I tried this topic previously under the guise of the beards (and the veil) topic, but that went elsewhere.
The question I was trying to get at is how far should others go to try to get you to be (what they consider) a better Muslim?
Does anyone apart from parents, spouse, siblings have any right to tell you to do anything?
Even them, should hey be limited in how far they can go? (we all know that constant nagging can be a negative influence and get people to go the other way.)
So, what gives?
Assalamu alaikum,
Dawah is an obligatory duty on every muslim, so you can't abandon it, and it shouldn't just be within the realm of our own famiies. Muslims are supposed to be brothers and sisters to one another aren't they. I can't just profess to love them with my tongue and do nothing actively. Shouldn't I love for them what I love for myself i.e jannah But I should first learn the manner and art of dawah, and know the subject I am trying to teach the person before embarking on the task. If I don't know the manners of dawah I will do a better job at confusing and insulting muslims or turning away potential muslims.
I don't think you should nag. You should kindly give your advice then surely you have done your bit?. Then on the day of judgment that person can't stand in front of Allah and you and say "Ibrahim didn't tell me dating was haram even though he is a close friend, and practicing muslim." Apparently on the day of judgment some ppl (lets pray it's not us) will be so desperate to take the good deeds of others they will pull every trick in the book to secure their hereafter. So we better do everything we can to secure ours today.
I'm hearing some lectures at the moment by Muhammad Al Shareef, a series called fiqh ad-dawah. Very useful, the Shk said if you can use dawah techniques to bring someone into the fold of Islam you have hit the jackpot as far as the hereafter is concerned. So how bad do you wanna hit that jackpot?
“O my people! Truly, this life of the world is nothing but a (quick passing) enjoyment, and verily, the hereafter that is the home that will remain forever.” [Ghafir : 39]
Paraphrased from an episode of House:
"What would a person who acts like a 30 year old at 16 act like at 30?"
"Like a 16 year old."
So while it is possible to discipline yourself, control yourself I do not think it is a good thing.
If you allow yourself to live and fail, at least you know that you have yourself to blame.
If on the other hand you decide to live for others/hold yourself in check and things go wrong (which they do. always)...
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
The people of wisdon will not have a guage or a rule book for this. They will see the person and understand what will be effective for that person. Allah SWT revealed in the Qur'an that it was not sent to be a burden and this is a principle that thewise apply.
It was said about Shaykh ul Akbar ibn Arabi RA that though he was the greatest teacher, he never taught. Instead he would walk with the people who came to him or be with them for a while and through his words and company they would be taught without realising it was happening!
The nasiha for the less righteous person is not the same for the more righteous person though they can both improve. The best inspiriation to change a person you can give is to do good to them. If you can give them inner peace they will incline towards you and your way.
Gentleness and kindness were never a part of anything except that it made it beautiful, and harshness was never a part of anything except that it made it ugly.
Through cheating, stealing, and lying, one may get required results but finally one becomes
Whats the nasiha? :S
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
nasiha means advice
oh right, thanks
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
Maybe as much as until the person gets fed up of you.
Does friends go on that list too?
They have no binding authority over you, and if you like (and you can find them) you can change your friends to others that are closer to how you want them to treat you.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
The best primary form of Dawa is to be a decent person and Muslim in front of others with that you can't go too wrong. Start with that and people will see that you're a safe person to hang around with.
“Before death takes away what you are given, give away whatever there is to give.”
Mawlana Jalal ud Din Rumi