Assalamu-Alaikum
A very happy new year to all, and may this year be filled with love, laughter, knowledge and may you get brighter and older as years go by lol
neways many people make new years resolutions and such on. I've made a decision in my life. only 2nights ago, I realised the importance of my family.
Im very arrogant and stubborn, always have been and would've been but hope i dont stay stubborn.
during the christmas times, I nearly got killed, literally. It was due to family problems.
Anyways I always get told off and ignore it, and carry on doing what i do. Sometimes i get told off for things i dont even know i've done or supposed to have done. Ma anger problem doesn't help either but its life.
I realised how i used to be, how i used to read islamic books and seek knowledge and so on.
I got side tracked and started doing less of seeking ilm. Peace was never there, i found peace with haram things, which islam prohibits. I lost my senses at times and then felt guilty but it didnt stop me from going back to those awkward ways.
I am a muslim by name but not by ma actions. I prayed but my prayers wern't being concentrated on. I made dua but not for anyone or myself. I felt ashamed, as muslims we shud make dua for our fellow muslims, family and for ourselves but i didn do any of it.
people remimded me of how i didn have a mom and how she would've felt if she were here.
Things and people made me realise how blessed i am to be born in a muslim family, as there are many non muslims out there seeking the truth but im so blessed to be born with the truth.
I knew i was abusing it and taking it for granted, but i never knew the consequences. Its true when people say that isla brings peace and tranqulity. Whenever i went off track, i only found hurt, unease and other discomforts.
2days ago, i decided that IM A MUSLIM but only by name, i haven't reached to the stage where i can be classified as a muslim by nature or by my acts and way of living.
I have started to read books and, am trying to stay away from distractions. I pray that ALLAH SWT helps me and guides me in this spiritual journey of mine and that HE blesses the Muslim Ummah to seek and to continue seeking knowledge as its our duties to do so.
pls make dua for me to become a better muslim and complete what i have intended to do, Insha-Allah
also share thoughts of events and accounts non muslims coming to Islam and other thoughts you have.
Also pls give advice on what ever you like.
JazakAllah for taking the time to read this.
wassalamz
Dont stress so much Sis, your not a Muslim in name only.
Your a regretful Muslims - one who feels ashamed of the state of your soul.
Such Muslims are rare - and are the kind of Muslims that Allah loves best.
If you feel regretful of your actions, past or current state - then your half way of the path of making yourself a better Muslims...
Plus, Allah loves the regret of a sinner than the sajda (worship) of a practising Muslim...
Salaam
That was quite a moving account! I think your story in not an uncommon one, it is actually one faced by a lot of us Muslims, particularly in the western world.
My experiences, ermm well what I personally found was that in my opinon (and this may seem obvious) our imaan can become tested and inconsistent. I mean there were times a few years ago when I stopped praying 4 a while and stuff but now, Alhamdulillah I have re-discovered Islam, and it feels really good. I think I will stay on this straight path now, I hope Allah (swt) helps me with that.
I feel it is important to look at other peoples experiences. You must have heard of youtube.... well there is a lot of good stuff on there, I mean videos of people, reverts or converts what ever u want to call them... PEOPLE THAT HAVE COME TO ISLAM!!!! Some who were atheists b4. Mashallah. I dont think they will mind me posting the links, I mean after all when they posted their videos their intentions were 4 people to see them and understand their stories. here are some of the video's. If you want to see all of the videos of the particular user just click on their name on the top right hand part of the screen (e.g. 1 users name is jihadmeansstrruggle). Most of the converts are women:
(These videos are for everyone to view!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwYjfDk97TU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Go5lTfFZGkE&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9FNai9FlMps
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AY6hE0Qfo2A
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XU3SREbRwrQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ubefm7EC_0o&feature=related
And finally... some brothers!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQqdAV5vs60&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ar_0mSqCM64
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4GHmBhlhadE
I could go on all day posting links but I think thats enough 4 now.
I hope you find them inspiring.
The media, government, tried to blow us, but they can't out the flame, or doubt the name.
No such as the perfect practicing Muslim and whoever says they are well they are just chatting bubbles.
There is not point in rushing into doing everything at once ie pray all 5 prayers that Islam, give up music etc, chances are that you will go back to your old habits. Take it one step at a time and be patient. Have a one to one with God every night pray from the bottom of your heart and trust me Allah (swt) will give you the strength.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
takes a lot of courage to realise ur own shortcomings Sis, well done on ya
and a lot to say all that on here
but never despair of Allah SWT's mercy....
[b]
.[/b]The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
Theres really no such thing as a perfect muslim. We all stray from the path once or twice. How can you know the light when you havent seen the darkness?
God loves all muslims, no matter how bad they are.
Ignore what people say; they have a tendancy to talk cr@p. There was this one occasion where i was being lectured to by some elderly woman, althoug she didnt know what she was going on about I remained polite and calm and just pretend i wasnt listening.
You must control your anger... patience, you must learn patience.
Back in BLACK
JazakAllah for your comments and advice.
I know that we aren't perfect but we can try our best to be practising muslims and i want to do that. I want to take it one step at a time and am always repenting for my deeds
ma anger sometimes gets the best of me and i need to work on that, any advice on how?
also could you recommend any books that may be useful to me at this stage
Learn To Love The People Who Are Willing To Love You At Present. Forget The People In The Past & Thank Them For Hurting You, Which Lead You To Love The People You Have Right Now..
http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Be-Sad/dp/9960850447
excellent, inspiring advice.
Don't just do something! Stand there.
^ JazakAllah for that.. Insha-Allah will try to get hold of it, read the review and seems interesting.
Im currently reading a Book called
'SIGNS OF THE END TIMES IN SURAT AL-KAHF' By Harun Yahya
Its very gud
Learn To Love The People Who Are Willing To Love You At Present. Forget The People In The Past & Thank Them For Hurting You, Which Lead You To Love The People You Have Right Now..
I have the same problem. The best thing is to just walk away/remove yourself away from the situation. That way you wont be tempted to say something you will regret.
...7 minutes to go
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
same here, i think i need to go on some anger managment course!
I think praying has made me more peacefull sometimes i lose it, they say it is caused by the devil.
Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...
Anger is something both the Shariah and the sound intellect regard as generally blameworthy. This is why the Beloved of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) told the one who sought his counsel, "Don't get angry," repeatedly. [Bukhari, from Abu Hurayra (ra)]
The scholars recommend many measures to deal with anger, including:
1. Turning to Allah, and seeking refuge in Allah, from Satan.
When a man got angry in front of the Prophet (saw), he told his companions, "I know some words that would make his anger leave, if he said them. They are, Audhu Billahi Minashaitan ir Rajeem ('I seek refuge in Allah from Satan'). [Bukhari] Imam Mawardi said in Adab al-Dunya wa al-Din that one should remember Allah when angry, for this leads to fear of Allah, which directs him to obey Him and restrain one's anger by returning to proper manners. Allah Most High said, "And remember Allah when you are heedless." [Qur'an, 18: 24]
Turn to Allah in supplication, in order to control one's anger. One should turn to Allah with one's heart and tongue, asking him to rid one of anger, and all other lowly traits. If you can do this using the supplications of the Beloved of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace), it is even more beloved to Allah. A'isha (ra) reports that, "The Prophet entered while she was angry. So he rubbed the tip of my nose and said, 'My little A'isha. Say, 'O Allah, forgive my sin, remove the anger in my heart, and protect me from Satan.' (Allahumma 'Ghfir li dhanbi, wa adhhib ghaydha qalbi, wa aajirni min ash-shaytan)" [Ibn al-Sunni, as mentioned in Barkawi's Tariqa al-Muhammadiyya]
2. Silence.
said, "If you get angry, stay silent." [Ahmad]
Do not say anything when angry, lest it contravene the Sacred Law, or go against your personal or social interests. The Messenger of Allah
3. Change your physical posture.
is reported to have said, "If you get angry while standing, sit down.... If you get angry while sitting, lie down." The wisdom in this is that it prevents one from doing that which one's anger would have made one do in that posture.
The Prophet
4. Perform ritual ablutions
informed us that anger is from Satan, and he was created from fire, so we should extinguish anger with ritual ablutions. [Abu Dawud]
The Prophet
5. Follow the counsel of the Best of Creation (Allah bless him & give him peace)
His repeated counsel for the one who sought advice was, "Do not get angry." [Bukhari]
6. Remember the great reward mentioned by Allah for those who control their anger.
"And vie with one another for forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as are the heavens and the earth, prepared for those fear Allah (al-muttaqin); Those who spend (of that which Allah has given them) in ease and in adversity, those who control their wrath, and are forgiving toward mankind; and Allah loves the good. And those who, when they do an evil deep or wrong themselves, remember Allah and implore forgiveness for their sins. And who forgives sins but Allah?..." (Qur'an, 3: 133-135)
7. Remember that true strength is not physical, but spiritual and moral.
said, "The strong one is not one who can out-wrestle others. Rather, the strong one is one who can restrain themselves when angry." [Bukhari & Muslim] Imam Kumushkhanawi, the great 19th Century hadith expert and Naqshabandi spiritual guide, explained that, this is because, "...the one who can control himself when his anger swells up has overcome the most powerful of his enemies and the worst of his adversaries.
The Messenger of Allah
8. Remember the example of the Prophet (saw).
with others, and did not get angry unless the anger was for the sake of Allah. The examples of this from his life are numerous. The scholars say that every Muslim should strive to read about the life and example of the Prophet 
daily.
Remember the clemency, forbearance, and easy-going nature of the Prophet
9. Remember the harms of anger.
Be aware of the harms of anger, which include falling into that which Allah deems impermissible of words or actions, and acting in a way unbefitting of a believer. Would we act like this if we were aware that Allah sees all our actions? Would we act like this in the presence of the Prophet (saw)?
Imam Ibn Hajar al-Haytami (Allah have mercy on him) counted getting wrongly angry as one of the first major sins in his Zawajir.
10. Remember that anger is generally animalistic.
Be aware that one resembles animals, more than noble humans, when in a state of anger. [Barkawi, Tariqa]
anger is a very dangerous charateristic
im in control of mine at most times, but ive realised with close ones...i lose my control over it. im not that bad, but for some reason, when its someone close, your more likely to steam off. and of course, make up afterwards, as its easier.
anger is best controlled by meditation, dhikr, fikr, thinking twice before reacting, and keeping good company
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
anger is caused by the shaytaan..
to get rid of it, the best things we can read are Ta'awuz.. whic his Aa'uzu billahi minashay twaa nirajeem.. and also, the 4th Kalima.. which starts like "Laa illaha illalahu wahdahu laa shareeqala huu lahul mulqu..."
and trust me.. it works.. because these ^ are like stings to the devil..
also, anouther peice of advice.. walk away.. and calm down.. dont get urself in to such a sitution where walking away is not an option.. being steamed up and angry doesnt help remove the situation..
and last but not least..
think about ur actions b4 u do anything..
advice from a 16 year old sister
wasalaamz all
xx
If you desire Allah to be persistent in granting you the things you love,, be persistent in doing the things that he loves - (Imaam Ahmad Ibn Hanbal)
Dont play the age game it doesnt work with these lot trust me.
Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...
JazakAllah everyone for your advice.
I've been told that if ur angry whilst standing you shud sit and if your angry whilst suitting you shud lie down, apparantly it helps to calm you down and stops you from doing anything if you were in the position whilst you were angry.. if that makes sense.. wat do you think?
And could someone pls give me some info on Khadir AS
Learn To Love The People Who Are Willing To Love You At Present. Forget The People In The Past & Thank Them For Hurting You, Which Lead You To Love The People You Have Right Now..
i believe thats true
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
its a hadith so you cant go wrong.
seen, i didnt kno it was a hadith sum1 told me but thank you for letting me kno
Learn To Love The People Who Are Willing To Love You At Present. Forget The People In The Past & Thank Them For Hurting You, Which Lead You To Love The People You Have Right Now..
sounds like that sort of practice is for those who cant control themselves, im sure most of u guys dnt see the need to sit or lie down in order to calm urselves down.
I'm glad you think so highly of us!
The media, government, tried to blow us, but they can't out the flame, or doubt the name.
That response is a little silly and patronising, assuming you aren't superhuman or a Zen master. Sometimes situations or the way people are behaving can be very frustrating, and if you don't want to express that or leave the room, simply standing up or sitting down might be a very useful device for re-establishing one's calm. I know that certain company, such as if my friends accommodate louts, can chip away at my generally persistent good temper. It is worth trying if ever you feel the need.