The title is a little misleading if I’m perfectly honest. But we’ll (by that I use myself in third person) discuss it anyway.
Have you ever felt the need to say something over and over because you can’t get over it? I have (all the time really). So today during a little texting conversation that I have going, I mentioned something that, on the one hand I wanted to but on the other I wanted to keep it hidden. Now this thing that I said was actually something of my own. It was my secret (if you could call it that). I think that the people who shared this ‘secret’ or rather ‘thing’ with me all understood it to different levels.
And today I felt like when I told this new person, someone finally understood a part that no one else did. Another one of my friends and my sister all knew details of it, intimate details which I couldn’t, even if wanted to, explain to this new person because, the new person wasn’t there, taking each step with me to fully understand them. I appreciate the people that were there – so much.
I know I’m probably not making a lot of sense but the main point is that sometimes people that you least expect can ‘get you’ and it’s scary. Well today was a little scary for that reason. Now I can’t bring myself to reread some of the texts I received because well it’s a little too close for comfort and I’m guessing that it also worked vice versa. We ‘got’ each other. We understood.
The funny thing is that I don’t exactly regret blurting it out but now that it’s out there it seems that anything could happen. It’s just too unpredictable. On the other hand it was nice to know that this person understands – (although to a different level to the others, I’ve mentioned that I know).
I think that sometimes we have to share otherwise we’ll be miserable. However I am cautious as to who I tell and what I tell them. Nothing annoys me more than things about me being whispered around to every Lana, Anna, and Fontana (The Princess Diaries), I mean can’t you just ask me straight? Gosh!
Anywayy!
By talking about the same thing over and over, I’ve found that most people get bored or annoyed or angry even. But certain things are such that you have to have your fill of talking about it (in reality it doesn’t really help because only Allah (swt) – I find – can actually give your heart peace) but during this time of talking about the thing I told the new person (oh my god I’m confusing) I found one person listened all the time and was there too. I really appreciate that person.
It’s weird how things can connect you, (like in Heroes ‘We are all connected’ – you remember Mohinder saying that?) it’s weird but also amazing. I’m glad that someone understands (that certain part of it) and I’m glad I had someone there to take the steps with me, to listen and give advice when I needed it.
Because, well, nothing weighs on us so heavily as a secret. [Jean de La Fontaine]
Comments
You know you really shouldnt write the title first. Thats twice now that ive got excited "yay! Grinno's writen another blog
" {opens page AND its empty 
}
Anyway subject at hand; yep its great when you have people who understand you and you can share things with. Do you think people should learn to trust more? (I have trust issues)
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
This is always a worry - it is no longer under your control only, whatever it is that you told the people.
The other question is who you are willing to open up to. It either has to be someone who you trust implicitly and completely, or a random stranger who you will never cross paths with again (this may be considered a slightly selfish option as you burden others with your issues, but it can be needed sometimes).
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
TPOS - I know, i know, it's just because i'll run out of time otherwise!
I think that people are prone to stabbing you in the back which is why i keep certain things to myself (i know it's hard to believe but i do). Personally I wish i could trust more people but i've been burned too many times and thus people have yet to prove themselves worthy.
People in general should trust more however - by that i mean like a old lady being helped across the road without feeling scared of being attacked (i did this when i was younger) or a baby's crying, someone comfort it and not feel totally awkward. Although i don't know, perhaps this is a issue of people caring for each other more?
You - Each person has a different level of trust (i quote the 'new person' mentioned in my Blog) and now i think it's pretty unlikely to trust one person with everything (i'm talking out of family - i find trusting my sister's are one good way to go as they'll never, well leave - annoying though when they're sick of hearing it when i haven't finished sigh)
And yes it is easier to talk to a stranger. So any volunteers? .. Hey, hey! where did you all go?
Jihad of the Nafs (The Struggle of the Soul)
yep ofcourse but thats a different kind of trust than what i meant
or maybe it is just caring but then you can't show that you care if you don't trust (sometimes?) like helping out a stranger, both people would require some level of trust to get the job done.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
these days you get taken for a peadophile ever so easily...
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
I know, it's horrible.
So do you lot trust anyone completely?
Jihad of the Nafs (The Struggle of the Soul)
mum and dad?
but thats with the amount of info you let them know.
dunno really. just tell people problem when and to who it seems more appropriate/who would understand.
i talk a lot, but its mostly nonsense, dont open up to much. Right now, trying to pick myself up from a big let down. Dont feel it's worth opening to people anymore, what can they do? stand around feeling awkward and thinking "why did she choose me and NOW?"
...
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
I know what you mean which is why to find people that genuinely don't mind listening (or reading) is hard. I used to want to start up an Agony Aunt thing (this was before uni). But I realised that most people need (or want!) free advice which well to run properly would be pretty difficult to fund.
Jihad of the Nafs (The Struggle of the Soul)
Don't the Samaritans do that? Or Muslim Youth Helpline?
They probably require volunteers though and sponsors for funding.
As for trust... I have trusted people and I have not been let down.
I wonder if I have ever been let down...
... Saying that, it sometimes requires courage to admit things even to yourself, let alone to others and in general here I would lack courage.
So it would not be a matter of trust, but of courage. I be cowardly.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
aww thats so great
hmmm
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
i dont mind listening. i dont know if people feel comfortable talking to me. I wish they did. Cant do much if they dont.
why am i talking in small sentences...its that blog..made me selfcontious...
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
its the 6th of september 2010 and still no new blog
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Lol, yesterday was spent focusing on a worthy cause InshaAllah
Jihad of the Nafs (The Struggle of the Soul)
talking about trusting people. Today coming back from college (COLLEGE :O) This black ,elderly lady who lives a few houses down mine called out to me. (Ok, she lives in the house, coz she was standing in the house, never seen her before)
She seemed not to be able to speak english properly and was trying to communicate with signs etc.. I understood that there was some noise and she wanted me to see to it.
OK ALERT ALERT ALERT STRANGE WOMAN ASKING ME TO COME IN HER HOUSE
^this is the state of society today...
BUT i did go in, her firealarm had gone off, I didnt want to touch anything in case I got accused of breaking stuff (this particular neighbour has actual CCTV stuff, so i thought..hmm..no messing about here..) SO i told her that i'll go call my dad and come back.
Walk down the road, go in, Dad's not in. Well..I wasnt going to stay home while this lady was waiting outside (yeah, she was standing on the outside of the house, i think she got tired of the noise)
SO ANYWAY, i go back, and actually WALK completely into the house (yeah..i didnt step wholly in the house the first time, in case she was a pimp trying to enslave me and close the door on me as soon as i was through) there i have a GOOD look at the fire alarm. My guess? She must have cooked somethign which set off the alarm, but it being a posh alarm you cant just stand under the smoke detector and wake a book (i didnt try it) It looked like you needed to reset the alarm by inserting the pin. Ok..how do i explain this to the lady? Well..i tried..and i hope someone who actually know the pin came soon after.
I could have hugged that woman for not being an evil person wanting to harm me and for choosing ME out of all the people in the world (ok...fine..our road is pretty quiet and i was like, the only passerby..BUT STILL) she choose ME, the muslimah, jilbaabi (
) to help her!!
you know there are some old people that look like they're jealous of the youth, and then there are old people who look GOOD old. She was one of the latter case. I felt like inviting her over to my house until the noise stopped. I just wished it was MY house and not my parents'...
ANYWAY should have been a whole blog of its own eh?
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Couldn't you have invited her anyway?
Jihad of the Nafs (The Struggle of the Soul)