Reading Time

• Summary Transcript: ~3 minutes
• Full Transcript: ~22 minutes

Learning Objectives

• Explain the Importance of Humility in Learning:
  • Understand how humility allows learners to gain knowledge from various teachers.
  • Recognize the barriers that pride or shyness can create in the learning process.
• Identify the Key Qualities of a Good Teacher:
  • Treat students with care and guide them as one would their own children.
  • Aim to nurture students’ growth and support their success without seeking competition.
• Recognize Proper Etiquette for Teachers:
  • Avoid seeking financial rewards or compensation for teaching.
  • Correct students with sensitivity and avoid public scolding.
• Understand the Concept of Teaching for the Sake of Allah:
  • Emphasize teaching without expecting worldly gains.
  • Appreciate the sincerity in imparting knowledge solely for Allah’s pleasure.
• Demonstrate Sensitivity When Providing Advice:
  • Offer guidance in a gentle and supportive manner.
  • Avoid actions that could damage the student-teacher relationship.
• Assess the Appropriateness of Teaching Topics:
  • Evaluate the student’s level of understanding.
  • Select teaching topics that match the learner’s capabilities to prevent confusion.
• Appreciate the Diversity in Scholars’ Lifestyles:
  • Recognize that scholars may live varied lifestyles, from austere to comfortable.
  • Understand that righteousness is measured by living within halal boundaries, not by wealth.
• Explain the Role of the Heart in Righteous Behavior:
  • Describe the significance of a sound heart in guiding a person’s actions.
  • Highlight how a pure heart helps avoid doubtful matters and adheres to what is halal.
• Discuss the Potential Pitfalls of Knowledge Misuse:
  • Identify how seeking knowledge for personal gain or fame can lead to arrogance.
  • Discuss the importance of maintaining sincerity in the pursuit of knowledge.
• Apply Key Lessons to Personal and Educational Contexts:
  • Reflect on the qualities and etiquettes of a teacher.
  • Consider ways to incorporate these principles into one’s own teaching or learning practices.

Class Summary

As we seek knowledge, it is vital to understand the etiquettes and qualities that make a good teacher. Whether you are teaching or learning, these insights are essential to building a beneficial learning environment.

The Importance of Humility in Learning

One of the primary lessons is humility in seeking knowledge. You should not dismiss learning from someone based on their age, popularity, or specialty. Being too bashful or shy can also hinder your opportunity to ask important questions and gain wisdom. Humbling yourself as a learner allows you to benefit from various teachers regardless of their background.

Qualities of a Teacher

A good teacher treats students with care, similar to how a parent treats their children. The aim is to guide students to become even better than the teacher. A teacher’s success is not in competition but in fostering the success of others. For example, one prominent scholar, Sheikh al-Uthaymeen, would hold special sessions for students, creating a nurturing and motivating learning environment.

Teaching for the Sake of Allah

Teachers should not expect financial compensation or see their teaching as a favor to their students. Instead, they should view it as a privilege to have the students open their hearts and minds to them. Historically, scholars were supported by community endowments (awqaf), allowing them to teach sincerely for the sake of Allah. Today, teachers should strive to be self-sufficient or avoid expecting rewards from their students, if possible.

Providing Guidance and Advice

A teacher must offer advice generously and be sensitive when correcting students. Harsh criticism can damage the student-teacher relationship. Teachers should be mindful of their students’ understanding levels and avoid discussing complex or controversial topics with those who may not comprehend them fully. Imam Al-Shafi’i highlighted the importance of teaching at the appropriate level, ensuring that students are not overwhelmed or led astray.

Practicing What You Teach

The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned against teaching righteousness while neglecting to practice it oneself. While perfection is not required of teachers, striving to embody the principles they teach is crucial. This commitment to sincerity builds trust and sets a positive example for students.

Balance in the Scholar’s Life

There is no one standard for how a scholar should live. Some, like Imam Sufyan al-Thawri, believed in maintaining physical well-being to have the strength for worship and teaching, while others, like Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, endured more austere lifestyles. Wealth or comfort does not determine righteousness; what matters is living within halal boundaries and maintaining a grateful heart.

The Heart and Its Role in Knowledge

The discussion concludes with a reflection on the hadith of the Prophet (peace be upon him), which states: “In the body, there is a morsel of flesh; if it is sound, the whole body is sound, and if it is corrupt, the whole body is corrupt. Verily, it is the heart.” This highlights the significance of a sound heart in guiding a person to avoid doubtful matters and adhere to what is halal and haram.

Full Transcript Depriving Yourself of Learning

I will deprive you of learning from whom? Someone who’s not popular, someone who’s younger than you, someone who doesn’t have much knowledge but has a specialty in a certain area, for example. You might say, “Who is this person to listen to?” You never know, right? That would deprive people of learning. Hayaa or khajal, let’s say bashfulness, will deprive you of seeking knowledge from whom? Someone who’s too popular, from a public forum or platform, where you feel awkward going out there in public.

So, therefore, you deprive yourself of asking the right and proper questions. We need to make sure that, as we seek knowledge, we humble ourselves. No matter who the person is, we need to learn from them. We are probably going to learn something very useful and unique. Also, you need to make sure that when the opportunity opens up for you, do not shy away from it—just ask the questions.

Addressing Disruptions During the Session

If I may ask the sisters, inshallah, who have their children back with them and running around, to give the sisters who are listening the respect, inshallah, and move with your child to the “Mommy and Me” room. The same goes for the brothers; use the “Daddy and Me” room if your child is not sitting with you so everyone can enjoy the sessions, inshallah. Jazakumullah khair. So, please cooperate with all of us.

Qualities of the Teacher

Let’s continue, inshallah, with the session, by Allah’s grace. Now we are talking about al-mu’allim, the teacher. What are the qualities of the mu’allim? What are the etiquettes that a mu’allim should observe? We are on page number 33, inshallah. Bismillah. Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim. As-salatu was-salamu ala Rasool Allah.

Imam Ibn Qudama, may Allah have mercy on him, says these are the duties of the student. With respect to the teacher, he has duties as well. Among them, the following:

Gentleness and Care for Students

He must be gentle with his students and treat them like his own sons. He must not ask for money for teaching and must not expect reward or thanks. Let’s stop on this one, too.

So, the first thing he says is to be gentle and treat them like your children. What does that exactly mean? The relationship between a student and a teacher should be more like a fatherly experience. You teach them and care for them as if they are your children. What is our interest in our children? To make them better than us, to ensure they have the right guidance and the proper way of living. We would love to see our kids succeed and be better than us. When you treat all your students in the same way, you would love to see them succeed and become better than you.

Instead of competing with them, if someone shines and becomes much more knowledgeable, that’s not a reason for you to be jealous. Instead, you push them to do better, inshallah. I remember our Sheikh al-Uthaymeen had a very special monthly session with the students who lived in the dorm. I don’t know how many of you experienced that in his life. He had a special time that he spent with the students who stayed in the dorm on a monthly basis. I remember in the summertime, or at least in early fall, when the weather was still nice, we would go up to the roof, and he would have a session exclusively for the students in the dorm. He made sure that no one else was there, sneaking in. He would keep asking, “Is everybody here from the dorm, residents of the dorm?” If someone said, “Yes, Sheikh, I have a guest with me,” he would say, “No, out.”

This was a very special occasion and a very special time for these students. Subhanallah, when he talked, he used a different language—not the language you hear from him in front of the public. He would address us with the words, “My dear children,” and keep talking to us in topics you wouldn’t hear him discuss in public. For example, he would say, “Hey, the winter is coming; it’s going to get cold. If anyone needs winter clothes, let me know. Talk to Sheikh Al-Dahash, Abdulrahman Al-Dahash, and he will help you, inshallah.” It was such a beautiful experience.

I remember the first time I was there, I was crying. I thought, “Wow, this is so beautiful.” Subhanallah, sitting there among the students, being addressed in a different way, is such a motivation. It makes you want to learn more, excel, and not disappoint your teacher. You become motivated to do better because if he’s dedicating his time for you, you want to make him feel proud that you’re learning, benefiting, and advancing. Alhamdulillah rabbil alameen.

Not Taking Wages for Teaching

The second point Imam, may Allah have mercy on him, mentioned is that you shouldn’t take any wages or money for teaching. Keep in mind, this book was written in a time when the ulama were taken care of by the awqaf. Meaning, they didn’t have to ask people for money because the awqaf were established by many Muslims. They would dedicate some of their earnings and properties as awqaf. When they died, the money generated from these properties would serve specific areas in our deen, such as ulama, imams, scholars, teachers, students of knowledge, huffadh of the Qur’an, and so on.

This time, we don’t have it. As a result, if our ulama dedicate themselves to teaching without compensation, they are being challenged by trying to do both. Some might say, “But wait a minute, almost all our ulama in the past were also business people.” Abu Hanifa, may Allah have mercy on him, was a businessman, right? But not every alim was a businessman. It depends on culture and circumstances. But the standard rule is: If the alim can be self-sufficient without taking money from people, especially students, they should be. This way, they don’t feel obliged to compromise to appease the people paying them to teach.

In the case of our imams, they are covered, so they don’t have to ask students for payment. This is the meaning of the statement here. It’s a case-by-case situation, but it’s always the standard rule that if you can be free from seeking compensation for teaching people, you should go that route. May Allah keep us all sufficient with His mercy.

Teaching for the Sake of Allah Alone

Yes, keep going. Allah says, “He must teach for the sake of Allah alone. He must not see himself as doing a favor for the students. Rather, it is upon him to hold them in high regard for being people who have prepared their hearts to earn the proximity of Allah by planting the seeds of knowledge therein. They are like men who lend their lands to another for cultivation.”

Such a beautiful example he’s mentioning here. He says, “You don’t think you’re doing them a favor when you teach them. They are the ones giving you the favor of opening their hearts and their time for you to teach them. Their time is valuable. Their heart is valuable. Their minds are valuable. Now, they’re sacrificing all of this for you because they trust you.” That’s why you need to honor this; you need to respect that. So, whenever you teach anybody and they say, “I would like to listen to you,” don’t feel proud that now you get to teach this individual. No, you need to be happy and excited that you’ve been given the opportunity, a valuable opportunity, for this person to accept you as their teacher. That puts you in the right perspective and humbles you when dealing with your students.

You shouldn’t think that you’re doing them a favor by teaching. Rather, you accept that the favor is coming from them, giving you their hearts, minds, and lives to teach and guide them to Allah. It does not befit a teacher to ask for a reward except from Allah.

To the extent that the pious predecessors used to refuse any gifts from their students. As we described earlier, if you can free yourself from any wants or needs from your students, that is the best.

Granting Advice and Correcting Students

The teacher must not be stingy in granting advice. If a student shows bad character, he must express his disapproval indirectly, as much as he can. He must not scold him out loud, as this makes the students lose reverence for him. One of these pieces of advice for the teacher, obviously, is that whenever you teach, you don’t spare any moment to advise your students.

We’ve seen that, by Allah, from our teachers, our shuyukh. Subhanallah, as they walk, they teach. It’s not just teaching and answering questions; sometimes, students study books with them. I’ve seen that with Sheikh Ibn Baz and Sheikh Al-Uthaymeen. Subhanallah, as they walk from the masjid to the house or vice versa, students sit by the door, each holding a book or a list of questions. When the sheikh opens the door and leaves, everyone jumps and starts walking, taking turns to ask their questions. The sheikh gives each person a few minutes, explaining and answering questions. The walk to the masjid might take 15 minutes, maybe more, and it’s all about seeking and teaching knowledge non-stop. If someone can dedicate that time and give advice, that’s a blessing.

However, we learned earlier from the etiquette of students not to overwhelm your teacher. It depends on the energy and time. If there is energy and time, you may use that. But if you see that it’s becoming overwhelming or the teacher indicates it’s enough, then it is enough.

Considering the Student’s Understanding Level

The teacher must consider the student’s level of understanding and intellect and not delve into matters they cannot understand. It has been narrated that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “I have been commanded to address people according to their intellects.”

Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “There is certain knowledge here; if only I could find people to carry it.” Al-Shafi’i, may Allah have mercy on him, said, “Should I scatter pearls for grazing camels? Should I poetize prose for herders of sheep? Who grants ignoramuses his knowledge will waste it. Who denies the deserving from it has wronged them.”

Teaching at an Appropriate Level

So, what does this mean? This whole point is about ensuring that whenever you teach, you are mindful of what and whom you are teaching. If you’re teaching middle school kids or high school students, don’t speak in a language that brings up controversial topics that will confuse them. If you’re talking to mothers, don’t bring topics that make them feel guilty. Depending on the age, education level, or level of faith, take that into consideration. You need to help them grow with you. You teach them one step at a time. Don’t start with subjects or controversial topics that cause more harm than benefit. You might ask, “How could knowledge become more damaging than beneficial?” Some people might attend sessions and think they have all the knowledge, causing them to misunderstand complex topics.

If you’re teaching beginners, don’t start with advanced topics. For example, is it okay to start with beginners by discussing the highest levels of meaning, like the intent of sharia or the maxims governing Islamic law? Probably, as I mention these terms, some are wondering what they even mean. Exactly. These are advanced topics of usul al-fiqh. Instead, start by teaching the basics: where the law comes from, the sources of law, how to use the Qur’an for establishing rules in our lives, and the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him). Take them one step at a time. Otherwise, if you introduce controversial topics prematurely, it might lead them astray. That’s what Imam Ibn Qudama, may Allah have mercy on him, was mentioning.

Don’t give them something that will confuse them or that their minds cannot comprehend. A disputable hadith states, “I have been commanded to address people based on their level of intellect.” Another narration from Ali himself says, “When you talk to people, speak at a level they can understand. Do you want them to deny Allah and His Messenger?” If you speak to them about something they’ve never heard of, they may call you an apostate or a hypocrite, denying the verse or hadith because they are unable to comprehend it. So, consider the context and the audience when teaching, delivering a khutbah, or discussing a topic.

He also quoted Imam Al-Shafi’i: “Should I scatter pearls among grazing camels?” This means, “If I have pearls, should I just throw them in the pasture among the camels, or in the mud, among the ignorant?” Basically, when you share knowledge, make sure you do so in the right place. That’s why the Prophet (peace be upon him) taught us a principle about talking to people: “I will guarantee you a house in the center of Jannah if you avoid arguments, even if you are right.”

Why should you stop arguing even when you are right? Because when you argue, no one listens, especially with someone ignorant. Imam Al-Shafi’i was reported to have said, “If you ever argue with an ignorant person, he will defeat you. No matter how much you try.” Why? Because they have no principles. No matter what you tell them, they will argue back.

I remember when I was much younger, I liked to argue a lot. During my first year in Jamia Islamia, I had a discussion with someone. I kept bringing up the evidence from the Qur’an and using the word daleel (evidence). He got frustrated and said, “Look, every time I bring you an argument, you tell me daleel!” At that moment, I realized there was no point in continuing the discussion. If you don’t accept the principles agreed upon by scholars, there’s no reason to argue.

Make sure that when you spread knowledge, it’s where it will truly flourish.

Practicing What You Teach

The teacher must implement what he knows and not go against Allah’s words: “Do you order righteousness of the people and forget yourselves while you recite the Scripture?”

Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “Two types of men have broken my back: a violating scholar and a devotional ignoramus.”

This statement is one of the scariest moments for any teacher. If you want to teach, you need to be true to what you’re teaching. That is the scariest thing for any teacher. How many of us believe we are perfect? None of us. We will make mistakes; we will have faults; we will sometimes not be true to what we teach. But does that mean I should not teach until I perfect the practice of my knowledge? If you wait until you become perfect, who on earth will be the one to teach? Nobody.

This is the meaning of the verse: “How dare you invite people to do good when you yourselves don’t practice it?” This is a scary warning from Allah. In Surah As-Saff, Allah says, “It is most detestable to Allah that you preach what you don’t practice yourself.” Imagine you talk to people about the value of tahajjud, the power of qiyam al-layl, and yet you never wake up for it. How strong do you think your argument will be? Our scholars say it doesn’t mean someone not perfect in a certain area cannot talk about it. It’s different when someone knows they have a sin and are remorseful, striving for improvement. You don’t have to expose yourself and say, “I don’t do that myself.” Just invite people to Allah and make an effort to improve.

Ali’s Statement

Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, said, “Two people broke my back: a scholar who violates everything he says and an ignorant person trying to be devout.” Some people don’t know how to worship Allah and invent their own practices, thinking it’s good for them. For example, some people now create an atmosphere with burning incense or candles for tahajjud. It’s not haram, but if you need this to achieve spirituality, there’s something wrong. Ibadah should be more than just setting a mood.

Knowledge and Its Side Effects

Knowledge can come with side effects, like medicine with warnings. Sometimes it’s not the fault of the knowledge but how it’s used. There are evil scholars who utilize their knowledge for worldly gain, position, or fame. Abu Huraira narrated that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Whoever learns knowledge to gain worldly enjoyment will not smell the fragrance of paradise on the Day of Resurrection.” Another hadith says, “He who learns knowledge to compete with scholars, dispute with fools, or turn people’s faces towards him is in the fire.”

Some people study Islamic knowledge just to become popular and drop out afterward when they don’t get the fame they were hoping for. They took a spot that could have been for someone truly devoted to seeking knowledge for Allah’s sake.

There are many other traditions on this as well. Some of the predecessors said, “He who regrets the most when death comes is the neglectful scholar.” A scholar is obliged to serve his Islamic obligations and abstain from the forbidden. People differ in this regard. It’s okay for an imam to have a comfortable life. There’s no one standard for being an alim. Imam Ahmad was conservative, while Imam Malik, who started with a difficult life, received gifts from the Khalifa and had a comfortable lifestyle. Annasi yatafawatun (People vary). As long as it’s halal, there is nothing wrong with it.

The Importance of Balanced Living for Scholars

It has been narrated that Sufyan al-Thawri would eat well and say, “If the beast is not given abundant fodder, it does not work.” This is what we were discussing earlier. Imam Sufyan al-Thawri liked to eat well and was not going to deprive himself of that. He would say, “If you don’t feed your horse well, it won’t take you far. My body is my horse. If I don’t feed my body well, I won’t have the strength for tahajjud, teaching, or going to Fajr. I need to sustain my body well.” That was his position.

What about Imam Ahmad? On the other hand, Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal (may Allah have mercy on him) would endure harsh living conditions to a great extent. The natures of people vary. Do we understand the difference here? So, there is no one standard for being an alim. In our time, unfortunately, it seems that we equate the level of knowledge with how much they have given up from the dunya.

However, an alim might be the richest person on earth but still the most righteous. This is why Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) was asked, “Who is better in the sight of Allah: someone who is poor but patient, or someone who is rich and grateful?” What do you think? Is the poor, patient person better, or the rich, grateful person?

The image that usually comes to mind when we think of someone rich is someone disobedient, involved in sinful actions. But for a rich person to be grateful is indeed important. Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said, “The best of the two is the one who is most righteous. Their wealth is irrelevant.” Similarly, when it comes to knowledgeable people, their wealth is irrelevant. Their lifestyle, as long as it’s within halal boundaries, is irrelevant when considering their knowledge.

That’s what he is starting to say here, and inshallah, we will continue our discussion about that next time, by the will of Allah. We’re going to stop here and move on to the next subject. For those who are following with us, inshallah, we’re going to be starting from the book of Imam Ibn Rajab, Jami’ al-Ulum wa al-Hikam, Hadith number 6 from the Arba’een al-Nawawi of Imam al-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him).

Hadith Number 6: The Importance of the Heart

The hadith states: “Verily, in the body, there is a morsel of flesh; if it is sound, the whole body is sound, and if it is corrupt, the whole body is corrupt. Verily, it is the heart.”

Ahsan. Read the translation. It is narrated by al-Bukhari and Muslim:

Abu Abdullah al-Nu’man ibn Bashir (may Allah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) saying, “The halal is clear, and the haram is clear, and in between them, there are ambivalent matters which many people do not know. Whoever guards himself against ambivalent matters has gone to the utmost limit in seeking to be clear in his deen and his honor. Whoever falls into ambivalent matters will fall into the haram, like the shepherd who shepherds his flock around forbidden pasturage; he is certain to pasture his flock in it. Surely, every king has his forbidden pasturage. Surely, Allah’s forbidden pasturage is the things He has forbidden. Surely, in the body, there is a lump of flesh; when it is sound, the whole body is sound, and when it is corrupt, the whole body is corrupt. Surely, it is the heart.”

Alhamdulillah rabbil alameen. Salallahu alayhi wa sallam wa baraka nabiyyina Muhammadin wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa sallam tasliman kathira thumma ma ba’d.

Imam al-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) chose the hadith of al-Nu’man ibn Bashir (may Allah be pleased with him): “I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) say, ‘Verily, the halal is clear, and the haram is clear.’ Halal is clear and obvious; haram is clear and obvious.”

“In between them are ambiguous matters.” In between, there are some gray areas, doubtful matters. “Most people do not know them well.” Which means what? There are a few who know them; they are still known to some, but not to the majority.

Q&A 1. Why is humility important when seeking knowledge?

• Answer: Humility allows learners to benefit from a variety of teachers, regardless of their age, popularity, or background. It helps students ask important questions without feeling shy or self-conscious.

2. What relationship should a teacher aim to have with their students?

• Answer: A teacher should treat students like their own children, caring for them and guiding them to be better than themselves. The goal is to nurture their growth and success.

3. Why is teaching for the sake of Allah emphasized in the text?

• Answer: Teaching for the sake of Allah helps ensure that the teacher remains sincere and not driven by financial rewards or praise. It allows the teacher to focus on imparting knowledge without feeling the need to compromise.

4. What is the recommended way for teachers to provide advice and correction to students?

• Answer: Teachers should offer advice generously but be sensitive and indirect when correcting students to avoid damaging the student-teacher relationship.

5. Why should teachers consider the level of understanding of their students when teaching?

• Answer: Discussing complex or controversial topics with those who may not comprehend them can lead to confusion or misguidance. It’s crucial to teach at an appropriate level to facilitate proper understanding and growth.

6. What does practicing what you teach signify for a teacher?

• Answer: Practicing what you teach demonstrates sincerity and commitment, setting a positive example for students. While perfection is not required, striving to embody the principles taught is essential to building trust.

7. How do the lifestyles of scholars vary, and what lesson does this teach us?

• Answer: Scholars’ lifestyles can range from austere to comfortable, depending on their circumstances. The lesson is that wealth or comfort does not determine righteousness; what matters is living within halal boundaries and maintaining gratitude.

8. What does the hadith about the heart teach us in the context of knowledge and behavior?

• Answer: The hadith emphasizes that the heart plays a central role in guiding a person’s actions. If the heart is sound, it leads to righteous behavior; if corrupt, it leads to wrongdoing. Therefore, safeguarding the heart is key to staying clear of doubtful matters.

9. What should teachers avoid when teaching others, according to the text?

• Answer: Teachers should avoid expecting financial compensation or favors from students, scolding students openly, and discussing complex matters that are beyond the students’ comprehension level.

10. How does knowledge misuse have potential side effects, according to the text?

• Answer: Knowledge can be misused for worldly gain, position, or fame. This misuse leads to arrogance, competition, and misguided intentions, which can detract from the true purpose of seeking knowledge for the sake of Allah.

The post Study Classical Texts the Traditional Way | Session 10 appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.

When saving a life raises questions and doubts.

There is no privacy. There is no sanitation. There is no break from relentless suffering. There is only the love and understanding of others.

The first thing to know about child sexual predators is that they are not obvious and easy-to-recognize figures standing in front of a playground in a trench coat. Like predatory animals, a child predator disguises himself, sets up traps, and then attacks. Allah has entrusted parents to protect and raise their children. Knowing how predators target, lure, and attack is essential for parents to fulfill this trust.

Selecting a target

Generally, a predator will not abuse just any child. He is afraid of being caught. He finds a child who is less likely to tell on him. In her book Why They Did it: Stories of Eight Convicted Child Molesters, Shirley O’Brien interviews child predators and writes: “Throughout the interviews, I asked each convicted child molester this question: ‘What do you look for in a child when considering a molesting relationship?’”

One predator explains how he would intuit a kid who has been molested before and would be safe for him to molest again, saying “(I look for) a quiet, hunted, hurt look. Have you ever seen somebody, and you’re shooting at them or something, they get kind of a hunted, wild-eyed look? Well, kids look like that, only it’s inside, it’s kind of like stuck hurt. Those kinds of kids, generally, also, are really dependent on other people, and that makes them prime target for an adult that’s going to be friends with them, take them places, and do things with them.”

A predator will either be opportunistic in his abuse or groom to carry out his abuse.

O’Brien writes that “Some of the men said they were concerned with ‘the opportunity of the moment,’ or convenience. If the child was available and they wanted the child, they seized the moment. Others described their modus operandi like this: “I watch for that special look in the eyes—sort of like a hunted deer, all alone in the woods, scared, knowing that you are going to kill it.’”

Opportunity

An opportunistic predator will target a child who is easily accessible and take advantage of the situation. The implicit trust associated with positions like teacher, coach, or foster parent provides predators direct access to children without raising suspicion. Often, a child’s sexual abuser is a close relative or family friend, with the relationship itself acting as a cover. The predator can rely on the parents not believing that something so vile could happen in such a mundane scenario.

Grooming

Grooming is a process that sets the stage for abuse. The predator seeks to gain the parents’ trust in order to gain access to the child and slowly desensitizes the child to abuse so that it becomes as acceptable as possible to the child, and leaves him unable to draw a clear line between what is normal and what is abuse.

1. Grooming the parents

Parents are groomed by having their trust earned, often with the promise of a benefit. This can be done in many ways. For example, the predator might be there to help the family in times of need or take the child under his wing. A single mother with a son may be particularly concerned about her child lacking a positive male role model, so when a man takes on this role, it relieves her. It seems as though her dreams are coming true, and her greatest worry is eased. He may take the child to baseball games, or outdoors, and give the child what he was otherwise missing. A teacher might claim that a student is gifted and deserves special attention, or that a student is struggling and would benefit from one-on-one time. This does not come off creepy when the male doing so is trusted, and that is why earning trust precedes spending time together.

2. Grooming the child

When the predator is approved by the parents to spend time with the child, the child becomes more receptive to learning and adopting the predator’s norms. After earning the child’s trust, the predator will introduce inappropriate touch as appropriate. Conversations may be used to change standards of appropriateness, such as an adult talking about private parts under the guise of a joke. He may show sexual content under the guise of a joke, or expose himself and act as if it is normal or funny- all with the intention to confuse the child about appropriate interaction and to desensitize him to it. Then sexual activity can be slowly introduced and discussed as a fun activity and a way of showing love. When this activity is presented as a shared secret, the child feels morally obliged to not tell on him.

A predator may give gifts to the child, showering him with love and attention. He will test the child’s ability to keep secrets by sharing silly facts about himself, such as confiding, “I like to sleep with my shoes on.”

3. Grooming the community

A predator needs to conceal his malice. He needs to have a good reputation and have others think well of him so he is trusted with children and never suspected of doing anything heinous. Humans think they can tell when someone is the type to abuse children, and that it would be obvious to them. A predator exploits this confidence people have in themselves to judge character, and easily takes on the appearance of someone people would not expect to abuse kids.

For example, we often hold a naïve view that if someone has an authentic ijaza he is less likely to abuse. Or if he has trained under a shaykh or spent time with a pious person he won’t be abusive. This baseless belief is exactly why ijazas, suhba, and associations with trusted figures make for such good covers. Being qualified in tajweed will reduce the likelihood of the teacher teaching tajweed incorrectly. It will not reduce the likelihood of him abusing a child at all. When we drop these false beliefs, we can work towards actual solutions.

Child predators can be charming and good at their careers or volunteer efforts. There are teachers who have won Teacher of the Year who are later convicted of pedophilia. There are reputable religious leaders who use their trusted positions to access and abuse children. There are reputable coaches who use their coaching positions to molest the children they coach. A prominent example of this is Jerry Sandusky who was a renowned coach and philanthropist who ostensibly helped children from troubled backgrounds. His reputation helped him access vulnerable youth that he would sexually abuse- and his good public works provided a cover for his abuse and intimidated victims from speaking out.

4. Creating an eccentric or quirky persona

When we already have an unfavorable view of someone we detect red flags. When we are suspicious or dislike someone, flaws are magnified. But when we are captivated by them or love them, flaws become cute quirks or silly habits. Part of a predator’s grooming of the community is to make his red flags seem like quirks. This is why only in hindsight people will find ‘obvious’ red flags.

Calling himself ‘the touchy-feely type,’ or ‘a kid at heart’ will allow the predator to regularly touch the child, and play games involving touch, all aimed to desensitize the child to touch as well as to persuade other adults such behavior is excusable. Inappropriate touch will be mixed with appropriate touch, with the fact that there is just too much overall touch going unnoticed on account of his ‘quirk.’ Sandusky showered with the youth in his foundation and wrestled with them. Given that he was a celebrated coach, all of that was overlooked and excused as just being ‘his style.’

Larry Nassar was a doctor for the USA Gymnastics team. He even volunteered twenty hours a week while in medical school. He was a legendary doctor and women even felt honored to be able to be seen by him. He had a reputation for caring greatly for young athletes and taking care of their physical and emotional needs. Yet at the same time, he was routinely penetrating girls and women with his fingers under the guise of medical care.

Just read the introduction for him on Gymcastic, a podcast about gymnastics:

Who we would pick if we were going to pick a doctor to take care of our kids while they traveled around the world flipping at speeds that would make an astronaut jealous? It’s USA Gymnastics Team Physician, Larry Nassar, A.T.C.  He’s a professor, a certified athletic trainer, an osteopath, and one of the most caring human beings you could ever hope to meet. A blunt, honest, experienced professional who tells it like it is. He can do that because he’s so compassionate.

Sowing distrust between parent and child

Once a predator has earned the parents’ trust and has secured access to the child, he aims to become trusted by the child. If the child does not trust him, he can play on the fear of the child, and intimidate him by appealing to how much the parents trust him.

Child isolated by sowing distrust [PC: Richard Stachman (unsplash)]

In the first case, when the child trusts the predator, he can sew distrust of the parents in the child’s mind. He may fabricate conversations about the parents just not really wanting him anymore, or being worried about his ability to socialize, or anything else meant to demoralize the child and show the parents have a low opinion of him. This conveys that he cannot go to them with his problems, and ultimately the abuse will not be believed.

In the case where the child is fearful or hates his abuser, the predator will exaggerate the trust the parents have in him. He may even touch the child while the parents are around but not watching to convey ‘your parents accept what I do to you.’ The predator can rely on the child’s fear of his authority to not tell. Unfortunately, in too many cases, parents will disbelieve their own child- and this is an additional reason predators groom parents. A single mom, for example, can be told that her son needs more hugs and needs to be comfortable showing emotions. So when he complains about touch or inappropriate closeness, she will recall already being notified by his mentor, and recall how he is working on her son’s development, and the child’s complaints and discomfort are just normal complaints of not wanting to do something new. She does not understand it as abuse. In these situations, the predator is trusted more by the parent than the child, and he is trusted to convey what the child really thinks and believed to have insights into the child the parent does not. He uses the parents’ trust to isolate the child. This isolation intensifies the child’s vulnerability to further abuse and makes it even harder to break free from the predator’s grip.

Involving the parents

Getting the parent to sign off with him in his operation is the biggest victory for a predator. If the guardian of a child is in the operation of abusing the child, he has secured the most precious accomplice. A predator can be so skilled in predation that he finds a mother who is willing to commit the ultimate betrayal. She will knowingly give him access to molest her own child. This is an ideal catch for a predator. There are many cases of women letting their boyfriends molest their kids, who are happy as long as their needs are being met. Some fathers even molest their own children. Some parents will let a drug dealer have sex with their child as a way to pay off a debt.

What this all means for us

Child sexual predators exist in public and private schools, hospitals, youth sports, the synagogue, the church, the masjid, martial arts, and any other institution of trust. Predators may choose these institutions for access to children to molest, or be in these institutions and use their opportunity. These institutions provide a cover of trust. They can be highly successful in these institutions, win ‘Teacher of the Year,’ be seen as pious and put forward as role models, or be celebrated in the community for their philanthropy.

We should not think that Muslims do not sexually abuse children, or that they are safer than non-Muslims in this regard. A Muslim child sexual predator will not be qualitatively different than any other kind. Some particulars will vary. Grooming parents or the community for trust will include what earns a Muslim parent’s or community’s trust, as mentioned before by having authentic ijazas or being connected to awliya. Too many Muslims are prepped to think it’s always the young or unconnected teachers who have problems. Whether one has ijazas or not, has known teachers or not, is a celebrity or a pleb, will make no difference in regards to his propensity to commit child sexual abuse.

Manipulating parents may include telling parents that there is a jinn inside the child, and that the religious figure needs to touch him and be alone with him to get the jinn out. Ruqya to remove the ‘haz of shaytan’ can also be used as an excuse to touch the child inappropriately.

Discussing inappropriate matters under the guise of religion is also a grooming method. Talking about istinja or fiqh of ghusl in inappropriate ways is a way of lowering boundaries and normalizing discussions of private parts. If these matters are spoken about in silly ways or brought up excessively, we must judge them as inappropriate. We don’t have to wait until we hear about abuse to determine whether or not it is in fact grooming. Parental permission should be required before bringing up these topics with children. There is a difference between there being no modesty in religious matters themselves, and the absence of modesty in the way one discusses those matters.

As with other groomers, a likable teacher speaking inappropriately may be dismissed as a quirk or a necessary way of speaking about sensitive matters to be effective with the youth. General standards or expectations of appropriate conduct will be dropped for the one we like and find charming. Parents are sometimes so desperate for religious figures to connect with their children that they overlook clearly inappropriate behavior.

It is important to understand that Islamic beliefs do not make us any more vulnerable. Larry Nassar used medical treatment as a cover to molest young girls and women, a Muslim predator will use ruqya. A coach will tell parents he needs extra time with a little league player because he is gifted and destined to be a professional star. A Sufi predator will say he needs extra time with a child for sulook because he sees the child destined for wilaya.

Specific excuses given may vary from religion to religion or no religion, but the overall tactics are the same.

Attraction towards children

الحكم على الشيء فرع عن تصوره

There is no solution if we don’t properly understand the problem.

Sexual attraction towards children needs to be understood as something with which people are afflicted. Only when this problem is recognized as something very much present in society, and as an attraction that in many instances leads to sexual acts, can we take prevention seriously.

There is no Quranic ayah or hadith that prohibits being alone with, looking at, or touching prepubescent males. Nevertheless, we have many statements and rulings from scholars prohibiting these actions. The reason is: that they became aware of the attraction that a non-negligible amount of men had towards الأمرد الحسن ,the handsome beardless boy, and it was present enough to be considered مظنة الفتنة, a scenario that is likely to be one of sexual temptation.

Imam al-Nawawi mentions this in regards to the handsome beardless boy1:

 مجرد النظر إِلى الأمرد الحسن حرامٌ، سواء كان بشهوة أم بغيرها، إِلا إذا كانت لحاجة  شرعية: كحاجة البيع، والشراء، أو التطبب، أو التعليم ونحوها، فيباح حينئذ قدرُ الحاجة، وتحرم الزيادة، قال تعالى: {قُلْ لِلْمُؤْمِنِينَ يَغُضُّوا مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِمْ وَيَحْفَظُوا فُرُوجَهُمْ ذَلِكَ أَزْكَى لَهُمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ خَبِيرٌ بِمَا يَصْنَعُونَ}  وقد نص الشافعي رحمه الله تعالى وغيرُه من العلماء رحمهم الله تعالى على تحريم النظر إِليه من غير حاجة شرعية واحتجوا بالآية الكريمة، ولأنه  في معنى المرأة؛ بل بعضهم أحسنُ من كثير من النساء، ولأنه يمكن في حقه من الشر ما لا يمكن في حق المرأة، ويتسهل من طرق الريبة والشر في حقه، ما لا يتسهل  في حق المرأة، فهو بالتحريم أولى، وأقاويل السلف في التنفير منهم، والتحذير من رؤيتهم أكثرُ من أن تحصر، وسموهم الأنتانَ؛ لأنهم مستقذَرون شرعًا، وسواء في كل ما ذكرناه، نظر المنسوب إِلى الصلاح وغيره

The gist of what he mentions is:

The mere act of looking at al-amrad al-hasan is prohibited, whether with desire or without it, except in cases of need accepted by sharia, such as buying and selling, medical treatment, education, and other similar cases. In such instances, only the amount necessary for the need is permitted, and any excess is forbidden. Allah says: {Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is Acquainted with what they do}. Imam al-Shafi’i and other scholars have explicated the prohibition of looking at him without a valid need, using the previously mentioned Quranic verse as evidence and that he is akin to a woman, and some are even more alluring than women, and there is more potential for vice than what can arise from a woman. The avenues that people take advantage of to use young boys to satisfy their desires are not as closely guarded as the avenues that they take advantage of to use women to satisfy their desires. The statements of the salaf warning against them and advising against looking are plentiful, and they even referred to such individuals as “putrid” because they are repulsive by sharia. This applies whether the individual is perceived as righteous or not.

Ibn Taymiya states2:

والنظر إلى وجه الأمرد بشهوة كالنظر إلى ذوات المحارم والمرأة الأجنبية بشهوة، سواء كانت الشهوة شهوة الوطء، أو شهوة التلذذ بالنظر، فلو نظر إلى أمه وأخته وابنته يتلذذ بالنظر كما يتلذذ بالنظر إلى وجه المرأة الأجنبية كان معلوما لكل أحد أن هذا حرام، فكذلك النظر إلى وجه الأمرد باتفاق الأئمة.

 Looking at the face of al-amrad  (a young boy) with desire is similar to looking at the faces of one’s mahram women or non-mahram women with desire. Whether the desire is the desire of sexual intimacy or the desire from the pleasure derived from looking. If someone looks at his mother, sister, or daughter and takes pleasure in the gaze as one takes pleasure in looking at the face of a non-mahram woman, it is well known to everyone that this is forbidden. Similarly, looking at the face of a young boy [with desire] is unanimously prohibited by the imams.

There is a plethora of statements regarding the fitna of al-amrad al-hasan. Whether this is a prohibition to prevent harm or an intrinsic prohibition is debated, but the number of statements and narrations establish that the fuquha recognized and addressed the problem. Fuquha operate from broader principles where they recognize how these principles apply to their context. They deal with social realities. They guide to preventative measures. If they are in a context where people are attracted to beardless boys, that will be reflected in their rulings. Law becomes acceptable when it is grounded in the primary texts and deals with the issues that confront people. The amrad was such an issue. Jurists are realistic about identifying social malaise and being forthright about their rulings.

As such, we shouldn’t just understand these statements as guidance for the one struggling with the attraction. By being clear about the attraction and the reality of people acting on it, the prohibition makes it taboo and serves as a preventative, which is good for all of society.

Finally, on this point, we must not be naïve and think the fitna of being attracted to young boys existed in the past or other societies, and that our society is free of it. A basic glance at pedophilia statistics, child pornography, and child trafficking will show you how present this vice is in the modern Western world. Given this fitna is very much a reality in our time, we too should take from the wisdom of early ulema and be cautious in interactions between young boys and men. Just as they acknowledged the problem in order to address it, we too need to acknowledge it rather than sweep it under the rug, and then deal with it.

Preventing child sexual abuse

Given the high rates of child sexual abuse, and how child sexual predators seek positions of institutional trust, it is imperative that we establish firm preventatives and protocols against child sexual abuse. A child sexual predator either abuses in opportunities he is given, or by creating opportunities. Working in institutions of trust like the masjid or an Islamic organization gives him that opportunity. Some will position themselves to work in these intuitions and gain the trust of parents to access children, others will find jobs where they can work with children.

There are two levels at which we must work to prevent predators from carrying out their predation. At home first and then in institutions.

The parents’ responsibility

The Prophet ﷺ said

“All of you are shepherds and each of you is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of the people of his house and he is responsible. A woman is the shepherd of the house of her husband and she is responsible. Each of you is a shepherd and each is responsible for his flock.”

Open communication is key to protecting children [PC: Sebastian Leon Prado (unsplash)]

Part of the responsibilities entailed by the parents’ wilaya is to protect their children from harm. The home is the most important level for prevention. It is imperative we teach our children about appropriate and inappropriate touch and words. For example, they must know which areas cannot be touched under any circumstance, which individuals in particular can take them to the bathroom, and other similar guidelines. This is the job of the parents. The parents must know the society in which they live does not allow for them to just trust no one will commit heinous acts.

Having open communication with children will let them know they can trust you and report inappropriate behavior to you. This will prevent them from believing a predator who says ‘your parents will be angry with you’ and other such tactics.

Single mothers must be wary of any shaykh breaking their confidence in raising sons. He may say that you cannot raise a son to persuade you of his importance in your son’s life. Fathers must take their roles of protectors of their families seriously and not dismiss any concerns raised by their children or feelings of discomfort of being around any individual. Parents must teach their children to be assertive. Predators will target kids they think that they can get away with abusing. If a child is trained to say ‘no’ and stand his ground, he is less likely to be targeted.

Children must also be taught that if anyone tells them not to tell something to their parents, or that their parents won’t believe them, they should respond by saying that’s not true and they know their parents will believe them. Stories such as Little Red Riding Hood are an appropriate way of teaching children about deception and manipulation without scaring them.

Parents must also fight the reflex to say ‘he is your teacher, listen to him!’ when the child shows signs of discomfort around his teacher. Knowing that sowing mistrust between parent and child is a tactic for isolating the child, parents must be vigilant in not shutting the child down when he raises an issue or shows signs of discomfort.

Finally, it is absolutely important for a parent not to let a child study alone with a male teacher in particular. Supervision is necessary at all times if it is a one-on-one class. Parents should never leave the child alone. Not only does this prevent any opportunity for harm, but it also sends a strong signal that the parent is present and protective. This should also be the case in online classes, where conversations can quickly turn inappropriate.

In the context of schools or group lessons, children should be told not to be alone with teachers, and also parents should check with the schools whether or not they have protocols in place already.

At the institutional level

Institutes must have policies and protocols in place that prevent child sexual abuse. There must be rules accompanied by training where teachers and all staff members are fully aware they cannot be alone with a child. There must be rules governing email exchanges, social media relationships, and touch. Cameras must also be in place.

This will allow institutions to hold adults accountable for inappropriate behavior. For example, if a teacher is alone with a student, or makes inappropriate jokes, they should be fired for violating policy. Their actions should not be ignored because it’s less than child sexual abuse. The fact that these are pathways to abuse, and are already against the institute’s policy would be sufficient to fire him, and it ensures the wellbeing of children. It is possible the inappropriate joke is not grooming, but we cannot take that risk when it comes to children.

Institutions will always be limited in prevention and this is why parental responsibility is the most important. Policies will always be limited, and best practices have their limitations. There are too many possible scenarios to account for that may not affect policies. Background checks will not be useful for someone who has not been caught before. Cameras will not ensure abuse will be reported and the film reviewed. Staff cannot be expected to care for your child as you do. Parental responsibility cannot be outsourced. Institutes also need to see that you are the kind of parent who will create a problem for them if they do not fire staff members who cross lines with children. Don’t be surprised if an institute that fires a young teacher for inappropriate behavior will overlook, excuse, and cover up for a senior shaykh- a pillar of the community- when he is caught doing the unthinkable to a child. Don’t let any institute or religious leader pressure you to sweep it under the rug, not press charges, and give the perpetrator a second chance.  Be a strong parent and raise strong children so the institutes who are not motivated to protect children on principle will do so based on fear.

Conclusion

Child predators either exploit opportunities they have to molest children or seek out positions of trust where they will have access to children. They will generally choose children they think they can get away with molesting. The predator will exploit his position of trust. He will groom parents, the child, and the community to seem trustworthy and access children.

We cannot be naive about child sexual predators.  Parents have a responsibility to take preventative measures, such as teaching their kids to tell them if any adult asks the kids to keep a secret from them, teach their children about inappropriate touch, and to be strong. Parents also must ensure that institutions have policies, procedures, and physical structures that reduce any inappropriate interactions between children and adults. Institutions must make the safety of children a top priority and take adult and child interaction very seriously. Expectations of interactions between adults and children must be made clear, and offenses such as inappropriate comments to children, and being alone with them must have a zero-tolerance policy.

No one will care for your child the way you will. Institutes will take child protection more seriously when parents themselves are actively voicing concern about child safety.

[This article was first published here]

 

Related:

– Safeguarding Children In Today’s World: An Islamic Perspective On Child Sexual Abuse Prevention And Protection

– Why Even the Spiritually Elevated Are Vulnerable: The Hidden Harms of Spiritual Abuse. Recognizing Vulnerability And Healing From Degradation

1    https://shamela.ws/book/497/180:2    https://www.islamweb.net/ar/fatwa/26446

The post From The Playbook Of A Child Predator: What Muslim Parents Need To Know appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.

Even as Gaza gets smaller, distances expand.

Lack of faith in political leaders is leading the socially disaffected to be seduced by violence

Taleb al-Abdulmohsen, the alleged perpetrator of the horror attack on the Christmas market in Magdeburg, does not, Germany’s interior minister, Nancy Faeser, observed, “fit any existing mould”. He had acted in “an unbelievably cruel and brutal manner, like an Islamist terrorist, though he was clearly ideologically hostile to Islam”.

Faeser is not alone in her confusion about how to understand Abdulmohsen.

Do you have an opinion on the issues raised in this article? If you would like to submit a letter of up to 250 words to be considered for publication, email it to us at observer.letters@observer.co.uk

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Allah , the Almighty and the Most High has created us of the best stature and granted us many abilities so that we may look after our needs and those of our relatives and fellow Muslims. He has invited us to explore the earth and use it for our subsistence:

“It is He Who has made the earth subservient to you, so walk in the path thereof and eat of His provision, and to Him will be the resurrection,” [Surah Al-Mulk; 67:15]

Allah has made it clear in this very verse, as well as in other verses, that had He not made this earth manageable to us, we would not be able to explore it nor benefit from it.

Understanding Tawakkul Through Surah Al-Mulk

This chapter of the Qur’an is actually – in my humble opinion – a yardstick for understanding tawakkul (trust and complete reliance on Allah ). Surah Al-Mulk starts and finishes with the same message: to Allah belongs all that is in the universe and nothing would happen without His Mercy and constant watchful care. Allah says in the first verse,

“Blessed be He in Whose hands is the Dominion, and He is able to do all things.”

He then says in the last verse,

“Say: Have you thought, ‘if your water were to disappear into the earth, who then can supply you with clear-flowing water?'”

Yes, we can surely explore the earth, look for regions holding water, and successfully discover fountain sources and streams. But without Allah’s Permission and facilitation, we will not be able to reach this water. Furthermore, what would happen if – all of a sudden – Allah made the sources and springs of our water supply disappear in the deep underground of the earth? Blessed and Glorified be He! No one will bring it back but He.

The Balance Between Striving and Divine Provision

There is a hintful touch in the verse mentioned earlier. Allah says, “…so walk in the path thereof.” Then He says, “…and eat of His provision.” So Allah is telling us that though you are encouraged to strive and work hard, what you produce is not yours; what you earn is not yours. Rather, your production, your earnings, and all your subsistence come from Allah . 

He made it available to you out of His Mercy and Care for you. Hence, if Allah wills, your work and efforts will be fruitless. Similar verses where Allah ascribes subsistence solely to Him are found in many places in the Qur’an. Allah says, “…So seek from Allah (Alone) subsistence and worship Him (Alone), and be grateful to Him. To Him (Alone) will be your return.” [Surah Al-‘Ankabut; 29:17]

Those who misunderstand the Plan of Allah and His Wisdom areconfused by this double command of Allah – to strive and work on the one hand, and rely on Allah to make the actions possible and goals attainable, on the other.

Initially, this question was presented before the Prophet . The Companions asked: Should we quit working and rely on Al-Qadar (Allah’s predetermined decree)? The Prophet answered: “You should initiate and do things. Everyone shall be facilitated towards that for which he was created.” Consequently, the Companions of the Prophet moved on and initiated righteous deeds while putting their trust in Allah . [Bukhari & Muslim]

The work that is referred to here is not that of the acts of worship (Salah, Zakah, Sawm, Haj, etc). Rather, it is the work pertaining to our subsistence. Furthermore, we do not refer to haram (forbidden) work and haram subsistence – for we believe, inshaAllah, that the reader is conscious of that. It is the halal (permissible) work and the halal livelihood that we are concerned about here, for it is more tempting to the believer. 

What are the guidelines and limits of the halal work? How much dedication do we give it? Do we attribute the source of subsistence to our work or to Allah’s Bounties? And do we associate the loss and deprivation of wealth, health, and success with our loss of job, or with Allah’s universal plan?

Islam’s Position on Work and Self-Reliance

Islam does not condone passiveness, but it also strongly rejects laziness and dependency on others. [PC: Do Nhu (unsplash)]

Islam is a dynamic religion. Not only does it not condone passiveness, but it also strongly rejects laziness and dependency on others. The Prophet said: “Begging is forbidden except when there is great debt, suffering, injury, or abasing poverty.” [Abu Dawud and Al-Bayhaqi] He also said: “It is much better for one of you to take his rope and go to chop some wood (for his livelihood) than to beg from people, whether they give him anything or deny him.” [Al-Bukhari, Ibn Majah, and others] 

The Prophet himself worked hard for his living. He spent his boyhood as a shepherd and took to trade in manhood. He carried people’s goods to Syria and other places and shared the profits with them.

The Prophet used to constantly seek refuge with Allah from laziness as reported by Zayed Ibn Arqam: “O Allah! I seek refuge in You from incapacity, from laziness, from cowardice, from miserliness, from ineptitude, and from the torment of the grave…” [Muslim]

The True Meaning of Tawakkul

However, though we might strive hard to secure our livelihood, we should not attribute our achievements solely to the work we do, but to Allah . We should not put our reliance on our work, our possessions, our wealth, our position, etc. Neither should we rely on our manager, our employer, our friends, and our families. 

The only one on Whom we should rely is Allah . He says in the Quran,

“…And rely on the Living One (Allah), Who will never die, and celebrate His praises and thanks. And sufficient is He to be acquainted with the sins of His slaves.” [Surah Al-Furqan; 25:58]

Whoever attaches his/her heart to his job, or to his/her employer, or to any created beings in order for them to provide him/her with sustenance or to make him/her prosperous and successful, and so on, he/she has submitted to them. And the more one relies on the created beings, the weaker becomes one’s submission to Allah .

So, as much as Allah wants from us to initiate actions and seek and use all permissible means to secure our needs and those of our families, He also wants us not to depend on these means as the source of our sustenance. This is the genuine understanding of tawakkul.

Two Extreme Misunderstandings of Tawakkul

Those who deviated from the right concept of tawakkul have fallen into two extremes. The first group of people are those attracted by the temptations of this world, and have gone so far as to forget their relationship with Allah . Their heart has become so attracted to these temptations that they become subservient to their desires. 

Such people have become – knowingly or unknowingly – slaves of their own desires. Such people will ultimately claim that all their achievements are but the result of their own work and that Allah had no involvement whatsoever. They do not rely on Allah .

Allah says,

“Have you then seen the sort of man who rejects Our signs, yet says: ‘I shall certainly be given wealth and children.'”

Allah then rejects their arrogant claim by saying,

 

 

“Has he penetrated to the unseen, or has he taken a promise with Allah?” [Surah Maryam; 19:77-78]

This type of man who rejects Allah and denies His bounties regards himself as “self-sufficient” and thus, cannot be expected to rely on Allah .

The second group of people are those who understood the reliance on Allah as meaning to completely break away from all mundane affairs. They regarded piety and the pursuit of any material interests as contradictory. 

For them, reliance on Allah would mean not taking any initiative to secure one’s subsistence. Consequently, they renounce the world and retire themselves to remote areas or secluded spots and cut themselves from daily life.

Unfortunately, neither of these two groups, have understood the true meaning of tawakkul according to the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Prophet . Had they attempted to understand the Book of Allah according to the understanding and implementation of the Prophet and his honorable companions, they would have found that tawakkul is far removed from how they conceived it.

Examples of True Tawakkul In Creation

The Example of the Bee:

Through the instinctive behavior of some of His Creatures and the sublime conduct of His Prophets and righteous slaves, Allah has set out in His Book examples of genuine tawakkul. First, let us look at the fascinating life of the bee.

Allah says:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“And your Lord taught the bee to build its cells in hills, on trees, and in men’s habitation; then to eat of all the produce of the earth, and follow the way of your Lord made smooth: There issues from within their bodies a drink of varying colors, wherein is healing for men: Verily in this is a sign for those who give thought.” [Surah Al-Nahl; 16:68-69]

Look at the gigantic workload that the bee has to carry out in order to produce its honey. The bee finds the most inaccessible places, in the hills, in the trees, and even among the habitation of men. It assimilates the juice of various kinds of flowers and fruit, and forms within its body the honey which it stores in its cells of wax. The different kinds of food from which it makes its honey give different colors to the honey. 

Now, could not Allah provide for the bees their sustenance without them going through all this labor? Of course, He could! Could not Allah create springs and rivers of honey as he created springs and rivers of water? Of course, He could! 

But by observing the work cycle of the bee and by tasting its sweet and wholesome honey, one can understand and appreciate better the nature and behavior of the bee. A behavior whose ingredients are hard work and complete trust in Allah : And that is the real tawakkul.

The Example of the Birds:

Let us look at another creature of Allah : the bird. Allah says,

“Do they not observe the birds above them, spreading their wings and folding them in? None can uphold them except the Most Gracious: Truly it is He that watches over all things,” [Surah Al-Mulk 67:19]

As He did for all of His Creatures, our Lord provided for the birds just those conditions that are best for their lives; He also inspired them to use their physical shapes and unique movements to take off, fly, and land.

“Were you to put your complete trust in Allah, He would provide for you as He provides for the birds. They issue forth hungry in the morning and return filled in the evening.” [PC: Birger Strahl (unsplash)]

Thus, in order to fly, birds would have to move their wings upwards and downwards, spread them, and fold them. However, the birds know that the One Who upholds them in the air, is not their upward and downward move, nor the spreading and folding of their wings, but rather Allah . They have understood that they have to exert effort and rely on Allah alone to uphold them high. As opposed to many rebellious men, birds recognize and exercise total tawakkul in Allah without giving up the work. 

In pursuing this way of life, the birds have become the example to follow for how true tawakkul should be, and how Allah would reward the one who exercises tawakkul as the birds do.

The Prophet said: “Were you to put your complete trust in Allah, He would provide for you as He provides for the birds. They issue forth hungry in the morning and return filled in the evening.” [Al-Tirmidhi]

Did the birds remain in their nest waiting for Allah’s Provision? Of course not! Did they claim that since they were engaged in tasbeeh (praising of Allah ), they would not have to strive for their subsistence? Of course not! So praised is Allah Who inspired the birds to set forth to seek provisions for themselves and for their little ones. Praised is He Who taught them tawakkul so they would not expect provision but from Him.

The Example of Maryam

Now back to the world of mankind, here is an ultimate example of tawakkul. This is the story of an expectant mother who retired with her conceived baby to a remote area. The pains of childbirth drove her to the trunk of a palm tree. She was alone with no one to attend her. She was hungry and thirsty. She cried: “Ah! would that I had died before this! Would that I had been forgotten and out of sight!” [Surah Maryam, 19:23] But a voice cried to her from beneath the palm tree: “Grieve not! for your Lord has provided a water stream beneath you.” [Surah Maryam, 19:24]

She knew now that Allah would deliver her from her hunger and thirst and release the pain of her pangs. But the Most High wanted her to initiate an action to benefit from His Provisions: “And shake towards yourself the trunk of the palm tree: it will let fall fresh ripe dates upon you.” [Surah Maryam, 19:25] Now that she fulfilled the physical part of her duties – by shaking the tree, she had to fulfill the spiritual part – trusting Allah for deliverance. Allah’s Help was prompt: the fresh dates were now falling upon her: “So eat and drink and be glad!…,” [Surah Maryam, 19:26]

This is the story of Maryam (Mary) whom Allah had destined to be the mother of Prophet ‘Isa (Jesus) . And when she conceived her baby and entered the pains of childbirth with no one to attend her; when she got hungry and thirsty with no visible help for food and drink; when she became weak and anguished; she was asked to shake a palm tree for her provision. 

A weak, tired, hungry, and thirsty pregnant woman shaking a strong, deeply rooted palm tree. Could not Allah send with Jibreel (Angel Gabriel) enough food and drink for her? Could not Allah send down from the heavens a ready-to-eat plate of dates? Or could not Allah say to the dates ‘fall upon Mary!’, upon which they would? After all, is not Allah the only One Who, when He wills a thing, only says to it, “Be” – and it is? Yes, yes, and yes, He is! But Allah’s Way is that the effort has to be made, and the trust has to be complete; the tawakkul has to be fulfilled.

Conclusion

These were only a few examples of Allah’s Creatures putting their trust in Him. The wisest course for us, therefore, is to follow their example. So let us use all lawful means and exert reasonable effort to secure our needs, and let us remain faithful to Allah by putting all our affairs in His Hands and hoping and expecting the best outcome. Let us say like the early believers said:

“Say, ‘He is the Most Beneficent (Allah), in Him we believe, and in Him we put our trust,” [Surah Al-Mulk, 67:29]

O Allah! Make us among those who believe in You and put their trust in You. O Allah! send Your Grace, Honour, and Mercy on Muhammad , his family, his followers, and all those who follow his Path until the Last Day. Ameen!

 

Related:

–He Catches Me When I Fall: A Journey To Tawakkul

– Emotional Self-Healing: Lessons From The Quran And Sunnah

 

The post Lessons From Surah Al-Mulk: How The Bees And Birds Teach Us About Tawakkul appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.

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Reading Time

• Summary Transcript: ~4 minutes
• Full Transcript: ~28 minutes

Learning Objectives

• Understand the Importance of Purification in Knowledge
  • Learners will be able to explain why purifying the heart is a crucial step before seeking knowledge and how a pure heart is essential for retaining and practicing what is learned.
• Identify Common Distractions in the Learning Process
  • Learners will recognize the impact of distractions like social media and unnecessary worldly concerns, and understand how to avoid them to maintain focus on seeking knowledge.
• Describe the Proper Etiquette Between a Student and a Teacher
  • Learners will be able to describe the relationship between a student and teacher, highlighting the importance of humility, trust, and respect in this dynamic.
• Recognize the Barriers to Knowledge
  • Learners will identify the two primary barriers to gaining knowledge: arrogance and bashfulness, and understand how these attitudes prevent effective learning.
• Explain the Concept of Bid’ah (Religious Innovation)
  • Learners will understand what bid’ah is and why it is dangerous in religious practices, explaining how it deviates from the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ.
• State the Conditions for Accepted Worship
  • Learners will be able to articulate the two key conditions for worship to be accepted: sincerity for the sake of Allah and adherence to the sunnah.
• Provide Examples of Bid’ah in Different Aspects of Worship
  • Learners will give examples of bid’ah in the context of cause, type, amount, manner, time, and place, demonstrating how innovations can occur in different aspects of religious practice.
• Understand the Dangers of Controversial Knowledge Early in the Learning Journey
  • Learners will recognize the importance of focusing on foundational knowledge before engaging in controversial issues, understanding that this prevents confusion and strengthens their base.
• Emphasize the Importance of Sticking to the Sunnah
  • Learners will explain how adhering to the sunnah prevents bid’ah and ensures that religious practices remain pure and in line with the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ.

Class Summary

The Importance of Proper Etiquette in Seeking Knowledge and Avoiding Innovation (Bid’ah)

Seeking knowledge is one of the most important aspects of personal and spiritual growth, but it comes with essential etiquettes and responsibilities. Whether you’re a student or a teacher, understanding how to approach learning is critical to gaining true benefit. This post summarizes the core principles and manners that should guide us in our pursuit of knowledge and outlines the dangers of introducing innovations (bid’ah) into religious practices.

Purifying the Heart for Knowledge

Before we can truly acquire knowledge, it’s essential to purify our hearts. The heart is like a vessel for knowledge, and if it’s filled with bad intentions or impure traits, it won’t be able to hold the light of knowledge. Much like how acts of worship require physical purity (like making wudu for salah), acquiring knowledge demands a clean heart. You must work on clearing your heart of negative traits to truly benefit from what you learn.

Avoiding Distractions in Learning

In today’s world, distractions like social media can easily take us away from our studies. After purifying the heart, the next step is staying focused. A heart that is divided between worldly pleasures and learning will never fully grasp the reality of things. Dedication requires sacrificing unnecessary distractions, even if they are halal, in order to stay focused and steadfast in your path of learning.

Respecting and Serving Your Teacher

The relationship between a student and teacher is similar to that of a patient and doctor; trust and humility are key. You must trust your teacher’s judgment and guidance, especially early in your learning journey. Just as you wouldn’t question a doctor during treatment, you shouldn’t question your teacher’s wisdom in the early stages. Show respect and serve your teacher as a way of honoring the knowledge you’re receiving.

The Dangers of Arrogance and Bashfulness

Two things can prevent you from seeking knowledge: arrogance and bashfulness. Arrogance makes you think you’re too good to learn from someone you consider beneath you, while bashfulness prevents you from asking questions out of fear of looking foolish. Both attitudes will prevent you from gaining valuable knowledge. It’s important to remain humble and inquisitive in order to learn effectively.

What is Bid’ah and Why Is It Dangerous?

Bid’ah refers to any newly introduced practice in religion that wasn’t part of the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ. This is dangerous because every act of worship must be based on two pillars: sincerity and alignment with the sunnah. No matter how well-intentioned an act is, if it wasn’t practiced by the Prophet ﷺ or his companions, it is considered an innovation and is therefore rejected. Innovations can occur in several ways, such as altering the time, place, amount, or reason for worship.

Sticking to the Sunnah

Following the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ is crucial to maintaining the purity of our faith. Introducing new practices—even with good intentions—leads to misguidance. The Prophet ﷺ warned us about the dangers of innovation, stating that every innovation in religion is a misguidance. To stay on the right path, we must adhere strictly to the sunnah and avoid adding anything new to our religious practices.

In conclusion, seeking knowledge requires both inward and outward purification, focus, and respect for the teacher-student relationship. At the same time, we must be vigilant against introducing innovations into our religious practices, as this can lead us away from the true teachings of Islam. By adhering to these principles, we ensure that our knowledge transforms not only our minds but also our character and actions. 

Full Transcript Purification of the Inner Self in Seeking Knowledge

The student should purify his inner self. The title we’re discussing is “The Etiquette of the Teacher and the Student, and the Adversity of Knowledge,” and the scholars of evil and the scholars of the afterlife. He says that this chapter is on the etiquette of the student and the teacher and the pitfalls of knowledge. What does that mean? Sometimes, people deceive themselves with knowledge, and there are side effects in how you use and perceive knowledge when your intentions are bad, for example. That’s why he says that there are scholars, teachers, and ulema who, unfortunately, have evil intentions. On the other hand, there are the ulema of the afterlife, who seek to teach and learn knowledge for the sake of the akhirah. So, who are they? Let’s talk about this.

The student should purify his inner self from lowly characteristics and impure and blameworthy traits before anything else because knowledge is the worship of the heart. When he says that the student should first start by purifying the inner self, what does he mean? The inner self is like the pot or the envelope in which knowledge is contained. Knowledge itself is ibadah, an act of worship, and it cannot be placed in something that is impure. So, if your inner self is not pure and you try to fill it with knowledge, it’s going to repel it. It’s not going to stay there because ibadah requires purity. All acts of worship involve purity.

Connection Between Purity and Worship

For example, when you make your salah, what do you do first? You make wudu, you ensure tahara, and you make sure your clothes and your place of prayer are clean. When you fast, you purify your actions and your deeds. You refrain from looking at what you’re not supposed to look at, from touching what you’re not supposed to touch, and in that way, you sanctify the act of ibadah. It’s all part of tahara.

Similarly, knowledge is an act of worship and is like light. As Imam Al-Shafi’i says: “I complained to my teacher Waqi’ that I started forgetting. He told me, ‘You need to quit committing sins,’ because ilm is nur, it is light, and the light of Allah will not be given to someone who is a sinner.” Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, if you truly want to seek and retain knowledge, you need to work on that pot, on that inner self, where you will keep that knowledge.

Purifying the Heart from Evil Intentions

Your heart needs to be pure, pure from evil intentions. Because what is the essence of seeking knowledge? It’s about improving your character, and that improvement comes through your actions. If you’re not willing to change your ways, then knowledge may become hujjah against you—it may be evidence against you—and it will not be beneficial. We’ve mentioned many times already that the knowledge that is truly beneficial is the kind that affects you and that you practice. If you don’t practice it, it will disappear.

He made this as a disclaimer. He says, “Listen, the most important thing you need to learn as a student of knowledge is that you must prioritize the purification of your nafs, of your heart.” That’s why the ulema call it “al-tahliyah wa al-tahliyah.” What does that mean? There’s tahliyah, which is the emptying or vacating of the heart from anything unworthy, and then there’s tahliyah, which is sweetening the heart by adding that which makes it beautiful.

Creating Space for Knowledge in the Heart

Before you start adding anything to your heart, you need to empty it first. You need to make space. Because if your heart is already filled with blameworthy traits—bad intentions, bad behavior, bad character—and now you try to put something pure in it, there isn’t enough room for it. No matter how much you try, what’s already filling that space will eventually prevail and show in your character.

He’s telling us that you need to vacate your heart of everything bad so you can receive what is pure in the form of knowledge. Keep in mind, it’s not about how many books you read or how many pages you memorize. It’s about how much you retain in your heart and how it shows in your character, your behavior, and your actions.

Avoiding Distractions in the Pursuit of Knowledge

One should disassociate himself from all distractions, for when the mind is focused on more than one thing, it falls short in grasping the realities of things. The second point he makes here is that after you purify your heart and it’s ready to receive the pure light of knowledge, you must ensure that your heart isn’t distracted by vain things. He’s not necessarily talking about haram things, but about distractions, things that are unworthy of your attention.

For example, today, we live in a time where the greatest manifestation of these distractions is social media and constant phone usage. How many people are addicted to their phones? You can’t look at them without seeing them glued to their screens. What are they doing there anyway? Watching someone else’s life, someone else’s business. They keep browsing and scrolling indefinitely, and before they know it, hours have passed.

Subhanallah, this is the greatest manifestation of unnecessary distractions in our time. He says, “After purifying your heart, you must avoid these distractions, these vain things that neither benefit you in the dunya nor in the akhira. Stay focused.” He says that when the heart is divided, it cannot fully grasp the truth. If your heart is divided between money, pleasure, recreation, and other matters of the dunya, how can you expect it to fully focus on something like knowledge?

Focus and Commitment to Learning

How many people come to attend knowledge sessions, and after five or ten minutes, they start fidgeting? Why? Because they’re not used to sitting still. Their minds are thinking about checking their phones or doing something else. They’re distracted by things they don’t even need to do. They simply cannot focus.

How many times have you decided to stay after Fajr until sunrise, but then after five or ten minutes, you start thinking about other things? You tell yourself you have something more important to do, when in reality, your heart is just distracted.

Ibn Qudamah says that after purifying your heart, make sure that your heart is not distracted by unnecessary things, even if they are halal. To stay focused, you’ll have to give up many things, even things that are halal. Subhanallah, I remember once when I was a teenager, I was swimming in a public pool with my sister, her husband, and the kids. It was hot, and my sister, who was wearing her full hijab, was sitting on the side watching us.

I said, “Why don’t you jump in with us?” She replied, “I wish.” Then she taught me a lesson I’ve never forgotten. She said, “Thamalul istiqama al-hirman,” meaning, “The price of steadfastness is deprivation.”

What does that mean? In order to remain steadfast, you’ll have to give up things for the sake of Allah, and you do it with pleasure, not with grief or sorrow. I was struck by that statement, and I’ve remembered it for over 40 years. If you want to remain steadfast, to stay on the path, you’ll have to give up many things for the sake of Allah, and you must give them up with pleasure.

Learning from the Predecessors

Imam Ibn Qudamah reminds us that if you want your heart to remain focused, you’ll have to give up many things, even things that are halal, in order to stay steadfast. The predecessors preferred knowledge over everything else. It has been reported that Imam Ahmad, may Allah have mercy on him, only married at the age of 40. Why did he wait until 40 to get married? For some ulama, their reason was to focus on seeking knowledge. For others, it was to serve their mothers.

Is that something you have to do? Not necessarily, because the Prophet ﷺ was better than everyone else, and he married long before that. But some ulama made the choice to wait, like Shaykh Hisham Qaiti, who said, “I don’t want to be distracted; I want to serve my mother.” Imam Ahmad, on the other hand, chose to focus on seeking knowledge. For him, getting married and having kids would have been a distraction. He wanted to focus on ilm, and once he felt satisfied with his level of knowledge, he fulfilled the obligation of getting married.

Abu Bakr Al-Anbari was gifted a slave girl, but when she came to him, he was thinking about the derivation of a religious matter. She withdrew, and when she asked if she had done something wrong, he replied, “No, but my heart became distracted by you, and you are not worthy enough to distract me from my knowledge.”

That was a time when this was practiced in society. His point was that he wanted to focus on knowledge, and her presence distracted him. So, he chose to let her go. Imam Ibn Qudamah is bringing an example from one end of the spectrum, showing the extreme dedication some people had to their knowledge. Some people can afford that level of sacrifice, but not everyone can. These examples should be seen as inspiration, not necessarily as a model for everyone to follow.

Etiquette of the Student Towards the Teacher

The student must surrender to the teacher like a patient surrenders to the doctor. He must humble himself before the teacher and be at his service excessively. When he says that the student should throw themselves in front of the teacher like a patient in front of a doctor, what does that mean? The relationship between a doctor and a patient is built on trust. You won’t go to a doctor if you don’t trust them, right? You listen to what the doctor tells you and do what they say without question. If the doctor says, “Open your mouth,” you won’t argue or ask for evidence. You trust them.

Similarly, in the beginning of your journey seeking knowledge, you must trust your teacher’s judgment. At some point, you may become independent or semi-independent, but at the beginning, just trust your teacher and keep moving forward. Learn from your teacher, and trust that they know what’s best for you, just like you trust a doctor. Sometimes doctors give you things you don’t like, like bitter medication or a ten-day antibiotic course. Even if you don’t like it, you take it because it’s for your benefit. Similarly, a teacher may give you difficult tasks or tell you to wake up for Fajr, and it might seem hard, but it’s for your own good.

Respect for Scholars

Ibn Abbas once took hold of the rein of Zayd ibn Thabit’s horse and said, “This is how we were ordered to treat the scholars.” Subhanallah, this is a beautiful story. Both Ibn Abbas and Zayd ibn Thabit were Sahaba, but Ibn Abbas was younger. Still, when it came to seeking knowledge, Ibn Abbas would walk beside Zayd’s horse, holding the rein, helping him mount and dismount. Zayd became embarrassed and told him, “You’re the cousin of the Prophet ﷺ; you either ride with me, or I’ll walk with you.” But Ibn Abbas replied, “No, this is how we were ordered to treat the scholars.”

In some cultures, people exaggerate this level of respect, like kissing the scholar’s shoes or feet, which is too much. However, there should be a level of respect and care for the scholars, such as preparing the class and making sure their needs are met. When we were students with Shaykh al-Amin, we saw how students cared for the Shaykh’s needs, making sure everything was ready for him to simply focus on teaching. Respect is essential to appreciate the knowledge we receive from our teachers.

Arrogance and Bashfulness: Obstacles to Seeking Knowledge

If a student is too proud to learn from someone who isn’t famous for his knowledge, he is ignorant. For the believer, wisdom is the object of persistent quest, and he takes it wherever he finds it. Furthermore, a student should leave his personal opinions for the opinions of his teacher. A teacher’s mistake benefits the student more than the student’s own correctness.

What does this mean? Sometimes, students refuse to learn from someone just because that person isn’t well-known for their knowledge. Today, people gauge knowledge by the number of followers or views. Unfortunately, we follow the crowds. But hidden gems exist in local communities, and you may gain more value from learning with someone lesser-known than from someone famous. Many people want to learn from big-name scholars just to add it to their resume. Yet, there may be someone nearby who knows a little more than you and can help you advance faster than a large class with a famous scholar where you have little access to the teacher.

If you’re too proud to learn from someone because you think you’re better than them, you’ve missed an opportunity. Our scholars say two things will deprive you of knowledge: arrogance and bashfulness. Arrogance is when you think you’re too good to learn from someone, whether because they’re younger, less well-known, or don’t look like a scholar. Sheikh al-Uthaymeen, may Allah have mercy on him, told us about his experience with Sheikh al-Sa’di. When he first saw Sheikh al-Sa’di, he thought, “Really? I came all this way to learn from this Bedouin?” But the moment Sheikh al-Sa’di started speaking, he was amazed.

Similarly, Sheikh al-Shanqiti, the author of Adwa’ al-Bayan, was an encyclopedia of knowledge. If you look at him, he might seem like a simple man, but when he spoke, it was as if he was reading from a book. Such scholars may not look impressive at first, but their knowledge is profound.

Bashfulness, on the other hand, prevents you from asking questions. You might be in a class, unsure about something, but feel too shy to ask because you’re worried the question sounds stupid. This is a lost opportunity. Sheikh al-Uthaymeen said the only dumb question is the one you don’t ask. So always ask, because that’s how you learn.

Etiquette of Questioning and Respecting the Teacher’s Time

One of the rights that a scholar has upon you is that after greeting the people, you must greet him individually. Ali ibn Abi Talib gives general etiquette for dealing with elders and teachers. After greeting everyone, give a specific salam to your teacher. When you sit, sit in front of him, not behind him. Sheikh al-Uthaymeen didn’t like people sitting behind him, and he wouldn’t take questions from those who did.

You must not present frequent questions or be stubborn in asking for an answer if the teacher is tired. If he refuses to answer, don’t ask again. Also, don’t make gestures with your friends during the session, and don’t waste the teacher’s time with questions just to fill space. If you already know the answer, let someone else ask.

Refraining from Assisting or Correcting the Teacher Without Permission

Do not assist your teacher in answering a question unless he asks. Some students interrupt the teacher to add footnotes or answer questions themselves, which is disrespectful. I’ve seen this happen to our teachers, and it can be frustrating. Once, a student kept adding comments after the Shaykh’s answers, and finally, the Shaykh had to tell him, “Excuse me, please be quiet.”

If the teacher is tired or refuses to answer, don’t insist. And never grab him by the hand and beg for more time when he’s trying to leave. Once, I saw Sheikh al-Uthaymeen walking, and someone tried to help by adjusting his head covering. The Sheikh became upset, saying, “Don’t touch me.” Everyone around him immediately backed away out of respect.

Maintaining Trust and Privacy with the Teacher

Do not spread the teacher’s secrets, backbite in his presence, or look for his mistakes. If you see the Shaykh acting differently in private or hear something he says in private, don’t spread it. And don’t dig into his past to find mistakes, even from years ago.

If the Shaykh apologizes or explains a mistake, accept it. Never bring up what others say about him or mention differing opinions just to stir trouble. Instead, ask about the opinion itself without bringing in names, unless the teacher asks where you heard it.

Being Humble in Service to the Teacher

Don’t raise yourself above serving the teacher. Long companionship with a teacher is essential, and you should never feel too proud to serve them. In our time, with knowledge so easily available online, we lose the opportunity to develop good adab through companionship. Knowledge online may give you information, but it won’t teach you the proper etiquette of learning.

If the teacher is in need of something and others fulfill his need before you, know that he is like a palm tree, which benefits those who seek it. It’s a good etiquette to rush to serve and assist your teachers. I remember seeing this with Shaykh al-Uthaymeen and Shaykh al-Shanqeeti. Students would compete to bring the chairs, the water, and the books, making sure everything was prepared for the class. When Shaykh al-Uthaymeen used to teach on the roof of the Haram in Mecca, we would arrive after Asr to reserve our spots, staying in the sun until Taraweeh to make sure we were in the front row. Why? Because if we moved, someone would take our spot, and we wanted to sit in front of the Shaykh. One night, we heard the class was going to be moved downstairs, so we rushed down. Then, when we heard it was going back upstairs, we rushed back up, only to hear again that it would be downstairs. We ended up running up and down multiple times, all for the chance to sit close to the Shaykh.

Avoiding Unnecessary Differences in Knowledge

If you wish to learn, do not lend your ear to the differences between people, for this will only confuse you and tire your mind. Today, many people, when they start learning, immediately jump into controversial issues. That’s not how you start your path of knowledge. You begin with the basics, with what is clear and foundational. Don’t start with the debates between scholars on complex issues. You don’t need to focus on who said what about a particular issue before you even understand the essentials. For instance, when people start asking about whether the meat and chicken they buy is halal, I ask them, “Do you know how to properly perform wudu first?” Let’s start with what is basic and foundational before moving on to controversial matters.

Prioritizing the Knowledge That Benefits in the Afterlife

You should take the best of everything because life is too short, and you must put most of your energy into learning the noblest of all sciences, namely the knowledge that pertains to the afterlife. This knowledge is your pathway to certainty, the certainty gained by Abu Bakr al-Siddiq, for whom Allah’s Messenger ﷺ testified, saying, “Abu Bakr has not preceded you by constant fasting or prayer. He has preceded you with something that has settled in his breast.”

While the hadith about Abu Bakr al-Siddiq being superior due to what was settled in his heart is weak and generally disputed, it’s undisputed that his iman was stronger than anyone else’s. The Prophet ﷺ entrusted him with leadership over the Ummah because of his strong faith. We learn from this that knowledge should lead us to stronger faith and certainty, which ultimately prepares us for the hereafter.

Next, we’ll start learning about the etiquette of the teacher towards the student. Today, we covered the etiquette of the student towards the teacher. Next time, we’ll discuss the responsibilities of the teacher in relation to the student, insha’Allah. Let’s move on to the next book.

The Importance of Following the Sunnah and Avoiding Innovation (Bid’ah)

This is book number five from the Forty Hadith of Imam al-Nawawi, from Ibn Rajab’s explanation of the hadith. The hadith from Aisha states: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Whoever introduces into this affair of ours something that is not part of it, it is rejected.” This is reported by al-Bukhari and Muslim. In another narration from Muslim, it says, “Whoever does an action that is not based on our affair, it is rejected.” Both versions are reported in the two Sahihs, and while the wording differs slightly, the meanings are very close to each other.

This hadith is one of the most valuable in terms of judging actions. Why? Because it lays out a key principle: if someone introduces something into our religion that isn’t part of it, then that action is rejected. It ties directly to the earlier hadith about intentions. The first hadith we studied focused on the internal aspect of our actions—our intentions—while this one focuses on the external aspect, the actual practice of those actions. Just as sincerity is necessary for an action to be rewarded, the outward action must be in accordance with the teachings of Islam for it to be accepted.

Two Pillars for an Action to Be Accepted

The principle here is clear: whoever introduces something into our religion that is not part of it, meaning they innovate something new in religious practice, that action is rejected. There are two key conditions for any action to be accepted: first, it must be sincerely done for the sake of Allah, and second, it must be in accordance with the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ. If either of these conditions is missing, the action is invalid, no matter how well-intended it might be.

For example, someone could sincerely pray every time they enter their house, believing that it’s a good act of worship. But because this act is not something the Prophet ﷺ did, even with good intentions, it is an innovation and therefore rejected. On the other hand, someone might perform all the external acts of worship but do so for show or to gain praise from others. In that case, the action is invalid because the sincerity is missing.

The Importance of Sincerity and Following the Prophet’s Example

We live in a time when many people are very sincere in their love for the religion and their acts of worship, but they may not follow the sunnah in their practices. They might argue that their actions are done out of love for the Prophet ﷺ, but if those actions are not in line with his teachings, they are innovations. It is important to note that emotions cannot override the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ. Just because something feels right doesn’t mean it is right in the eyes of Allah.

Everyone who introduces something new into the religion, for which Allah and His Messenger have not given permission, has nothing to do with the deen. This principle is clear, and it is supported by many other hadith. For example, in the hadith of al-Irbad ibn Sariyah, the Prophet ﷺ said, “Whoever among you lives after me will see many differences, so you must hold fast to my sunnah and the sunnah of the rightly guided caliphs after me. Bite onto it with your molar teeth. Beware of newly introduced matters, for every newly introduced matter is an innovation, and every innovation is misguidance.”

What Is Bid’ah?

Let’s talk a bit more about innovations. The word “bid’ah” comes from the root word meaning to create something without precedent. When Allah describes Himself as the creator of the heavens and the earth, He uses the word “bid’ah” because He created them without any prior example. So in its literal sense, bid’ah means an innovation or a newly introduced matter. However, when we talk about bid’ah in a religious context, it refers specifically to introducing something new into the religion, especially as an act of worship, that is not based on the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ.

There are two types of bid’ah: bid’ah in matters of religion and bid’ah in worldly matters. In religious matters, bid’ah could be introducing new forms of worship, new practices, or changing the established ways of performing acts of worship.

Examples of Religious Bid’ah

For example, some people celebrate the birthday of the Prophet ﷺ, saying, “We are just praising the Prophet.” But is there anything wrong with praising the Prophet ﷺ? No, there isn’t. In fact, we are commanded to send salawat upon the Prophet ﷺ. However, doing so in a specific way, at a specific time, as part of a newly introduced celebration, makes it a bid’ah because it was not something the Prophet ﷺ or his companions practiced.

Another example is when a man sneezed in front of Ibn Umar and said, “Alhamdulillah wa salatu wa salamu ‘ala Rasulillah.” Ibn Umar corrected him, saying, “This is not what we were taught to say after sneezing.” Even though there is nothing wrong with sending salawat on the Prophet ﷺ, doing so after sneezing makes it a bid’ah because it introduces something new into the practice of sneezing, which the Prophet ﷺ did not do.

Types of Bid’ah

The scholars explain that bid’ah can occur in six different areas: the cause, the type, the amount, the manner, the time, and the place.

The cause: Doing an act of worship for a reason that was not established in the sunnah. For example, praying two rak’ahs every time you enter your house would be a bid’ah because there is no established cause for this action.

The type: Using something that is not sanctioned in worship, such as sacrificing an animal that is not allowed for sacrifice during Eid. Even if it’s a valuable animal, if it’s not one of the types allowed for sacrifice, it’s a bid’ah.

The amount: Increasing or decreasing the number of times you perform an act of worship. For example, washing your limbs five times during wudu instead of three, believing that it’s better, is a bid’ah because it goes against the established sunnah.

The manner: Changing the way an act of worship is performed, such as making wudu in reverse order, is a bid’ah because it alters the established practice.

The time: Performing an act of worship at a time that was not prescribed. For example, performing the sacrifice for Eid before the salah is a bid’ah because it must be done after the prayer.

The place: Performing an act of worship in a place where it wasn’t intended to be performed. For instance, performing i’tikaf in your home instead of in the mosque is a bid’ah because the sunnah specifies that i’tikaf should be done in the mosque.

Examples from the Companions

An example from the time of the companions is when Abu Musa al-Ash’ari saw a group of people sitting in circles, counting pebbles, and making dhikr together in unison. He was appalled by the sight and went to Abdullah ibn Mas’ud, who reprimanded them, saying, “Either you are following a sunnah better than the sunnah of Muhammad ﷺ, or you are upon a path of misguidance.”

Finally, it’s important to remember that the basic rule in worldly matters is that everything is permissible unless proven otherwise. However, when it comes to religious matters, the default is that everything is forbidden unless there is evidence to support it. This is why when someone introduces something new in worship and asks for evidence that it’s wrong, we must remind them that the burden of proof is on them to show that their action is part of the sunnah.

In summary, bid’ah is any newly introduced practice in religious matters that was not part of the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ. It can happen in one of six ways: the cause, type, amount, manner, time, or place of an act of worship. It’s essential to stick to the sunnah and avoid innovations, no matter how well-intentioned they may be. As the Prophet ﷺ said, “Every innovation is misguidance.”

Q&A 1. Why is it important to purify your heart before seeking knowledge?

• Answer: Purifying your heart is essential because knowledge is like a form of worship, and just as worship requires physical purity, the heart needs to be free from bad intentions and negative traits to truly absorb and retain knowledge.

2. What are some examples of distractions that can hinder a student from focusing on learning?

• Answer: Common distractions today include social media, constant phone usage, and entertainment. Even permissible (halal) distractions can divert your focus from learning if they are excessive.

3. How should a student of knowledge approach their teacher, and why is this relationship compared to that of a patient and a doctor?

• Answer: A student should trust their teacher’s judgment, be humble, and serve their teacher respectfully, just as a patient trusts and follows a doctor’s guidance. This trust is crucial for effective learning, especially at the beginning.

4. What are two key attitudes that can prevent someone from gaining knowledge?

• Answer: Arrogance and bashfulness. Arrogance makes someone think they are too good to learn from others, and bashfulness makes them too shy to ask questions, both of which can impede learning.

5. What does the term “bid’ah” mean, and why is it considered dangerous in religious practices?

• Answer: Bid’ah refers to introducing new practices into religion that were not part of the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ. It is dangerous because it deviates from the established sunnah, and every act of worship must align with the Prophet’s teachings to be accepted by Allah.

6. What are the two key conditions for an action of worship to be accepted?

• Answer: The action must be done sincerely for the sake of Allah, and it must be in accordance with the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ.

7. Can you give an example of a bid’ah related to worship?

• Answer: An example would be celebrating the Prophet’s ﷺ birthday with specific religious rituals, which was not practiced by the Prophet or his companions. Although sending salawat is good, creating new celebrations around it is a bid’ah.

8. How does the concept of bid’ah apply to the cause, type, amount, manner, time, and place of worship?

• Answers:
• Cause: Doing an act of worship for a reason not prescribed by the sunnah (e.g., praying for a specific cause not taught by the Prophet ﷺ).
• Type: Using an unapproved method or object for worship (e.g., sacrificing an animal not allowed for sacrifice).
• Amount: Changing the prescribed number of times an act is done (e.g., washing limbs five times in wudu instead of three).
• Manner: Performing an act of worship in a way that deviates from the sunnah (e.g., reversing the steps of wudu).
• Time: Performing worship at a time that’s not prescribed (e.g., making the Eid sacrifice before prayer).
• Place: Doing worship in a place not recommended (e.g., performing i’tikaf at home instead of the mosque).

9. Why is it important to avoid focusing on controversial issues early in your journey of learning?

• Answer: Focusing on controversies too early can confuse a student and divert them from mastering the foundational knowledge that is essential for deeper understanding later. It’s important to first gain a strong base in clear, undisputed matters before engaging in complex debates.

10. How does adhering to the sunnah help prevent bid’ah?

• Answer: Adhering to the sunnah ensures that our practices align with the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ, leaving no room for unnecessary or unapproved innovations in worship, thus protecting the integrity of our religious practices.

The post Study Classical Texts the Traditional Way | Session 9 appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.

Israel has failed to destroy the spirit of solidarity.

Even the old methods of delivering babies are undermined by Israel’s genocidal violence that has left Gaza's health sector in tatters.

Reading Time

• Summary Transcript: 3~ minutes
• Full Transcript: 30~ minutes

Learning Objectives

• Understand the Hierarchy of Knowledge
  • Identify the highest form of knowledge according to Ibn Qudamah, which focuses on understanding Allah, His attributes, and the afterlife.
  • Differentiate between praiseworthy knowledge and knowledge that serves communal obligations (fard kifayah).
• Apply the Concept of Self-Purification
  • Recognize the importance of self-purification and personal spiritual development before guiding or helping others.
  • Explain how traits such as greed, jealousy, and vanity impact spiritual growth and how they can be addressed.
• Comprehend Islamic Rulings on Abortion
  • Articulate the Islamic rulings on abortion as presented by Ibn Qudamah, particularly focusing on the stages of pregnancy and the role of qadar.
  • Evaluate when abortion is permissible in Islam, and the importance of considering individual circumstances.
• Grasp the Role of Qadr (Divine Decree) and Human Free Will
  • Understand the balance between divine decree (qadr) and human free will, and how individuals are responsible for their actions within the framework of Allah’s knowledge.
  • Demonstrate the importance of focusing on present actions rather than worrying about what Allah has decreed.
• Emphasize Consistency in Good Deeds
  • Explain why consistency in good deeds is crucial for ensuring a positive spiritual ending.
  • Discuss the concept of one’s fate being sealed based on their final actions, and the importance of maintaining righteousness throughout life.
• Prioritize the Study of Qur’an and Sunnah
  • Justify why the Qur’an and Sunnah should be the foundational sources of knowledge for a Muslim, as recommended by Ibn Qudamah.
  • Outline supplementary disciplines (e.g., tafsir, abrogation) that enhance understanding of these sacred texts.
• Discern the Dangers of Misusing Knowledge
  • Identify the negative consequences of using knowledge to win debates or refute others for the sake of pride.
  • Develop a humble approach to knowledge that focuses on personal spiritual growth rather than proving others wrong.
• Balance Fear and Hope in Spiritual Practice
  • Describe how to balance fear of a bad ending with hope in Allah’s mercy, and apply this balance to personal religious practice.
  • Explore strategies for maintaining humility while striving for a good ending in both actions and intentions.

Class Summary

The Importance of Pursuing Praiseworthy Knowledge and Spiritual Growth

In our journey through Imam Ibn Qudamah’s Muhtasar Minhaj al-Qasidin, we are reminded of the significance of seeking knowledge that deepens our connection to Allah and brings us closer to happiness in the afterlife. The lessons outlined by Ibn Qudamah encourage a balance between personal spiritual growth and communal responsibilities. Let’s explore these key teachings.

Knowledge That Brings Us Closer to Allah

The highest form of knowledge, as Imam Ibn Qudamah explains, is knowledge about Allah, His attributes, and His wisdom in creating the afterlife to follow this world. This knowledge is pursued for its own sake, and it’s a never-ending journey—one that leads to eternal happiness. In contrast, any knowledge that doesn’t serve this ultimate purpose, such as mundane studies that don’t increase your spirituality, can be considered a waste of time.

The Two Types of Knowledge

Knowledge is categorized into two main types:

1. Praiseworthy Knowledge: This refers to knowledge about Allah, which brings a person closer to Him. It is essential and should be the main pursuit for anyone seeking spiritual growth.
2. Knowledge That Supports Other Learning: Certain types of knowledge, such as those related to communal obligations, should be learned but only to a limited extent. These support your ultimate goal but should not take over your primary focus on understanding Allah.

Focus on Self-Purification First

Ibn Qudamah emphasizes that before trying to guide or correct others, one must focus on their own spiritual purification. Traits such as greed, jealousy, and vanity should be worked on diligently. Trying to fix others before fixing yourself is like ignoring a fire in your own home while trying to put out fires elsewhere. True spiritual success comes from inner transformation first.

Abortion in Islam: A Case-by-Case Approach

The text also discusses Islamic rulings on abortion, particularly concerning when it is permissible. Scholars agree that after 120 days, when the soul has been breathed into the fetus, abortion is not allowed except in cases where the mother’s life is at risk or the fetus is confirmed to be dead. For pregnancies less than 120 days, there is more flexibility, but it remains a sensitive case-by-case decision that must consider individual circumstances.

Understanding Qadr (Divine Decree)

Ibn Qudamah also delves into the concept of qadr, or divine decree, explaining that while Allah knows everything—past, present, and future—humans still have free will. It’s our responsibility to make the best choices with the options Allah has provided. Rather than worrying about what Allah knows, we should focus on making the right decisions in the present.

Consistency in Good Deeds and the Importance of a Good Ending

One critical lesson from Ibn Qudamah is the need for consistency in good deeds. It’s not enough to start well—you must strive to end well, too. A person may perform good deeds their entire life but lose their way in the end, and vice versa. Therefore, humility and persistence in doing what pleases Allah are key to ensuring a good ending.

Full Transcript

Alhamdulillah Rabbil Alameen, salallahu wa sallam wa barakatuhu wa nabiyyin wa muhammadin wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa sallam wa tasliman kathira. Welcome back to this very special session from Ta’seel that’s happening remotely this time, from the book of Imam Ibn Qudamah, Muhtasar Minhaj al-Qasidin.

The Importance of Knowledge and Terminology

In this book, we’ve been studying together the chapters on the subject of knowledge. Last week, if you remember, we talked about different terminologies used in describing knowledge and different levels. Unfortunately, these have been misused because they’ve been watered down or maybe given a different meaning to them, such as the word “fiqh,” for example, which is supposed to mean the understanding of one’s relationship with Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala. Rather, now we use it as understanding what is right, what is haram, and what is halal in terms of matters of fiqh and furu’ (branches).

The subject of ilm (knowledge), which people now think of as being strong in debating masa’il (issues) of fiqh and usool (principles), has also been altered. Imam Ibn Qudamah refers to true ilm as understanding Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala’s ayat and His amazing creation, and tawheed (the oneness of Allah). Many of these terminologies have been changed.

The Praiseworthy Disciplines of Knowledge

Now, he is moving to a new chapter called “The Praiseworthy Disciplines,” or Fasl fil Uloom al-Mahmoodah. What are these uloom (sciences) that are considered mahmoodah (praiseworthy), which Muslims, especially students of knowledge, need to aspire to learn?

Some of these uloom are praiseworthy, and from the title, it’s clear that some disciplines of knowledge are not praiseworthy. In fact, they’re not even supposed to be counted as part of knowledge. Let’s see what Imam Ibn Qudamah says about the praiseworthy disciplines that he encourages you and me to learn, insha’Allah ta’ala.

The Highest Form of Knowledge: Knowledge of Allah

Bismillah. Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim.

Imam Ibn Qudamah says, “Know that praiseworthy knowledge is of two types. Number one: knowledge that deserves the utmost praise. The more one possesses it, the better. This is the knowledge about Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, His attributes (sifat), actions (af’al), and His wisdom in making the afterlife follow this world. This is knowledge sought for its own sake and knowledge that leads to happiness (sa’adah) in the afterlife. It is the bottomless ocean. Men can only circle around its shores and edges to the best of their ability.”

At the beginning of this introduction, Imam Ibn Qudamah is not providing any specific details in terms of what particular discipline you need to follow. He gives you the big spectrum first. He says, “Look, the number one ilm that you need to pursue is the one that brings you closer to Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, and that’s the one you need in this dunya and in the akhirah.”

He says, “Al-ilmu billah (knowledge of Allah), to have knowledge about Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala.” He quotes the ayah of Allah, “Fa’lam annahu la ilaha illallah” (Know that there is no god but Allah), which means learn and pursue that knowledge. Even learning about Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala is part of our duty. He says you should know about Allah’s oneness, His beautiful attributes, His actions, and His wisdom in making this dunya and akhirah—understanding the purpose and meaning as it should be.

He continues, “Qal fa’inna hadha ilmu matloob li thaatihi.” This knowledge is sought for its own sake, meaning the reward is inherent in the pursuit. The more you learn about Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, the more you will hopefully have that khashiyah (reverence) that we talked about in previous sessions. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala says, Innama yakhsha Allah min ibadihi ulama (It is only those who have knowledge among His servants that fear Allah). Those who truly fear Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala are the ulama—those who are conscious of Him.

The more conscious you are of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, the more you adopt ihsan (excellence). That is, you worship Allah as if you see Him. And if you’re not at that level, then you know that Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala sees you. Imam Ibn Qudamah says that this is the ilm you need to spend most of your life studying. He implies that this ilm has no limit. You’ll continue living your life pursuing this ilm.

He also says that any knowledge you pursue that doesn’t feed into this purpose is a waste of time. Whether you’re studying Arabic language, tajweed, or even matters of dunya like medicine or law, if that knowledge doesn’t make you more religious or spiritual, then you’re missing the point of everything. He’s bringing us back to the purpose of seeking knowledge.

Applying Knowledge in Practice

So, keep in mind, brothers and sisters, as we study this ilm and knowledge, that if what you’re studying right now isn’t bringing you closer to Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, then you’re missing the point. Keep the goal in mind: to know more about Allah azza wa jal, His beautiful names, and His attributes. This will reflect in your life and help you understand the purpose of why Allah created the dunya before the akhirah. Following His instructions brings you sa’adah (eternal bliss).

That’s the first ilm that is praiseworthy, or mahmood. Now, let’s see what he says about the second type of knowledge.

The Second Type of Knowledge: Necessary but Limited

Knowledge that is praised only to a certain degree. This is the previously mentioned knowledge needed in fulfilling communal obligations (fard kifayah). Knowledge of all communal obligations is needed, but it can be studied either according to need or exhaustively.

Imam Ibn Qudamah says, “Look, we talked about the first ilm, which is the ultimate knowledge you’re looking for. But then there are many other aspects of knowledge that lead to that first one.” He says that you shouldn’t put too much energy into this ilm. He says, La al-‘ulum allati la yuhmad minha illa miqdar makhsoos (Only a certain amount of these types of knowledge is praiseworthy). You only need a certain amount of this knowledge that will act as a catalyst or stepping stone to reach the ultimate knowledge about Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala. He doesn’t mention any specific disciplines but refers to the previously mentioned knowledge.

He says some disciplines of knowledge require iftikar (a little bit of knowledge to get by), while others require iqtisar(medium effort). Then there are those that require istiqsa’ (extensive research and deep study). Every discipline is different. He advises against delving too deep into a discipline that only requires a little knowledge. You don’t want to waste your time focusing too much on it.

Purifying the Self Before Engaging in Da’wah

Imam Ibn Qudamah says you should be one of two people: either someone who is busy working on themselves or someone who has worked on themselves and now devotes themselves to helping others. He warns against focusing on fixing others before fixing yourself. You must work on purifying your inner self from negative characteristics like greed, jealousy, ostentation, and vanity before focusing on outward conduct.

This concept will be discussed in the section on destructive flaws. He advises that if you haven’t completed this internal work, don’t engage in communal obligations because others can do that. A person who ruins themselves while trying to fix others is a fool. They are like someone who has scorpions in their sleeves but focuses on driving flies away from others.

SubhanAllah, this is a beautiful point from Imam Ibn Qudamah, which is, of course, an extension of Imam Ghazali’s work. He’s not just giving information but linking it to spirituality. You need to seek knowledge, but some of it is more important than others.

The Dangers of Ignoring Personal Spiritual Work

He says you need to be one of two people: either busy working on yourself or someone who has worked on themselves and now helps others. What does that mean? Purify your soul. If you’ve studied the meaning of tahajjud but don’t pray it, you’re missing the point. If you know the value of fasting on Mondays and Thursdays but aren’t doing it, or you know the purpose of giving da’wah but aren’t giving it, you’re missing the point.

You need to work on yourself first. This knowledge you’re gaining demands application. If you don’t apply it, it will disappear.

Once you’ve worked on yourself, you can start helping others. But don’t be someone who is ruined from the inside, trying to fix everything around them. Unfortunately, many of us do this because it’s easier to see the results in others than in ourselves. It takes much more energy to work on waking up for fajr or abstaining from haram, but inviting others to do the same can feel easier.

Also, sometimes it comes from arrogance or ignorance. We might look at other people’s faults while pretending we have none, or we might truly not see our own. This is why it’s important to focus on yourself first. Greed, jealousy, ostentation, and vanity—these are traits that will eat away at your good deeds and spiritual energy.

Balancing Personal Purification and Da’wah

If you can’t focus completely on fixing yourself and others, then don’t start engaging in communal obligations. Don’t start studying Arabic grammar or different qira’at when you still struggle with jealousy or arrogance. Work on your heart first.

I want to clarify something here. You might think, “Wait, if that’s the case, I’ll never be able to give da’wah because I’m not perfect.” But you don’t need to be perfect to give da’wah. We are all human and imperfect. Human perfection means that when you make a mistake, you fix it. This is the principle behind Imam Ibn Taymiyyah’s stance when asked about giving da’wah while having faults.

For example, someone who smokes might feel hypocritical talking about the harms of smoking. But they still have an obligation to stop smoking and to give da’wah about its harms. These are two separate obligations: giving da’wah and making tawbah. You can’t abandon one because you’re struggling with the other. As long as you feel guilt and have the intention to fix your fault, you can still give da’wah. But if you are desensitized and feel no shame in your fault, then speaking against it becomes hypocritical.

So be mindful of this balance. Imam Ibn Qudamah says, “If you’re finished with purifying your inner self—and what a far-fetched goal that is—then focus on communal obligations, but proceed gradually.” He acknowledges that complete purification is a far-fetched goal, but to the best of your ability, you should move on to other pursuits once you’ve made progress on yourself.

Now, he’s going to give more detailed guidance on what disciplines to focus on and where to start. Keep in mind that this is according to his time, more than a millennium ago. Since then, scholars have reorganized knowledge, so some disciplines might not be mentioned here.

Knowledge of the Qur’an and Sunnah

Start with the Book of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, then move to the Sunnah of His Messenger, salallahu alayhi wa sallam. Then learn the sciences of the Qur’an, such as tafsir, knowledge of abrogating and abrogated verses, and clear and ambiguous verses. The same applies to the Sunnah. After this, focus on communal obligations.

The first knowledge you need to busy yourself with is knowledge related to the Qur’an and the Sunnah of the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam. We’ve already talked about how these are the ultimate sources of knowledge because they are the sacred words of Allah and the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam. Study them for their own virtue.

To better understand the Qur’an and the Sunnah, study supplementary disciplines like tafsir (interpretation of the Qur’an), abrogation (understanding which rulings were replaced by later ones), and muhkam (unequivocal verses). These are sciences that will help you better comprehend the sacred texts.

When it comes to Sunnah, you’ll also need supplementary sciences to understand the hadith of the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam. In academia today, students often specialize in one particular issue or chapter, but Imam Ibn Qudamah advises against this. Diversify your fields of knowledge. Don’t go too deep into non-necessary disciplines. If you read one book or attend one lecture, that’s enough.

Refuting Others for Show Is Dangerous

There are many people today, especially on social media, who focus on refuting others rather than gaining substantial knowledge. They spend their time debating and trying to put others down. But Imam Ibn Qudamah warns against using knowledge just to win debates. It destroys the soul. Shaytan will always provide justifications for this behavior, but there’s no end to it. Be careful about what you focus on, because it will shape how you are judged.

The Creation Process and the Concept of Abortion

Imam Ibn Qudamah discusses the process of creation, explaining how Allah sends an angel to breathe the soul into a child in the womb. The soul comes from heaven and must be nurtured with heavenly sources. The angel is also commanded to register four things: provision, deeds, lifespan, and whether the person will be successful or miserable.

We’ve covered this process before, but now we’re going to discuss a contemporary issue: abortion. We won’t cover everything in detail, but we’ll discuss enough to understand the Islamic rulings. One important thing to understand about abortion is that it’s a case-by-case issue. There are general rules, but fatwas (Islamic rulings) must consider individual circumstances.

Imam Ibn Rajab, rahimahullah, says that a group of fuqaha (Islamic jurists) allowed women to abort what is in their wombs as long as the soul has not yet been breathed into it. They regarded this as equivalent to the withdrawal method of contraception (known as al-azl), where a man withdraws before ejaculation to avoid conception. This opinion was held by some fuqaha, but there are refutations to it.

This is a weak position because the embryo is already a child that is forming. With withdrawal, there is no child at all—it only prevents the start of conception. The Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam, said about withdrawal that there is nothing wrong with it, but if Allah wills for a child to be conceived, it will happen regardless.

Some fuqaha also declare that once the embryo becomes a blood clot, the woman is not permitted to abort it. This is because the child has already begun the process of coagulation and is forming into a human being.

Abortion Rulings in Different Stages of Pregnancy

As opposed to a drop which has not yet begun to coagulate and may not knit together as a child. Based on what we learned earlier from last week, we said that according to the hadith of Ibn Mas’ud, radiAllahu anhu, 40 days will be in the form of a drop, 40 days in the form of a clot, and 40 days in the form of a morsel (mudgha). Based on this, the scholars say as long as the child has not yet formed, now the question arises: how long does it take for the embryo to form before we can say it starts taking the shape of a human being?

This is where the Hanbali school of thought differs, and we will see what the classical scholars say about this and then discuss when it’s considered a formed being. But before we get into that, I want to present the three opinions regarding the subject of abortion. These opinions are based on whether the embryo is considered alive or not.

The Three Opinions Regarding Abortion

All scholars agree that after 120 days, meaning after the full four months (three phases of 40 days each), the child is considered a living being. Some Hanbali scholars even say it takes 130 days, adding ten more days. After four months, you cannot abort a child under any circumstances unless for two reasons:

1. If the pregnancy endangers the life of the mother, in which case abortion is permitted to save her life.
2. If the child is proven to be dead in the womb, in which case the pregnancy must be terminated.

Beyond these two reasons, abortion is not permitted after four months. Another significant discussion among scholars today involves cases of severe fetal deformities. If a child is diagnosed with a severe, life-threatening deformity, can the parents abort? Scholars agree that after four months, when the child is alive, you cannot abort due to deformities. This is seen as a test from Allah to the parents. There are also cases where medical diagnoses of deformities might not be accurate, and some children are born perfectly healthy despite the initial diagnosis. So, terminating the pregnancy based on a potential diagnosis would be devastating for the parents.

The second case for abortion involves the period between the first 40 days and 120 days, before the soul is breathed into the fetus. Most scholars say that you cannot abort a child after the first 40 days. They argue that after this point, the child starts taking shape as a human being. This belief aligns with modern scientific understanding, where fetal development becomes more distinct after the first few weeks.

Abortion Within the First 40 Days

The first 40 days offer more leniency for abortion, especially when pregnancy might occur despite contraceptive measures, such as taking pills. However, scholars still have a strong opposition to abortion even in the first 40 days unless there is a valid reason. These are the general rules, but as mentioned earlier, each case must be examined individually. You cannot give a blanket fatwa (ruling) to everyone.

Let’s move on to page 71. One person interpreted that the angel divides up the drop when it becomes a clot into different portions, some of which become skin, some flesh, and some bones, all of which is decreed before its existence. But this contradicts the outward meaning of the hadith, which implies that the angel forms and creates all of these parts, though this creation and division could happen before the actual formation of the flesh and bones.

Now, I want to comment on this. The Arabic text says, qal ba’duhum, meaning “some say,” but the translation says “one person.” This is a mistranslation because it wasn’t just one person. The scholars were discussing various opinions on how the body forms, so it’s important to understand that this was a general scholarly view.

Secondly, we need to remember that the statements of the scholars about fetal development are not sacred. They’re based on the best scientific knowledge available at the time. The Qur’an gives a perfectly accurate description of human development, but these scholars were giving their interpretation based on what they knew. Today, we have modern science and experimentation that provide more accurate details about fetal development. We use modern knowledge to understand the hadith of the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam, not the other way around.

So don’t cling to old descriptions of development as if they are divine revelations. Instead, apply modern scientific understanding to help explain these hadith. We believe the Qur’an and hadith will always align with the truth about Allah’s creation. Scholars in the past made rulings based on what they understood about fetal development, but today, with more knowledge, some of these rulings might be adapted or revised. Let’s continue on page 73.

Miscarriage and its Legal Implications

A group of scholars took a position based on the outward meaning of the hadith of Ibn Mas’ud. They said that the shortest period in which the form of a child becomes clear is 81 days, meaning after two of the three 40-day stages (drop and clot), because the child does not become a fully formed morsel until the third stage.

This leads to some practical rulings. For example, if a woman miscarries before 81 days, the miscarriage is not treated as a fully formed human being. She would not be required to perform janazah (funeral prayer) for the fetus. If the miscarriage happens after 81 days and the fetus has formed, then the scholars would consider the miscarriage a premature delivery of a human being, and janazah would be performed.

These rulings also apply in matters of divorce. For instance, if a woman is pregnant and then miscarries before 81 days, her waiting period (iddah) is not considered over. But if she miscarries after 81 days, the iddah would end with the miscarriage because it is considered a delivery.

As you can see, these details of fetal development have implications for Islamic rulings. A woman’s iddah period, funeral rites, and other technical rulings depend on how we understand the stages of development. Now, let’s move to page 75, where we continue this discussion.

The Rulings After Four Months of Pregnancy

Imam Ahmad, rahimahullah, based his well-known position on the apparent meaning of the hadith of Ibn Mas’ud, that the soul is breathed into the fetus after four months (120 days). Therefore, if a fetus is miscarried after four months, the funeral prayer must be performed because the soul had already been breathed into it. This position was also held by Sa’id ibn al-Musayyib, and it’s one of the two positions held by Imam al-Shafi’i and Imam Ishaq.

Imam Ahmad says that if a child is born after four months, even if it’s a miscarriage, we must treat it as a full human being and perform the janazah for it. But if the miscarriage happens before the four months, then there’s no need for the janazah. The fetus is not considered fully formed, and there’s no need to wash the body or perform the funeral rites.

The Divine Decree and the Individual’s Fate

Now, let’s move on to page 79, where we conclude this discussion. Imam Ibn Rajab, rahimahullah, talks about the last portion of the hadith, referring to the qadr (decree) of each individual. He explains how the decree of each person is written.

In any case, this writing, which is written for the embryo in its mother’s womb, is not the same as the writing of the general decree that occurred when Allah created all creatures. Allah says, Nothing occurs, either in the earth or in yourselves, without it being in a book before We make it happen. And as is mentioned in Sahih Muslim from Abdullah ibn Amr, from the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam: “Truly Allah decreed the destinies of creatures 50,000 years before He created the heavens and the earth.” In the hadith of Ubadah ibn As-Samit, the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “The first thing Allah created was the pen, and He said to it, ‘Write.’ So it proceeded to write everything that is to be until the Day of Judgment.”

The Complexity of Qadr and Human Responsibility

This leads many people to ask: If Allah knows everything, and He knows whether we will be in Jannah or Jahannam, why do we go through the process? The answer is that Allah’s knowledge is ultimate, and He knows what happened in the past and what will happen in the future. Understanding qadr properly involves breaking it down into four elements:

1. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala has ultimate knowledge.
2. Allah gave the order for that knowledge to be written.
3. Allah has the divine will (irada) to allow events to happen.
4. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala creates the actions, meaning He facilitates for you what you intend to do.

Our concern should not be what Allah knows about us but rather what we are doing with the knowledge and free will that we have. Allah has given us choices, and our job is to ensure that our actions align with what Allah has decreed for us in the best way possible. As the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “Do not worry about this. Everyone will be facilitated to what has been decreed for them.”

The Importance of Consistency and a Good Ending

There’s a portion of the hadith that mentions someone might be doing the acts of the people of Jannah until they’re a hand span away from it, and then qadr catches up with them, and they end up in Jahannam. Some scholars say these are the words of Ibn Mas’ud, while others say these are the words of the Prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam. This serves as a reminder that we need to be consistent in our deeds because there is always a chance that people might change.

We should never assume we’re guaranteed Jannah just because we’re doing good now. We need to remain humble and consistent, as only Allah knows our future. Similarly, we shouldn’t judge people who seem destined for Jahannam now because Allah may guide their hearts and change their fate. Ultimately, deeds are judged by their conclusion.

Imam Ibn Rajab summarizes this discussion by saying that concluding actions reflect what was preordained. The righteous people of the first generations used to be terrified of an evil conclusion. They were more focused on how their lives would end than how they were living in the present. Sufyan al-Thawri, rahimahullah, was known to weep out of fear that iman (faith) might be taken from him before death. He used to say, “I am afraid that in the core of the book, I am preordained as unfortunate.”

Balancing Fear and Hope in Allah

But it’s important to balance this fear with hope. We don’t want to be overwhelmed by the fear of a bad ending to the point that we feel paralyzed. Yes, we should be concerned about how our lives will end, but we should also focus on doing the best we can in the present.

The best way to ensure a good ending is to live a life that pleases Allah today. If we strive for excellence and consistency, insha’Allah, when the time comes for our deeds to be sealed, it will be sealed with something beautiful.

This brings us to the final point. We shouldn’t concern ourselves with what Allah knows about us or our qadr. Instead, we should focus on the actions available to us today and make the best use of them. Allah has given us guidance through the Qur’an and Sunnah, and as long as we stay on the right path, insha’Allah, we will meet Allah while He is pleased with us.

Insha’Allah, next week we will study hadith number five, which is extremely important as it discusses the meaning of bid’ah (innovation). We will also continue with the book of Ibn Qudamah on the subject of knowledge.

Q&A

1.  What is the highest form of knowledge according to Ibn Qudamah?
   • The highest form of knowledge is knowledge about Allah, His attributes, actions, and His wisdom in making the afterlife follow this world. This knowledge leads to happiness in the afterlife and is pursued for its own sake.
2. How does Ibn Qudamah categorize knowledge?
   •  He categorizes knowledge into two types:
     • Praiseworthy knowledge that brings a person closer to Allah.
     • Knowledge that is necessary but limited, which supports communal obligations (fard kifayah).
3. Why does Ibn Qudamah emphasize self-purification before helping others?
   •  He believes that one must purify their own soul from negative traits such as greed, jealousy, and vanity before focusing on fixing others. This prevents hypocrisy and ensures that knowledge is applied correctly.
4. What are the Islamic rulings on abortion as discussed by Ibn Qudamah?
   • Abortion is prohibited after 120 days of pregnancy, except if the mother’s life is at risk or the fetus is confirmed dead. Before 120 days, there is some flexibility, but abortion must be considered on a case-by-case basis.
5. What does Ibn Qudamah say about qadr (divine decree) and free will?
   • While Allah has ultimate knowledge of everything, humans have free will and must make the best choices with the options provided by Allah. It is important to focus on the present and act righteously rather than worrying about what Allah knows.
6. How does Ibn Qudamah highlight the importance of consistency in good deeds?
   • He warns that a person’s final actions determine their fate. Therefore, consistency in good deeds is crucial to ensure a good ending, as it’s possible to live righteously but lose one’s way toward the end of life.
7. Why is studying the Qur’an and Sunnah emphasized as the starting point for seeking knowledge?
   •  Ibn Qudamah teaches that knowledge of the Qur’an and Sunnah should be the foundation of all learning, as these are the sacred words of Allah and His Prophet, and they guide all aspects of life and worship.
8. What is the role of communal obligations (fard kifayah) in Ibn Qudamah’s framework of knowledge?
   • Fard kifayah refers to communal obligations that everyone must learn, but they should be pursued only to the extent necessary, not exhaustively, so as not to divert focus from knowledge that brings one closer to Allah.
9. What does Ibn Qudamah say about debating for the sake of winning arguments?
   • He cautions against using knowledge to win debates or refute others just to show superiority. This attitude can destroy the soul and lead to arrogance, diverting from the true purpose of seeking knowledge, which is spiritual growth.
10. How does Ibn Qudamah suggest balancing fear of a bad ending with hope in Allah’s mercy?
    • He advises maintaining humility and consistently striving for righteousness, while balancing fear of a bad ending with hope in Allah’s mercy. Focus should be on making good choices now to ensure a positive outcome at the end of life.

The post Study Classical Texts the Traditional Way | Session 8 appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.

Palestinian human rights groups say they’ve been ignored by Alice Jill Edwards.

Despite some theological differences, both denominations look to her as an inspiration for cultivating compassion and hope

I had just finished teaching a class on “the Muslim Mary”. Many non-Muslims who attended were puzzled to find out that Muslims had a connection with Mary at all, and had no knowledge of how important she is to our belief and practice. This came as no surprise. Half of Americans report they know “not much” or “nothing at all” about Islam.

As a Muslim girl growing up in the overwhelmingly Catholic state of Rhineland-Palatinate in Germany, Mary was a constant presence in my life. Her images and statues, dotted across my city, smiled at me as I walked to school. At Christmas time, I joined with my classmates to sing songs such as Stille Nacht, heilige Nacht.

Zeyneb Sayılgan is the Muslim Scholar at the Institute for Islamic, Christian and Jewish Studies in Baltimore

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The irony of celebrating the birth of Jesus in the middle of Israel's war of extermination in the land of his birth is not registering among Christmas shoppers.

The winter holiday season is once again here, and as converts to Islam, whether we come from observant or secular Christian backgrounds, it’s often a time of confusion, stress, and loneliness, especially in the early days. As someone who embraced Islam many years ago, I’ve been through, and seen in other converts, a range of approaches to dealing with the season and with the inevitable family drama it can bring, and I hope the lessons learned may help others just starting out on their Muslim journeys.

Can Muslims Celebrate Christmas?

In a word: No! Make no mistake, intentionally celebrating Christmas as a religious holiday to mark the birth of Jesus (peace be upon him) is not something that practising Muslims should be doing. Alhamdulillah Islam is a complete way of worship, and we have our own celebrations to enjoy.

However, nothing in life is black and white, and the lived reality for a convert, especially a new convert, may mean they cannot avoid certain aspects of the holidays. There may be mitigating circumstances for many converts, at least for a year or two after taking shahada. We will look at some of these cases below.

Unless these circumstances apply to you, however, nothing in this article should be taken as a general fatwa permitting the celebration of any holiday not mandated by the Qur’an and Sunnah.

Now that has been made clear, let’s look at a few examples of how converts in different circumstances have dealt with Christmas. These scenarios could of course apply to any religious celebration, such as Diwali, Kwanzaa, Channukah and others.

I’ve converted but haven’t told my parents, and I still live at home…

Many new converts feel a need to hide their Islam from their friends and family at the beginning, and for a variety of reasons. If you fall into this category, especially if you are still living in your family home, then it will be very difficult to avoid participating in the normal activities of the day without arousing suspicion. I’ve heard of converts who picked up Christmas day work shifts for this reason, but that isn’t possible for many. Especially young converts who may be students or otherwise financially dependent on their parents, there really isn’t much choice in the matter.

If this is you, please know that Allah SWT is aware of your circumstances, and He SWT only asks us to worship Him to the best of our ability. You may decide to simply avoid the religious aspect, but engage in the family gathering with the intention of upholding good relations with your loved ones. If your family is religious and you simply can’t avoid church without risk, again Allah SWT knows what is in your heart, avoid what you can (for example, don’t sing the hymns) and ask for Allah’s Mercy over the rest.

I’ve converted and I have children from my first marriage…

Many people assume that if someone converts, their children automatically become Muslim too, but the reality is often very different. It can be very difficult for children who have always celebrated Christmas to understand why their mum or dad no longer wants to. Whether your children are still small, or are teens, it is worth having a discussion with them about your new faith and what it means.

Many converts opt to wean their children off Christmas step by step. One mother I know who came from a devoutly Catholic family planned her children’s transition like this: Year 1, they still decorated and exchanged gifts and visited family, but they did not attend church services. Year 2, they exchanged gifts and visited family, but she didn’t have a tree. Year 3, they agreed together to only visit family for dinner, but kept the gift exchanges for both Eid days instead. In between, she took care to make Ramadan and Eid as special as she could with decorating, food, iftar gatherings and so on to help her children see that they were not ‘losing’ anything in leaving Christmas behind, alhamdulillah.

In the case where the children’s other parent does celebrate the holidays, however, it can be trickier. Again, discussing the issue with your children is important. If your children have not decided to be Muslim with you, you cannot force them to give up Christmas or any other celebration, but you can and should try to involve them in your new religion and community as much as possible, so they can appreciate for themselves its beauty inshaAllah.

I’ve converted and the people I work with celebrate…

The office party, Secret Santa, festive lunches…if your colleagues don’t know you’ve converted, you may feel awkward to suddenly pull out of all the normal yearly activities, especially as many employers view this time of year as a great opportunity for team building.
However, rest assured that all of these activities are not mandatory, and if you don’t want to participate, you should not feel bad about it.

If you are not ready to disclose your new religion to your workplace, it is easy to come up with any excuse not to attend, such as family commitments. If they do know that you are Muslim, a simple, “Thank you but I don’t celebrate Christmas anymore, but have fun!” should suffice.

I’ve converted, but it’s the only time of year I can see my family…

It is unfortunate that much of the West has a calendar centred on this time of year, making it the one time that almost everyone can take holidays and visit loved ones. If you live away from your family and the ‘festive season’ is the only time you can see them all, it can seem cruel to not visit.

I do know of many converts who do attend family gatherings at Christmas for this very reason, but they have the intention of keeping family ties, and consciously consider 25th December to just be a normal day, and they do not give or receive gifts. Others chose to visit the day before or the day after. In any case, avoidance of any religious observance is essential in these circumstances to avoid any doubt, and Allah SWT knows best.

If you opt to not participate and to visit your family at other times, be sure to discuss it with them in a loving and kind manner, reassure them of your plans to visit, and avoid being harsh or bringing religious rulings into the discussion. Be mindful that their view of Islam will be impacted by how we treat them, so always strive to be kind and give da’wah by example inshaAllah.

I’ve converted, and I got married and have small children, and my parents want to give them Christmas presents…

If you’ve spent some time as a single new Muslim choosing to engage with your family over Christmas, you may find that marriage and children will change your perspective somewhat. Building your own family means that now you are not the only person in the equation, and your spouse and children must also be considered.

It is very important before marriage to discuss with your potential spouse how you will navigate issues like holidays with your non-Muslim family. From the start, clearly lay out your mutual expectations, including how much you will expose your future children to. Whatever you decide, discuss it with your family as well so they aren’t blindsided, and hurt, by any changes. Christmas is a time when many grandparents look forward to spoiling their grandchildren, so discussing in advance with your family how they can navigate this with you will avoid bad feelings later on.

If you are already a parent, and you didn’t lay this groundwork, then it is important to approach it from now with love and kindness. If your parents want to give gifts, you don’t need to refuse them, but you can opt to actually give them to your children at another time. You can also encourage your parents to delay the gifts until Eid, and to invite them to celebrate with you at that time inshaAllah. Giving your family members Eid gifts as well can be a good icebreaker in this regard inshaAllah.

I’ve converted, and I’m lonely…

Lastly, we must also acknowledge that Christmas is a time of great nostalgia for many converts, and leaving it can bring loneliness, especially as there can be very little to distract us on the day itself. For those of us who are on our own at this time of year, Christmas day can be very isolating. The best advice is to be proactive in finding something beneficial to do on the day. As most people have the day off, you may find that your local mosque will be hosting a special talk or activity. Many Muslim-owned restaurants will be open, perfect for gathering some friends together for an impromptu social. Reach out to others in your networks who may be alone on that day, you may find many who are also struggling and who will appreciate the gesture.

Finally, for the non-convert Muslims…

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to dealing with this time of year as a new Muslim, and I would remind my born Muslim brothers and sisters to be mindful when talking about Christmas with someone who has recently come into Islam. If they have chosen to navigate their personal circumstances in a specific way, it is not our place to criticise that choice, for they may have circumstances in play that we know nothing about.

Blanket statements about the prohibition of celebrating, or of ‘imitating a people’, while true for most Muslims, are not necessarily practical or feasible for the new convert, especially if their conversion is not public yet. Rather than advice, ask what support they need. Extend a hand of friendship, not an eye of judgement. Your kindness, empathy and understanding could turn a lonely time into one of lasting memories for them inshaAllah.

Related:

[Podcast] Navigating Christmas: Advice to Converts, from Converts | Hazel Gomez & Eman Manigat

Podcast | Ho Ho Haraam | Ustadha Alima Ashfaq

The post I’ve Converted, and It’s Christmas… appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.

Dr. Hussam Abu Safiya says Kamal Adwan hospital faces Israeli threat of forced evacuation.

[This three-part article is a summary of some of my thoughts about the current state of the Western Muslim community – inspired by Jonathan Haidt’s book, the Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions & Bad Ideas are Setting Up a Generation for Failure. Read Part 1 here]

Almost 10 years ago, I bought a book called Adab-ul-Din wal-Dunya, i.e. the Protocols (or etiquettes) of the Afterlife & the Worldly Life. This is a book written by Imam al-Mardawi d: 450 AH, a senior jurist & scholar of tafsir from the Shafi’i school of thought. The first chapter of the book was about what the author described as the most important protocol or etiquette: the intellect. At that point in my studies and spiritual experience, I was genuinely confused. I thought that perhaps Islam, belief in God, or Tawhid, etc should be the first protocols.

However in the years since then, as a teacher and researcher of Islam who works in the community and has a social media presence, I have realized he was absolutely right. Imam al-Mardawi explained that the intellect is where belief in God, the Prophet Muhammad and a sound understanding of the Qur’an and Sunnah starts. Again, he was absolutely right. Never underestimate our luminaries from the past.

Throughout the Qur’an and Sunnah, the importance of knowledge, intellect, and learning is repeatedly emphasized. The revelation of the Qur’an began with the command to ‘read’. The Qur’an itself is a book that requires knowledge of the Arabic language, the Sirah of the Prophet , and the Hadith to understand thoroughly.

What happens when you have little to no knowledge? Everyone has to base their beliefs and conclusions on something. Human beings cannot function without beliefs. Knowledge has the special characteristic of being impersonal.

Most Muslims in the West go to public school. There is no systematic study of Islam there. If they do go to Islamic schools, the quality of Islamic education is often poor as most Islamic schools don’t invest in qualified Islamic Studies programs or teachers. In many Muslim countries, despite their many issues, most Muslims have at least been studying Islam systematically for much of their lives.

Without that education, we end up with a vacuum of knowledge, but society, family, and culture dictate that we must make decisions about our religious beliefs and practices. The only recourse becomes emotion. Unfortunately what we call ‘being educated’ today is the education of the dunya, not the religion. But are you really ‘educated’ if you don’t understand your own ontological worldview?

Emotions are useful, but they cannot be trusted for our beliefs. Not only are emotions personal and thus biased on our subjective personal experiences, but trusting in them too many leads to psychological problems. Those who know this best are people are either psychotherapists or people who have suffered from mental illnesses like anxiety or depression and have learned to manage them. In anxiety, for example, your emotions of fear, self-criticism, and uncertainty take over your reason-based decision-making processes. You’re 28 years old, but overwhelming fear due to trauma from seeing your dad have a heart attack keeps convincing you that you are having a heart attack every time you feel a twitch in your chest. You get dozens of tests done to ensure you have no heart problems, but you read a page of Mayoclinic and all the fear comes back. True story by the way.

What we are seeing today in Muslim society in the West is people literally holding up their emotions as evidence for what they believe, say, and do. I have seen that many Muslim parents justify how they choose to bring up their kids without consulting a single fiqh book (e.g. that kids should be encouraged to pray at the age of 7, and reprimanded over it starting at the age of 10), or even any research-based parenting books. What tricks them into parenting the way they do is a well-intentioned but grossly uninformed love for their kids. They won’t enforce prayer on their kids early because ‘I’m being easy on them, look how tired they are and how much homework they have’, they won’t understand that they have to be a parent and not a friend, or let their kids make mistakes, because ‘unconditional love’. This ‘unconditional love’ is what will destroy their children’s Islam and their psychological well-being because of absent or helicopter parenting.

I have seen Muslims flinch or pull away at the emotional discomfort of being corrected or reprimanded with basic facts, even when done in a very polite, understanding, and respectful way. The problem is that in a vacuum of knowledge, and in a culture that celebrates the role of emotion over the intellect, this is a disaster. We end up confusing the impact of what people say to us with their intentions, thinking that they are ‘oppressing’ us, suppressing us, or being rude to us when in fact they’re just trying to correct us with facts. For most of human history, this would usually be a miscommunication, but now it’s a mantra.

The Imam or Shaykh speaking about women’s requirement to obey their husbands, or husbands’ responsibility to financially maintain their families is nowadays interpreted as an offensive, insidious or personal attack. The woman will call it misogynist, and the man will call it feminist. I once posted a reminder on my page about the importance of the 5 daily prayers, and it was absurd to see that some people were actually offended and started defending the fact that it was difficult to pray Fajr. Talk about how mortgages are haram and a grown man will start whining about how absurd it is to pay someone else’s rent. If you are offended by basic factual information, it is a serious problem. At the very least, accept the factual as factual. Social media exacerbates this, not only by not giving us the necessary undistracted time to reflect and hold ourselves accountable but also because it has created a culture in which we need to respond right away instead of putting down the phone for a few hours to think about what we just saw or read.

Don’t forget that it was Shaytan’s emotions of pride and arrogance that led to him to make his most regrettable decision of rebelling against the Creator and dooming himself to Hell.

Solutions:

1. We must seek Islamic knowledge. I don’t mean YouTube videos and Twitter posts. That is NOT knowledge. That is raw data. Structured knowledge is taken from teachers, well-designed courses, and programs. There are many such programs nowadays designed for the public. Many are online. The excuses for not learning due to access or unavailability are no longer admissible. Either study or acknowledge that you are choosing to remain ignorant and thus leave your emotions to be the judge of what you believe.
2. Islamic institutions and religious leadership MUST provide fardh-ayn programs, i.e. comprehensive Islamic education programs for the public that provide them the foundations of Islamic theology, fiqh, and spirituality that they need to function as Muslims on a daily basis. This has become fardh on these organizations and individuals themselves. Flowery talks with coffee served in the background are NOT a replacement for this. We need more educators and less speakers. Learn how to educate the public and not just preach to them.
3. Learn to manage your emotions. Override them with the knowledge of right and wrong in Islam. It’s easier said than done, but emotional intelligence is a concept that is extremely important for Muslims. Unfortunately today due to the political situation in the West this concept has almost been forgotten. As Muslims however we need to rise about this and learn from the emotional intelligence of the Prophet .

*To be contd. in Part 3…

[This article was first published here]

 

Related:

– A Real Crisis In The Trust Of Muslim Scholars And Leadership

– Why Studying And Teaching Aqidah is Necessary for the Ulama And Students of Knowledge

The post The Coddling Of The Western Muslim Mind: [Part II] The Islam Of Emotionalism appeared first on MuslimMatters.org.