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because islamically they are not required to. the men are the providers and the womens job is to look after the household and bring up the kids.
its also about what the couple want, the husband may want the wife to sit at home and teach the kids etc.
My mum was brought up in this county, studied in higher education and worked in the NHS for about 5/6years even after marriage with young kids.
It was the responsibility of 4kids that made her choose to stay at home.
The beauty of Islam, is that its a woman's choice weather she should work or sit at home (as long as her family is looked after) - however whatever she chooses to do, she shouldnt be condemned for it.
And IF she does choose to stay at home and bring up her children - whilst society may condemn her for 'sponging' of her husband. In the eyes of Allah, her actions are equivalent to doing Jihad.
As true as that is. Its also BS.
I can imagine the wife staying home taking care of the kids... ONCE YOU ACTUALLY HAVE KIDS. But until then you can atleast contribute to the running of the household.
Instead of expecting the guy to do everything. Ofcourse he's going to want to earn as much as he can. But having another person earning an income is alot better. You'll get more coming in which means you've also got more to put away for a rainy day.
I tire of this, I've said all I want on the subject.
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Its not just what some women expect.
Its also what God expects from men, which is to be the financial providers of their family. It is one of Islamic 'rights' of a wife. (and thats also why men get more inheritence than women from their parents).
On a personal note, I cant sit at home - daily shopping, guests, cooking, cleaning and TV makes me brain dead - I intend to work for as long as I can (but not when my kids are at home), I didnt study for so long and get a degree and go through training for it to go to waste...and I know a extra income would make a difference.
However, at the same time its unfair to condemn women who sit at home, for they are only excercising their God Given right - which most def isnt BS.
i think what seraph is getting at is the fact that housework is nowhere near as difficult as it was throughout history, even up to as recently as 50 years ago.
imagine keeping a house clean when there's no hoovers or detergents. Imagine cooking dinner when there's no microwave or even oven.
Even to have a bath you have to build a fire to heat the water first.
plus there wasn't always schools around to 'look after' the kids for 6-7 hours each day.
I know that in britain, many women spent time, at home, making pots out of clay because there wasn't a homebase/woolworths to buy them from.
BUT, we don't live in the past, we live today. And while it might be your right, it doesn't necessarily make it acceptable (i don't think most women want to actually do this anyway unless they're from essex).
Don't just do something! Stand there.
Its funny how some Muslim women dont pray 5 times a day, cover up to some extent, gossip, backbite and lie but when someone asks them why they dont work they quote the Qur'an to them. If they are gonna use Islam as an excuse for not working then at least follow it ALL instead of picking bits that suit them.
I have worked hard for my degree not to mention the debt im in coz of it. There is no way im sitting at home and twiddling my thumps while hubby (thats if i can get married) is out working. If i decide to have kids then i would want to get back to work as soon as possible, part time while they are little and full time once they are in school. This whole housewife routine just don’t do it for me.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
Yaqub - do you think God didnt know that in the 21st Century modern technology would relieve women of some of the stresses associated with housework/bringing up kids?
Do you think that just cos managing a house is 'easier' today than it was 1400 years ago, women still wont get jihad-reward for bringing up their kids?
I cant believe that a woman who chooses to sit at home, bring up kids, manage the house, gets jihad level reward is 'unacceptable' to you.
One of the Islamic rights that wives has - is a right for their husband to provide for them, and one of the Islamic rights a husband has over his wife is for her to take care of the children/home.
Naz - its hilarious that you think that a woman that doesnt work, sits at home twiddling her thumps. Modern convenience may lesson some of pressures of housework - but a housewife needs to clean the house, cook meals, drop/pick up kids from school (if she has more than one kid at more than one school, than this takes longer) do the laundry, shopping, educate her kids, ironing, entertain guests, manage the finance, and emotionally 'be there' for all the members of her family on a daily basis - I dont think that can be achieved by 'twiddling your thumps all day.
The housewife routine may not be for you, it doesnt suit me either. However, unlike you I wouldnt condemn a woman for doing something that is respectable, not easy and highly rewarded by God.
spot on ms.
if anything, its more harder bringing up your kids nowadays, there is so much fitna around its unbelievable and to bring your kids up properly, is one hell of a mission. a lot of married couples have migrated to muslim countries because they fear their child from straying. a lot of housewife are really active in their communities as well, reg hold circles, events, teach quran so forth.
I think this argument is too one-sided why dont we get a brother representing the sisters?
Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...
Because the brother ain't a sister?
Real perks of my job? It pays the bills, leaves no headaches. allows me to function as a person.
and I got the next two weeks off.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
What i mean is that obviously the sisters views are going to be biased its nice when a brother is arguing for a sister or sister arguing for a brother.
Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...
thanks to modern technology cleaning the house doesn’t take long as it use to.
Depends on how big your family is. If you cook a lot you can refrigerate it and keep going for 2 or 3 days.
Tell them to get the bus thats what they are there for teaches one independence and to stand on their own two feet and face the big bad world.
You only have to load it which takes about 2 minutes. Take it out and bung it in the tumble dryer, another 2 mins. If you gonna put it outside on the line then depending on how many clothes you have takes about 5-10 min to hang.
you dont need to shop everyday. Ppl tend to do a big shop once a week then go round to the corner shop if they run out of milk and bread.
most kids come home from school and go mosque then come home and do their homework. If they get stuck they will come and find you.
again depends on how big the load is
you dont get guests coming to your house everyday. If you live in an Asian area then you probs will but thats the choice you made when you decided to live their so deal with it.
doesnt take long either.
I dont condemn all women that stay home. I dont condemn Muslim women whose husbands dont let them work. I dont condemn Muslim women who cant speak English and therefore cant work. I dont condemn women you are ill or disabled and therefore cant work. I do condemn Muslim women who are capable of getting a job and dont have any kids or grown children to look after and expect their husbands to fund their gucci bag and matching shoes!
If i was a bloke (trying really hard to imagine) and my wife to be told me that she expected me to provide for her forever and i knew that she was educated and had nothing physically wrong with her i would tell her to take a hike and find some other mug to tie the knot with.
Just because you dont work and you are there for your kids 24/7 dont make you mother of the year nor will your kids be perfect. I know a lot of women you chose not work because they wanted to raise their kids. There kids are exactly saints.
What if you husband dies and your dad is dead and you have no brother who is going to provide for you then. No one you just gonna have to get off your backside and support yourself.
ps if and when you do decide to get married then be sure to let your husband know before you marry him what your plans are for the future so he knows what he is letting himself in for poor man.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
I think there's a hadith that says a married couple should be like two hands: One washes the other. Take that to mean whatever you think...
Don't just do something! Stand there.
Loading, unloading the dishwasher and washing machine, hanging the washing, folding ironing, cooking, cleaning etc doesnt take 5mins either.
Thats an individual choice, most mums I know, rather their family ate fresh food daily.
Really? Even if they're five years olds in year one? Would they still be expected to catch the bus? Are you looking to teach 'independence' to kids aged 4-5 who attend nursury/reception for only 3-4 hours a day?
If the 5year olds in my class caught the bus/train daily. I'd call social services.
Education is a lifelong process - it doesnt stop at school and Mosque. A child needs to know how to dress, behave, eat, talk to people, entertain guests...they needed to be guided at every step of the way. Schools and Mosque doesnt teach that.
Thats intresting. I've personally met and heard of about 10guys within the last 6months who refused to get married to a girl cos she wasnt 'homely' enough, cos she wanted to work.
Not it doesnt. But working 24/7 not being there for your family and kids and expecting others to bring them up or educate them doesnt exactly make you mother of the year either. Over the past year I've referred two kids to social services cos the mother wasnt there to look after them, and they were left to fend for themselves.
In the unlikely event of that happening, I'm pretty sure in this country, there are more than enough facilities for a woman to look after herself.
Open your eyes and read my posts.
you have totally misunderstood what im saying, never mind.
Your right and im wrong..... now everyone is happy
getting back to the original topic.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
perks of my job
im my own boss (pretty much)....so day off or being somewhere important isnt a prob
downside
rarely a day off
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
When I go to court (which is a 5 minute walk, almost every day), I get to see this:
[url=http://img2.freeimagehosting.net/image.php?c6313a5643.jpg][img]http://im...
Don't just do something! Stand there.
funny topic
"ThiS WoRlD Iz A PrIsOn 4 A BeLiVeR AnD PaRaDiSe 4 A NoN-BeLiVeR.........."
-The refreshing honesty and uncorrupted innocence of children.
- Watching kids jump up and down and get insanely excited, just when their numbers add up.
-The food. :oops:
-The games.
-The opportunity to influnce young minds (today I banned kiss chase and MTV songs)
Whats Kiss Chase?
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