I haven't been on here much because I been feeling really down.
I just made this blog as a way of talking about it.
I know what many of you would say about 'LOVE out of marriage' and 'LOVE MARRIAGES' but in my case I think I was a little late as I fell in love with someone before marriage a long while ago and we broke up because her parents don't want her to marry somebody who is not of their language, Me. We broke up but I still love her and wish to marry her still.
Her parents did not put anything religious into the matter but how she should marry somebody who is the same language as they are. the funny thing is her parents have soo much in difference on cultures and she's mix raced.
I really hate this feeling but it gets harder every day.
I did miss my Revy Family though
Comments
The world can be a cruel place.
Often things don't work out the way you intended.
Only think you can do is move on I guess. I assume it wont be easy but time heals all - just dont become too preoccupied with what might have been.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Sorry your feeling down in the dumps dude. Though its natural I guess for u to feel down, its also a time for you to be patient. Allah says:
“And it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know.” (AI-Baqarah, 2:216)
Also I think Umar (ra) put it nicely when he said "Go easy on yourself, for the outcome of all affairs is determined by God’s decree.If something is meant to go elsewhere, it will never come your way, but if it is yours by destiny, from you it cannot flee "
You might not even have posted this blog for people to tell u not to worry etc , since you said you just wanted to talk about it, but I hope you still find some comfort in it inshaaAllah
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
REVVY POWER! STAY STRONG!
repent to Allah, then pray istikharah and go with your gut feeling guided by Allah, to go after her or not.
and if you should go after her. then its time to sweeten the parents!! perseverance! and aptience!
and if your gut feeling after istikhaarah as to give up. then leave it. make yourself busy so you wont have time to think abt it. and inshaaAllah one day, you'll wake up and she wont be hte first thng you think abt.
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Time heals most things, people move on
The problem with could have beens is that they are measured in potential (and even then, that of the best of potential times) as opposed to reality and because of that they are often over inflated.
Even then, people can't hold onto the past and past potential forever.
Things could "work", but I doubt they really want to consider that, from what the decisions are that they seem to have already taken. There would also be big issues if things go wrong - no support structure or anything.
There would then also be the question of what message he could deliver to any kids he has... "Do as I say, not as I do" wont be apprciated by them 15/20 years down the line.
@ mushy - if it cant work, give yourself time and let it do its magic. When you are ready move on, you will.
It wont be easy to move on, because (metaphorically) horses are easier to control when they are in the stable than once they have bolted straight out, but it is possible.
@ Lilly's post - jut to clarify but istikhara does not overrule shariah.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
@ bilan's post:
I like that quote.
(and I also like the new look of quotes, even if I must say so myself.)
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
Just because you can do something doesnt mean that you should. Selfishness does not mean happiness as you can only see the short term and are compromised by emotion. In the long term it can be a bad thing.
Even if that is not the case in this situation, not all good things work out
Someone I know of, their firstborn was in intensive care and then life support after contracting a bug for a few months and the parents still didnt show up, were not present for the funeral or anything.
So no, not all parents give up.
I assume that both sets of parents have been addressed and they are still not having any of it.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
@patience: im 20 almost 21 this month and its funny how you tell me to grow a pair because my idea to get married to someone wouldnt be there if i wasnt willing to speak to her parents. ive tried to be smart about it i aint a rude person unless im forced to be.
@everyone: thankyou everyone you know honestly i thought i was gonna get everyone screwing at me lol but i didnt...well not much. but yeah maybe in time i will get better.
sorry i didnt reply for a long time even though i been on revi a while i still get confused when i get on it so i couldnt find my blog lol
The Wisest of Man Is Not The One Who Knows, But The One Who Seeks Knowledge In Order To Perform
if you can get me some chocolate that would be great.