Salaam
Yet another aunty grabbed my hand the other day and said that my bare wrists “don’t look good”. I pointed out that they weren’t bare- I was wearing a charm bracelet…
I know what she meant though. I’ve heard this lecture many times before. I wasn’t wearing any gold.
I don’t like gold and I have never done so. I dislike the look and the colour. And how silly would it look if I was wearing 12 chunky gold bracelets with English clothes?
And I hardly own any gold…. I have two gold rings which were a B’day present (from an English shop). Two teeny, weeny gold nose studs (not worth more then £5 each). And a gold bracelet that dad got me a year ago… and I don’t like wearing that cos it snags on peoples clothes.
If an Asian girl is not dripping in gold-is it really a big deal? Does it mean that her parents are financially struggling? Does it mean that her parents/husband doesn’t love her? Does it mean that she is not “feminine” enough? Does it mean that she’s going against her so called culture?
I can understand the following “our culture” argument to a certain extent…however, is there anything wrong with NOT following some aspects of our culture?
I do think that an Asian bride is not complete unless she is wearing gold…but isn’t it so pointless to buy so much gold for only one day? Can she not borrow a friends wedding gold for a day? I also really do not see the point of buying so much gold when a girl is born so that she can wear it on her wedding day….by the time her wedding day comes the gold is gone out of fashion anyway.
My distant cousin got married this summer. It was surprising and refreshing to see a bride not dripping with gold. She only had one chain around her neck and that tikka thing on her head-She looked SO beautiful.….her mum told us that she didn’t want any gold. And I know my cousin is doted on by her parents, uncles and grandparents…she’s the only girl in the family and is even nicknamed “princess” (and treated like one too)….and her parents are very, VERY well off.
And why specifically yellow chunky, heavy gold? What’s wrong with a girl wearing delicate white gold or [url=http://www.diamonds-ring.com/diamond/diamond-bracelet-DB20.htm]THIS[/url]?
The point of my thread isn’t to condemn those people who wear gold or even discourage people from wearing it. The issue raised is regarding the mentality that….a girl who isn’t dripping in gold is not loved by family….or that she’s not feminine enough or that she is going against her culture and becoming too “westernised”…. or that lack of gold reflects ones financial status. And this obsession with gold mainly shared by the older generation.
Please share you thoughts on all of the above…
Wasalaam
It doesnt hav to be gold ... arent normal bangles made of glass??? They just look nice i guess in a desi type of way. But its a matter of personal preference. I dont think it makes a difference, but as a girl they expect you to be into jewelery... i would hav prop assumed the same a couple of years ago... but its not the case, some do, some dont... personal preference again.
I always thought big GOLD bangles on girls indicated they must be married... not true tho. I think its such a BIG cultural thing back home that they're forgetting they're not in Pakiland anymore. I think its a case of them (elders) seeing bangles (jewelry) as a good thing culturally and they prob had them when they were kids and just want their kids to be into the same type of stuff. Which parent doesnt want their kids to take after them? Not many.
In terms of a brides gold... your getting the wrong end of the stick. Its NOT just for wearing on her wedding day, its also as a financial safe guard, if god forebid something should happen and she required to support her-self and since GOLD always had a decent '£' value then its an investment of sort.
Ofcourse this is totally optional.
Back in BLACK
i'm surprised u know that^... most people from our generation dont know of the above reason, did ur parents tell u it?
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
lol
yeah its due to many long conversation with mummy dearest.
Back in BLACK
same here - i heard of it from my dad.
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
[color=blue][b]No offence to anyone but i jus h8 gold :x ..YUK![/b][/color]
"Duniya toh badalti rehti hai...Ey mere Quaid tuh kabhi Na badal janaa"
?
Isnt it logical that investing money in gold is a financially very smart move?
I agre with Seraphim on this. Its abt personal preference. And my personal preference and opinion is that women who wear jewellery look better. Its just something that I personally think is right for women. They should be feminine and into jewellery, bangles, bracelets, earrings and all the rest of it. I think it extenuates her femininity (dunno if extenuates is correct in this context).
I think in Quran it is stated regarding women to the effect :
she who grew up in tha lap of adornment.
Or something similar. Basically its natural for women to be into jewellery but not men.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
Well ... im not really allowed to wear it so... thats never really been a problem for me.
Come to think of it... i dont really have any jewelry at all. Which is a good thing... coz im a guy... and we're butch... and jewelry is more of a girlie thing.
Back in BLACK
lol yeh.
Actually I borrow my older brothers ring when I get given a namaz, but other than that no adornment. Not even a watch.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
Thats quite true. But nowadays people are better off financially than say 30/40 years ago. Most of the women i know, exchange their wedding gold for the latest design. In doing so the jewellers take a portion of the gold every time they do so.
My sis-in-law bought earings for my neice, she had em changed cos they broke 3 times in one week. She bought em for £65 now they're only worth £15.
Daylight robbery :evil:
oh... well i have a watch ofcourse. But thats doesnt count as jewelry does it? Even if it was its NOT made of gold... or any other valuable material for that matter.
I was thinking of having a platinum chain made (nothing BIG and in your face... just something small) or maybe a ring. Just never got around to it.
Back in BLACK
[color=blue][b]Ur lucky then..innit!
I hav no gold at all which means so far im orite but i jus h8 wen i c Asians full arms of gold :x [/b][/color]
"Duniya toh badalti rehti hai...Ey mere Quaid tuh kabhi Na badal janaa"
I wouldnt knw im not a jeweler... but i would imagine he requires paying so...
Back in BLACK
I heard from my mate that his sister was told by her Teacher that when getting married its better for gold to be bought which is chunky and not too intricately designed because it keeps its value even when its design is out of fashion, whereas jewellery which itself is not worth much and is made more expensive due to the design and workmanship will be not worth much at all when fashions change.
Hence, thats a tip for the women out there:
Buy jewellery which is chunky rather than delicately designed if you going for financial security.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
[color=blue][b]Im nt really sure about this but i heard that Islam forbids the men of wearing gold :? ..theres a reason behind it but at the mo i jus cant remember it.[/b][/color]
"Duniya toh badalti rehti hai...Ey mere Quaid tuh kabhi Na badal janaa"
It does forbid men from wearing gold (which is why i dont own a single piece of gold). I think there was something about gold being like fire for men. So if we wore gold chains... it would be like wearing rings of fire around our necks on the day of judgement or in hell or something or other.
Back in BLACK
[color=darkblue][b]Jazak'Allah khair bro![/b][/color]
"Duniya toh badalti rehti hai...Ey mere Quaid tuh kabhi Na badal janaa"
Salaam
I didn’t know that either.
I would have though cash would be more suitable then gold…..doesn’t gold lose its value anyway if one tries to re-sell it?
And the issue raised is NOT regarding women adorning themselves…..most girls love to adorn themselves and wear Jewellery.
I was only specifically referring to yellow gold.
Wasalaam
You can get white gold aswell.
Probably looks fake.
Gold will always keep its value, as long as it is pure enough.
To renew gold, all you do is wash it in alcohol. Not drinking sort, but you can pick up industrial one down B&Q ir something.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
[color=darkblue][b]You can get one 4rm ARGOS too, nt that i hav one but i alwayz see em advertised weneva i visit[/b][/color].
"Duniya toh badalti rehti hai...Ey mere Quaid tuh kabhi Na badal janaa"
Obviously they charge an amount for their service, but also take a small portion of the gold.
[size=8]I didn't imply you were to know about it[/size]
I LURVE bling bling
but not big, ugly, chunky, yellow gold-
I'm a fan of white gold though-even though its waaaay to expensive
I like delicate stuff-I hate chunky stuff
Mr Admin if u try to re sell ur gold u'll lose money-thats a fact
depends who to, and what condition.
The goldsmiths 'charge' to 'clean' the items, lowering the final price they pay out.
And then they sell it on at full price.
You will always get back less than what you paid. That is how business works.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
u lose a LOT
I think bangles brought at £500 would be re sold at £400-thats a BIG loss
so thats why I dont understand why gold instead of cash would be considered financial security
You can wear gold.
And think exchange rates
At one point A pound was 20 rupees. At another 50 rupees. now its around 100 odd.
At the same time the british currency has also ducked and dived at times.
Gold holds its value. If a currency goes down, the price of gold in the currency will rise to counter the effect.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
well another reason why I think gold is silly for financial security is cos of fashion reasons
obvioulsy fashion is ever changing-I was watching mums wedding home video the other day and even though she looked good-I'd NEVER wear her wedding gold cos its 22 odd years out of fashion
and if she sold her wedding gold she'd lose LOTS of money-like u said exchange rates
i dont like ALOT of gold...
my mums the type that wants us girls to wear gold ALL the time...cant stand it...looks T.P
i like to be simple...not loaded with gold heavy bangles or rings they just tend to come in the way.
someone mentioned its best to get chunky gold...i agree it has more value is slightly more expensive and doesnt easily get damaged like 22 carat...
not much of a good investment, you lose out big time if you try selling it
but good for emergancys
Well said girl
I agree
FYO TPs are nice.
I love that whiff of salan that you get from TPs and when they talk loud MP in the middle of road so people sitting in their houses can hear whose daughter in the village has just got into the house that was up for sale two streets away.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
no you joking....i dont like T.PS, reminds me of ladies back home that does.
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