Q. Are Muslim students allowed to sit in Sex Education lessons? What does Islam say about Sex Education in general?
Answer by Shaykh Salim Ghiza
In the Name of Allah, The Most Beneficent and Merciful.
Sex education is a very important part of life and all Muslims who are of marriageable age must learn what is permissible with their partners and what isn’t. However, the purpose of sex education in schools in the UK is not about teaching children how to refrain from sex until they are married but they teach them how to practice safe sex. As sex before marriage is not permissible in Islam this sort of education to the children is also not permissible and therefore Haram.
The main purpose of today’s sex education classes is to try and reduce teenage pregnancies and therefore the emphasis is on how to enjoy sex without getting pregnant and this is obviously not what Muslim children should be learning.
The main content in today’s school sex education lessons which deem it impermissible for Muslims are:
- Promotion of sex before marriage and the condoning of such acts.
- Showing videos of nudity, exposing bodies of men and women which is impermissible in Islam.
- Mixed classes of young men and women discussing such issues together, therefore no shame barrier between the sexes at such a vital and most dangerous crucial stage of their lives.
The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said:
“Modesty is a part of faith.” [Sahih al-Bukhari & Sahih Muslim]
The issue of nudity and watching someone else have sex is very clear in Islam. It is without doubt prohibited. The Prophet sallallahu alalyhi wasallam said:
“A man should not look at the concealed parts of another man, and a women should not look at the concealed parts of another women.” [Tirmidhi]
Therefore with the above issues it is evident that Muslim parents should not allow their children to partake in such lessons. When parents cannot boycott lessons then they would have to allow the children to sit in the lessons but the parents should speak to the Mosques and ask them to counteract the teaching in schools by teaching the children the Islamic perspective on such issues.
Sending your child to Islamic schools is an option but the topic of sex education may be made compulsory in faith schools so still may not be avoided.
However, the problem will not disappear unless adequate and alternative Halal actions are taken where the government would be satisfied that enough is done by the Muslim communities to educate their youth.
The alternative to the above is for classes of sex education to be held in the Madrassa system whereby boys and girls are separated and the same gender teachers teach the youth (above the age of puberty) the following aspects;
- Reasons why sex is forbidden before marriage.
- Consequences in the world and the hereafter if fornication is committed before marriage.
- What is permissible and what is not between husband and wife.
If this is done then not only will the Muslims be addressing the topics which are concerning the government and society but we will also genuinely educate our youth on aspects that are absolutely vital to their future lives, without them seeing the need to go elsewhere.
Mosques and Madrassas need to get a grip with the challenges of modern days and begin to teach sex education lessons due to the wrong teachings at schools.
When something wrong is being taught one should try and avoid it, but if this is not possible then the right aspect of it has to be taught. One cannot just ignore it and allow schools to continue teaching wrong as this would mean that as a society we have allowed the wrong to be taught and not responded with the correct answers.
This would be an act of sin and all people responsible from parents to teachers to Mosque committee members and Imams would be sinful. Most Mosques and Madrassas at present do not teach sex education at present but once sex education classes at faith schools become obligatory they will have to react.
Comments
Just updated the formatting of this article.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
I think here, the shaykh has it wrong.
No mosque "school" (and I am using that term lightly - they don't really teach kids anything do they?) would EVER teach about sex! Just think about the scandal. "Stafirula, the imam is talking about sex. We need a new Imam, who know how to respect the mosque. And not bring up these issues."
knowing about sec does not mean one will practice it before marriage. I remember there being a two minute pep talk in biology about "lifestyle choices", marriage and all that.
It is - but (I think) parents can opt their kids out of the lessons.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Oh yeah, we need an Imam who's going to brush the issues under the carpet, become uptight at the word sex, isolate the youth and pretend that everything's OK. Yeah, right! No wonder why we can't relate to some of the Imams. Surely we need someone who understands what we go through and someone who'll talk about it in a mature way? Problems like this don't go away, so what's the point in burrying your head in the sand, dreaming of everything being nice and rosy?
And parents need to be open and have dialogue with their kids, and not leave it to school, media, teachers and the Revival (it's done a fairly good job, but even Sajid Iqbal's only human). If they can't relate to you or feel that you can understand them then God help you! They need to know the reasons why sex outside of marriage is haram, and it goes more than the STI and pregnancy. If they feel Islam is a backward restraint then why should they follow it?
If you think that Muslims will not go off the straight and narrow, then think again and wake up! Because it IS happening! We can either address it properly and maturely or we can turn a blind eye. It's our choice. Which one's gonna work?
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
Salam!
Just a quick request... may i please get the answers for these questions. Jazak Allah Khair!
1. Reasons why sex is forbidden before marriage.
2. Consequences in the world and the hereafter if fornication is committed before marriage.
3. What is permissible and what is not between husband and wife
WS!
1. Does sexually transmitted diseases ring a bell? The more sexually active partners you have the more chances are that you will contract an STD. If everyone only had 1 partner each (i.e. in a marriage) then STDs would be alot less common and restricted in their spread. Thats one reason... off the top of my head i can think of atleast 5 more.
2. Allah (swt) commands in explicit and unequivocal words: (And come not near unto adultery. Lo! it is an abomination and an evil way) (Al-Isra’ 17: 32). Adultery in Islam is one of the most heinous and deadliest of sins. The Prophet (pbuh) said, “Whoever guarantees me that he will guard his chastity, I will guarantee him Paradise” (Al-Bukhari).
Hope that helps.
Back in BLACK
I can answer the first one. Seraphim's already addressed the STI and teen pregnancy issue, but the West can argue that we have condoms. But there's more to it than that. Islam teaches us to put the dialogue about the serious stuff and the anticipation before the sex and romance, that's what the pre-marriage talks are meant to be about.
It makes people appreciate their love life, it encourages dialogue (the lack of it is the reason why many marriges breadkdown) and it's a way of making sure that there's no messing people about, and that's an added advantage for the girls, because unfortunately some guys (not all) are not interested in commitment.
Hope that helps you.
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
You forgot about the bit about how its immoral.
Back in BLACK
Yes, its just wrong!!
5 years old is way too young! :shock:
they're gonna make more problems than they're gonna solve.
'Allah gives and forgives
Man gets and forgets' Baba Ali
http://halfDate.com
Yep, i agree with you.
The 5yr old will be thinking something like: "Well, i wasnt even thinking about it before. But i am NOW!" lol
Back in BLACK
But, most people in the West aren't going to buy that, are they?
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
The purpose of Sexd Ed shouldn't be to practice safe sex per se, because cheating and sleeping around can be safe sex sometimes.
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
I think kids should be aware of STDs and Pregnancy.
If they are not learning this from school, and their parents are too 'shy' or 'up-tight' to teach them, they will still learn about sex.
But it will be from their friends at school, older brothers and sisters or movies (normal hollywood and pornos).
That doesn't even begin to mention about the Fitnah-Factory that is the internet. I don't look at my junk-mail, but a curious 11 year old seeing a message from someone they don't know? Maybe they will onnocently click on it.
Its a sad state of affairs that has lead Britain to have the highest rate of teenage pregnancy in Europe, but I think more education on the topic will do more good than harm.
If you want to complain about something, complain about the orangina advert.
Don't just do something! Stand there.
Oh yeah, so do I. But they should also be discouraged from promiscuity, even if it's "safe". It's not polite to encourage a Muslim or Christian or religious child to have safe sex without any regard to religious beliefs.
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
The government announced its intention to make Sex & Relationship Education (SRE) compulsory in all state schools in England and Wales from the age of five years old.
The implication for our childrens’ Islamic identity is grave - we need to act now.
We have started a campaign, which seeks to capture the voice of the Muslim community’s opposition to these plans. We are doing this through a paper and online petition. We have over 6,000 signatories so far and are targeting 50,000 – 100,000.
At the present time, parents have the right to withdraw their children from SRE lessons delivered through PSHE (Personal, Social, Health and Economic) Education classes. It is uncertain whether this right will remain, but we are making the case for it to be retained. We are also building a case for governing bodies (with a membership of Parent, Community and Local Authority representatives) to have the right to mould SRE classes, taking into account the backgrounds and values of the pupils they serve.
We would like you to:
Sign the online petition and encourage others to do so:
http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/against-the-imposition-of-statutory-sre.html
Take the paper petition and get as many people to sign it as possible,
Download here: SRE Petition
Contact your local masjid and ask them to request everyone to sign the petition after the Jummah prayers.
Organise a seminar on this subject for parents so that we can discuss the current SRE policies and the implications of the future proposals.
Read the online report - Online Report
Or Download as a PDF:
Report PDF
Forward this message to your email distribution lists.
May Allah reward your efforts.
JazakAllahu khairan
Wassalam
Yusuf Patel
http://sreislamic.wordpress.com
sreislamic@ btinternet.com
07883 027 067
I think governing bodies and schools should consider religious views when giving Sex Ed lessons.
“Before death takes away what you are given, give away whatever there is to give.”
Mawlana Jalal ud Din Rumi
@ Yusuf Patel - I think sex education in school should be compulsory - but not at that young an age (at that age it should not even be taught on a non-compulsory basis IMO).
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Assalamualaikum 'You',
Can I ask why you think it should be made compulsory?
At what age should this be the case?
What should be taught at that age?
Interested to hear your views.
Wassalam
Yusuf
In my opinion it should be made compulsory because most Muslim kids won't learn this of their parents or local mosques, but it should be taught at about 10 or 11 around the time a child hits puberty rather than have a kid know all about sex at 5 years old!
SMILE! its charity
Assalamaualaikum,
JazakAllahu khairan for your response.
What is a greater risk to our children?
(b) Them growing up without being taught SRE at school.
That being said, I believe our children should be taught Sex Education that is age appropriate, morally based and built solidly on an Islamic basis.
Parents are responsible for this and with all aspects of parental responsibility cannot be devolved to schools.
Parents don't teach this.
I fully agree.
What if parents who withdrew their children from SRE classes had to provide an alternative avenue through which this is taught?
In that case the values of our children would be protected and parents would be forced to cooperate with other parents and Islamic institutions to provide this.
That is why as part of our campaign we are planning to write Islamically grounded materials to teach in SRE lessons either in schools for children withdrawn or in the madrassah.
What do you think?
Wassalam
Yusuf
http://SREIslamic.wordpress.com
Please don't forget to sign our online petition.
Salaam,
Problem is, kids are in their nature curious.
If schools don't teach them, other kids will. And what other kids tell them about it is probably a lot worse and possibly more damaging than what a school will tell them about it, because at least a school is likely to be accurate.
And age 5 is not that out-of-this world. You have no idea WHAT they are being taught at this age, I doubt it is too explicit.
Out of all major religions, Islam has the most healthy, open approach to sex. Sex is not seen as 'dirty' or 'evil' like it is in some forms of Christianity. Sex within a married relationship is a form of worship.
Almost all my non-Muslim friends have either had a baby outside of marriage or they (or their partner) have gone through an abortion. Surely if they'd had better education it wouldn't have made this situation worse?
Don't just do something! Stand there.
Assalamualaikum brother,
I have seen some of the materials they show and teach at 5-7. The schools that show a video about masturbation to five year olds, the explicit terminology, the lack of clear boundaries or morality which underpins this. With all due respect we've done a considerable amount of research into this area.
There is a difference between the Islamic concept of sex not being dirty and impinging hayaa at such an age. Why do we want schools to take over the responsibility of parents. If parents don't teach it they should find alternative avenues to teach them Islamic moral values. That is why we are designing an alternative curriculum that can be used in schools and our masaajid to inculcate Islamic values in our children. With all due respect you seem very laid back by the thought of the effect on children of this value free education, do you have children yourself?
JazakAllah brother
Yusuf