (they're not really) and others will look at and treat you like you're a 'religous dude'. When somebody you have never met in your life will come up to you and say '"ssalamu alaikum" that makes it all worth it.
In the end though i do it for the pleasure of my Lord Allah SWT and not for anybody else's nor my own worldly gain. I don't wear the thawb much at all these days (because i don't believe it's sunnah) but i now have my beard
It's still not the equivalent of your hijab but may Allah reward us for our efforts and let us be the means of preseving the sunnah. May Allah guidde is all. Ameen.
Lets reunite the ummah under one flag LA ILAHA IL ALLAH MUHAMMADUR RASULULLAH
dont worry, that feeling gets renewed everytime to take another step forward, which makes you "look" a little bit more muslim. it's like you enter a new circle and is part of a new club. (Y)
you start off with tops and hijaab and noone looks at you because you look the same as everyone around you (east london and all)
then you start wearing the long dress (calling it jilbab or abaya) and then the other "jilbabies" will smile and maybe even salaam you.
i really like that.
but...
i find it difficult to accept that some of my friend, the one i really like especially, are not "taking the next level" even after we've had discussion. It upsets me. how do i deal with that? i know people go at their own pace etc.. but when it comes to RAEL life situations... ahh...lack of people skills is a killer...
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Islam is not just outward dress code, and eg the jilbab is but one expression of this outward dress code.
Leave them be and as long as they dress modestly, that is enough.
Making too much about appearances has the negative consequence that people will dress muslim just to fit in, but not think Muslim or act Muslim where they don't need to.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
i was listening to a talk and the imam was talking about the aurah for a man is from his knees to his belly button, right?
but he was saying this doesn't just mean covering the area tightly, you should wear something long the covers the area completely (like, between the legs too) otherwise we're not fulfilling Islamic dress-code.
Any thoughts? Cos it kinda makes sense to me. I've heard a lot of brothers complaining about girls in skin-tight clothes, even though they're 'covered', but this applies to men too, surely?
Don't just do something! Stand there.
skin tight and not being able to tell the person was two legs are two extremes don't you think?
Surely having a middle ground is good enough - clothing that is not skin tight.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Well done well expressed enjoyable interesting and reflecting read even as a male, the first response was also very enlightening however dno wt this matey talking about there's no grounds in between it's a black n White religion mate no shades of grey
its not about shades of gray but what is allowed and what is not.
You cn't always keep demanding more and more and expect it to be alright - there is a certain point past which it is ok and then there may be more that is preferrable but go too far to any extreme and it will have its own pitfalls.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Yesterday was my 1st day of wearing niqab!!!
May Allah help all those that are trying and guide all that yet d not know. Ameen.
"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt" - Augustus Waters
Salaam sister,
Congrats on wearing the niqab! I just wanted to ask what made you take that decison because Ive been told that it is not obligitory, correct me if I'm wrong? If you can guide me tawords any relevant hadith's or refrences to the Qur'an then that would be most appreciated. As I do wear the Hijab, I try to implement modesty in all that I do, and my clothing is just an extension of that; as I think we all do know we must all accept and implement the concept of hijab in our actions, the way we hold ourselfs and in everything we do- as well as in the way we dress. So if wearing the niqab will help me become more focused in gaining our Benevolent Creator's pleasure, I'd start now! But I want to know the context, if that makes sense?
Please let a sister understand,
:-i
Thanks,
A
People dont only wear it because they think it is fardh.
Let those that want to wear it wear it.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Yeah thats what I basicly thought, but thanks for clarifying
I didnt attack her or try to insult her in any way and Im not really having any bearing on whether she does or doesnt wear it. So I can't really `let' her in any sense of the word? I was just `wondering' whether it actually was fardh, but I can see the logic and wisdom behind it. I did say howevor, that if this was something that brings an indivisual closer to Allah (SWT) and helps them focus on earning paradise in the akhira rather than getting caught up in the distractions of the duniya, then I think theres nothing better; something I may even take up myself. I was just curious, after speaking to people who do and dont wear it- I got mixed responces
Congrats on taking such a big step!
Do you wear it everywhere? (You're still at school aren't u?)
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
This was directed to `YOU' not ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE
Thanks 'ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE'
You do have a point though that many who wear it do consider it to be fardh.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Yeh, some do and thats just what I wanted to find out about, if it came off as if I was demeaning her for her desicion I really do aploagise because that trully was not my intention.I was just getting anothers perspective of their reasons for taking up the niqab. I think its a brave thing to do, in a world where there is so much adverse opposition to it. So I believe these women should be commended and not singled out, but thats just my oppinion...
And everyone is entitled to one right?
but yep just a general curiosity, nothing personal dont worry!
lol ;p
ok
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Jazakallah!! And yeah... i wear it everywhere... school, outside, to classes etc etc. Allhumdulillah!
but anyhoo.... i think its been a good step... i mean i went shopping 2day for the first tym with it on and (thnxz to diverse london!) people ddnt stare too much... but we (me and my fam) did get the 'ninja, wohaa!!' by sme random guy walking past...! have to say it made me laugh. the fact that they behave like your not human becoz u choose to wear a piece of black cloth over 'your' face, which effects 'them' in which way exactly?!? Lol... May Allah guide them all. Ameen.
Ummm, why i wore it?? well there're a few reasons... firstly my mum and two sisters all my aunts and my best mate wear it so it was never a completely 'new' thing to me! Lol!
but yeah.... i know ive been putting it off for a few years bcoz i felt i was too young.. (as my prnts hve been encouraging me for a while now) but this year i thought ok.... i think im ready 4 it... so ther went the big step.... PAUSE... (id been wearing it in umrah 4 a few years)... so wen i cme bac, it was just lyk a continuation really... it wsnt lyk actully 'putting it on'.. if u get wat i mean!?
Soo, Allhumdulillah, i think Allah has made it very easy for me and i have to be very grateful as i know of a few people who wud like to wear it but dnt coz of fam. and stuff... so yeah, and my freinds and stuff have been quite good abwt it... evn thw its xpected seen as they r muslim! lol!
But yeah, advising anybody, niqab is a big step... smetyms its harder for sme then others. But its a great step ive cum to realise (afta a few days!)... it just feels so secure and safe.... maybe thats just me... but its a nice feeling... like you know your pleasing you Lord.
coming to the point of fard and not fard etc.... i believe that its waajib... or at least very very very emphasised in islam... and that evn if it wasnt, its a step closer to Allah... so why not wear it? why not get closer to your creator? but thats just IMO... evry1 has a right to ther own...
Hope it helps!!
"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt" - Augustus Waters
Jazakallah!!!
"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt" - Augustus Waters
So I guess you go to an Islamic school?
When I started yr7, there was a girl who used to wear a niqab to sixth form, but I'm pretty sure she had to take it off indoors and would put it back on as soon as she left.
Believing it's wajib gives it a lot of importance...
I think someone said it can be fardh, wajib, or just good depending on the circumstance?
Any evidence for either of the stances?
I saw a niqaabi waiting for her food at a take away today and I just wondered how she would eat her food in public with her niqab on lol
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Alhumdulillah sister!
Its so nice to see that you made such an active step in gaining taqwa and a feeling of closeness to Allah (SWT)and I do agree that it is a big step! I suppose since the transition was gradual and supporetd by family it made it all alot easier for you. I was asking whether it was fard because funnily enough, Ive always thought of it as something close to wajib myself and have been thinking about implenting niqab into my life for a while now. I told by alot of people that it wasnt fard and obligatory at all which did discourage me, but despite this I could still see the wisdom behind it and have always been drawn tawords gaining more knowledge about the subject InshaAllah. I just didnt have enough info or knowledge Ie hadiths, and explanations from the Quran so I wanted to be guided to the right places and learn more about wearing the niqab, but I know my family may freak out lol!
Not because they dont want me to please Allah (SWT) or dont want be to be a good muslim - Really its totally not anything like that, but they think people may start treating me differntly or start being abusive towards me since its always so dramatised in our local community. I on the otherhand believe that if its something u believe in, I dont care what other people may misinterperate about me or my life *just* because of a peice of clothing? I dont think its that much of a problem anyway as I know allot of sisters who dont get any problems, but some do as its just some ignorant folk who like to joke around or point the finger! BUt thats the case for any peice of religous clothing, and with the intensely negative image that is constantly portrayed in the media about muslim women and their supposed *subjigated* rights, even things like wearing hijab get picked out and discriminated against nowadays.
As a hijabi myself its happend only a few times, but Ive found that most ppl are generally just curious and want to understand why we wear what wear- which I dont mind at all, but in fact enjoy because its just another oppertunity to spread Dawah and guide others to the truth!
Its so weird because alot of people insist that 'I' dont have any rights and that im oppressed because of what I wear, but yet its them who are consiously subjigated and discriminating women for covering their faces. If I coverd my face in makeup or cosmetics to conceal my face so others will accept me (often forced to `look' good by societal pressures) I wouldnt be picked on, but if I wear the niqab out of love for my Creator suddenly Im the one who is oppressed? I find it so funny how they justify banning or inprisoning women for covering their faces in place like France?
Yep.
Thats how you liberate women.
By criminalising them.
;/
But you know what, after everything being said and done to put it simply- Id rather dress modestly to gain the pleasure of our Perfect, Supreme and Mighty Creator any day than conform to the mere musings and fashion rules set by imperfect man.
May Allah (SWT) all aid our struggles to become closer to him, to break free from Jahaliyah and step into the light of Islam with the upmost sincerity, peace and conviction.
Lets pray for others to be given guidance and knowledge to the truth about Islam and ask that we can all unite under our universal common ground, as well as stregnthening the muslim Ummah as a whole.
Ameen.
Yup... an islamic school it is... private muslim girls school to be precise!
Hmm... right now im reallie busy, but im sure to get back to the topic on fard, wajib or just good insha'Allah when i have some time for research!!
Lol... its not that hard to eat in niqaab!!! though people do think it looks funny! ice-cream is the worst!!!
*grin*
"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt" - Augustus Waters
My non-Muslim friend goes to me today "I want to see your hair, are you going to wear your headscarf when you go to uni? "
I was like yeah and she was like "oh really? Oh that's good though" lol
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
If she's a girl, then I don't see anything stopping you from showing her. But if it was a guy then that's kind of pervy.
“Before death takes away what you are given, give away whatever there is to give.”
Mawlana Jalal ud Din Rumi
A guy friend of mine once asked to see my hair, after I refused he goes (genuinely confused) 'Why not, I've seen it before' =\ lol
Have I told you guys this story? Seems like I have. Hmm..
Jihad of the Nafs (The Struggle of the Soul)
I cant remember reading it before.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
He did, what were you two getting upto exposing each others hairs???
Kewl, make sure the flap is open before you try to bite your burger.
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