Salaam
I hate public speaking with a passion. I’ve often had nightmares of me messing up in front of an audience.
However, despite my extreme hatred for it. I’m regularly in front of an audience. I’m OK with teachings and being in front of an audience of children…it’s any other type of audience that scares me.
And for some reason, public speaking does not get easier with practise. Public speaking is not something that I can get out of either…the night before a speech I can not sleep, eat, of think about anything else, I have nightmares all night long and feel nauseous in the morning….I don’t know why I put myself through that.
I make mistakes too when I’m nervous…sometimes I freeze for a few seconds in the beginning when I see hundreds of eyes looking at me… and sometimes I talk too fast.
Since I’m interested in teaching and am often asked to deliver a speech, I need to relax and improve….I regret not taking the public speaking course that was offered in college and regret not participating in the debate team, I naively assumed that I would never need these skills in the future.
I’m OK with speech writing since I love writing and only speak about things that I feel passionately about…
It’s my approach that I need to sort out….who should I look at? (Sometimes I deliver my speech to the clock on the wall or one friend of mine who may be sitting in the audience)….What should I do with my hands? How should I stand when I do not have a pulpit in front of me? And how on Earth can I relax?
What makes a good speaker?
Any tips, experiences or thoughts to share?
Wasalaam
I am the worse person to be giving advice!
However at uni I had a speech this year and it went well as i wasnt too nervous whilst doin speech. Also i have started takin part in debates - speakin up more, i think i have become more confident. I will be leading a debate next week which will be in favour of masculinity :? ( i can think of many reasons against it lol!)
I think if one can fake confidence then they are lucky, my sis gets a wee tiny bit nervous but when she's on stage she's on a roll. I think it also helps if you do your speech well in advance and rehearse it over with family/friends and know your subject well. Its best to not look too much at your speech which is written up, just glance at it as a pointer.
My sis said i have to do somethin for the Mawlid-un-Nabi conference this time :evil: she knows how much i hate speakin in public but i guess she just wants me to get used to it...
Confidence from practice and knowing your audience are really the two most important things.
One of the worst speaking experiences i've had was when I was giving a speech outside and my reader lost power for about five minutes. I had to go extemp for those five minutes and when it came back on it was reset to the beginning of the speech so I had to continue extemp until the end of the speech. It actually turned out to be a bit of a blessing because I was able to better mold my speech to my audience rather than adhere rigidly to one which was beginning to lose their interest.
There it was absolutely crucial that I had practiced and practiced until I had such a grasp of the speech, material and tools available to me that even when a curve ball came I was ready.
I think nervious-ness in public speaking extends from caring too much or worrying about marks etc.
Just try NOT to care/worry about it and you wont be nervious. Relax... and b cool
Ofcourse its easy for me to say that.... im not the one who has to do a presentation... just focus on your goal and let your worries melt away.
Back in BLACK
Salam
Seraph. You are right. Her problem is that she
wants to be perfect. Hence, she is truly scared of criticism.
Thats basically it.
Criticism of her appearance, her work, her method, her looks,
her efforts, her potential, her approach, and her talent.
Omrow
off topic :roll:
Its all about caring.
I can speak in public. I can portray my voice. But that is because I do notcare what people think about me.
The thing I find hardest is group discussions. I always seem to get drowned out... so I just speak to one person who normally repeats what I say... has happened ever since school.
So Muslim Sister forget about the people. Afterall you have the guts to get out front. think the sentence before saying it. not only does that stop you from be incomprehensible, but the short pauses make you look rather intelligent.
And know the points you wanna make. I count. I want to say three things. or 5 things. I rarely say them all, but it helps keep tally, especially if you do not have something written down.
Saying that, do not write anything down unless essential. bullet points. Short. Sharp. Sweet.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
thats a good one. the last presentation i did, i prepared for in detail, and that was a massive mistake. my first ever presentation which i spoke to you guys about for help, that went way better because i hadnt had time to make notes and whatever, so everything was off the top of my head, i had no notes to confuddle me, it went way better...
[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/Dust.html]Dust, X-Men[/url]
Salaam
Yeh, I do stress perfection to myself. I’ve always thought that if you want to do something you should so it properly and wholeheartedly or not do it at all.
It’s not so much people’s opinion of me that stresses me out…most of the time I do not even personally know the people in the audience, so their opinion means little to me….and its not as if I’m trying to impress them or trying to get in their good books.
It’s more so, the stress of making sure that I deliver my message coherently (not waffling) and not being responsible of delivering incorrect information and making people go astray….I also fear being hypocritical in my actions, so if I’m going on and on about good manners/rights of people or whatever I have to make sure that I myself practise or at least am actively striving to implement whatever I’m preaching to others….I also need to regularly keep in sincerity in check….and I hate being in spotlight, I don’t like all eyes on me, it makes me nervous…and when I’m nervous I make mistakes.
Yesterday, I had to speak in Hounslow Mosque…the speech in itself went well. It’s everything that goes with it which stressed me out. I couldn’t sleep the night before, I left without eating breakfast cos I felt sick, the two hours journey there coupled with nerves/hunger/ and fatigue gave me a killer headache…and after I gave my speech I just felt immense relief and exhaustion.
Bullet points are a great idea, it’s always better to speak in your own words then read of a sheet….I never read from my written speech but the only reason why I type every word up is cos I fear my mind going blank and fear getting distracted and losing my trail of thought….I seriously need to chill.
If I get on to my teachers training course, I hope they’ll teach me the art of public speaking.
Wasalaam
Uni makes u do BEAR presentations-on boring topics :roll:
my lecturers patronise and embarass u in front of EVERYONE
on a side note though-most people's presenations in Uni are pretty crap
Our lects never do that, i only had it once where i didnt prepare for seminar and she asked me a question I bluffed through it - it was right but wasnt lucky second time as i said to her the paper was "rubbish" (i hadnt even read it!) she wasnt too happy that i didnt like it (duno if she wrote that paper hmmm)
lol wow, you've got mean professors...
my lecturers are CRAZY
if anyone gets in the lecture hall FIVE minutes late-he calls security and has them kicked out
no joke
and in the MIDDLE of ppls presentations he stops and patronises people
and I have such bad luck that I'm always stuck with a bunch of losers when it comes to group presenations :roll:
Im happier speaking on my own-its other people who let me down
Same here, there is nothing worse than being in a presentation group with skivers, we had one last time and this guy pulled out just a day before sayin "sorry cant do it spoke to lecturer, best of luck" cheeky git but i gave him a piece of my mind - that was fun he kept apologisin, too right!
Guys I need some info….basically, I’ve been asked to speak about mothers on a Mother’s Day Programme.
Towards the end of my speech….I want to make this point that it’s the mothers of Awliya’s (friends of Allah) who make many Wali’s who and what they are..
I’ll quote the example of Baba Fareed and what his mother used to do to make him prayer…and also the children of Hadrat Fatima (ra).
And it’s totally slipped my mind atm ….but apparently Shaikh Abdul Qadir Jillani (ra) (or maybe another Awliya) was born with half or part of the Qur’an memorised, because of his mother attachment to the Qur’an during her pregnancy…
If anyone knows full details, please post them up…and also let me know if you can think of any other great mothers who played a significant role in the tarbiat of her children who later went on to become Saints/scholars etc
some great muslim mothers iknow of from the top of my head are
Maryam (pbuh)-mother of jesus (pbuh)
Asiayah(pbua)-wife of the paraoh who took care of moses(pbuh) as a baby
prophets (pbuh) wives and daughter
Public speaking is all about nerves if you can control your nerves you will be ok
heres some tips i learned that helped
recite the speech over and over again
when you start the speech take a deep breath and relax dont dive straight into it and stumble
focus on the words your saying and not on the people watching
speak clearly so everyone can hear you and dont shout or read fast
also i notice people when giving speeches moves their legs and hands around strangly , or rock back and forth often they dont realise their doing this because its out of nerves-to prevent this i usaully hold my hands toghether or put them in my pockets and try to be relaxed so this doesnt occur.
personally i love presentations and speeches as it gives me a chance to express my opinion and views and everyone has to listen or it could be that i enjoy being center of attention and hearing my own voice ?
heres a intro that may help with your speech sis, im good at intros and conclusions but get lost in the middle
Despite the stereotypes, Muslim women have always played a vital role in the Muslim community, and not only in traditional roles. Early Muslim women served the community through scholarship, teaching, nursing, and other important activities. Among them......
im gonna be controversial again
But isnt mothers day haram and agaisnt islam, its not an islamic custom , its not in the quran or hadiths , but rather a western commercial holiday e.g. valentines day and halloween ?
:roll:
whats everyone getting mummy for mother's day?
i was thinking of clintons flowers and thortons chocs delivered to our door
and some jewlery
I dont know yet :?
Maybe get a perfume that mum has mentioned b4 but i cant rember what its called hmm or maybe some loose fabric or even a shawl. Mum aint fan of choco's and since i am on a diet i cant eat them for her lol. Flowers i'll get from my local florist. Proly get the perfume this thurs. after uni.
Any other ideas apart from flowers, chocs, jewlery, perfume, fabric or shawl?
:?
i hate giving speeches....
smile and be happy!!!