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yes, my question is confusing...so forget it, at least until i can word it better...
@lilly, well correct me if im wrong but i would say its more the guy tht does the snapping up than the girl...i cant imagine myself approaching a potential husband...tht sounds excruciating...
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
+1 Maybe times might change by the time I'm ready for marriage but right now it just looks desperate, I think.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
yup to feefs!
theres a wise head on those shoulders
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
lol
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
i did not knw tht! just googled it, so i learned something new today
thnx for tht 
so maybe i should say suin like dnt listen to feefs, she doesnt knw what shes talking about! try harder next time!!
and cyber people so do count!! maybe even more so than non-cyber people
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
For everyone else's benefit I mentioned "He who praises you murders you." which is a saying of Sayyiduna Ali (RA)
Or you could stay silent!
lol how did you come to that conclusion?
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
or that! haha
and that is of course the only natural conclusion to come to!
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
let me just reiterate, we ARE talking about the POWER of Silence. (Y)
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
the power of WHAT NOW?????!
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVZP9pzGKP8 ;):P
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
i kinda find tht voice off putting ...so doesnt suit what theyre tryna sell!
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
Their concept is pretty good though I think - The question thing - more likely they will be honest about the answers. (I'm quite cynical about this sort of stuff lol)
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
i dnt blame u! plenty of weirdos out their and not the good weird we were talking about yesterday ;)lol
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
Lol you sound like me when I was still young and not married! Financial stability, finish education, get a good job , a house...all this materialistic stuff we forget that the most important thing is trusting Allah swt.
I had exactly the same views as you , except I knew who I wanted to marry. But my so called 'plans' didn't go to plan, Allah had something else in store for me. Instead I got married at 18, first year at university, working part time , no house and no money. I'm now working full time, with a house, just finished my degree Allhumdulilah. Everything happens for a reason and there is always widsom behind it. Whilst you search for your wife or the right woman to marry you can get ready financially or get your education done, but don't let that be your reason for NOT marrying when you have found that particular person.
Whether you are 16 or 21 guy or girl, if you know who you want to marry and be with them or life then go for it. If you don't have anyone in mind and want to get married, go for it. There is no restriction in Islam, in fact Islam promotes to get married early, the sooner the better. Not just to save yourself from sin, but to have the love and emotions you get in a marriage, to know that you have someone looking out for you for life, to share good times and happy times with, to share you Deen and knowledge with.
You need a sit down with your parents, and explain your feelings to them so they understand you and your situation.
Your own soul is nourished when you are kind; it is destroyed when you are cruel.
was talking to two friends (from the same ethnic background, they were) and talking about hehe, in-laws (what else? eh?)
nyways, how did the convo start? cant remember..ohh yay! 6 years in uni for medicine, and hubby who wont let you study?
"WHAT?!" i say. we're not getting married to OLD MEN, we're getting married to guys from same generation with same views/expectations etc..
friend: what if he's traditional etc?
me: euh.. YOU DONT MARRY HIM?!?!?!?!?! HELLO?!
friend: oh yeah...
_____
then it came to the *beloved* mother in law! and i just couldnt get my head round the fact that the girl has to look after his mum. i was like, euh..and MY MUM? and she's like, well you gotta look after his mum too..
me: WHY?!?
friend: well him and you look after HIS mum. and YOUR bro will have to look after your mum (and HIS wife)
me: WHAT?! why cant people just look after their own family, i look after my mum, he looks after his mum.
friends: just dont marry a Bengali eh?
then the whole, moving in with THEM. why should I, the girl, have to move in a house full of STRANGERS, on HIS ground. nOT FAIR!.
moving out, into NEW territory for BOTH of us. THERE! and an EQUAL distance from BOTH parents houses. but that shouldnt be a factor, more, in an area convenient for both of us. or just where we can find a place.
and if there isnt place. then HE can move in. HMPF!
Disclaimer: !!!! im not saying im not gona look after his mum, after all she'll be my lil mummy in law and all, i just dont like being forced. or told to. and my mum should come first shouldnt she? (yes my lovely lovely lovely mummyyyyyyyy) and anyway, how much looking after would she needs?)
____
FURTHERMORE
these questions:
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
I guess it's an asian thing. Dunno what topic it was, but I'm sure I've mentioned how my mum says once you get married your mother-in-law IS you mum (too) and so you have to treat her like that.
It's traditional for the guy to stay with his family and it'd be weird for the guy to move in with his in-laws unless he's from abroad or something. But nowadays, I think more and more guys are moving out their parents homes and living alone. Although I personally only know of one couple who live alone, without any of their children and I think its really sad tbh.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
What you laughing at, man?!
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
ok, nothing I said then
When you start to always think about it and so everything in your brain equals to marriage
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
calm down! no one can replace your mum, d.w lol
i dunno, lilly seemed shocked by it.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
yep, that what my friend said (the bold bit). i remember it coz we were entering this shop to buy SWEETS!
I can't think of anyone I know from the top of my head who are married and live with parents. yep yep, most if not all live together in their own flat (cute flats too, so tiny and cute!) but not far from the guy's parents' house, and they come over real often. but they're more the first kids then the last. so the house isnt empty.. yet...
then i'm safe! phew...
i mean, when will MATHS ever = marriage?! or chemistry!!
on a more serious note, that happens to everygirls. i think its the length of one of those "episode" that we should consider here. but there's still just the passing "marriage-craze" everyone experiences. just coz they can.
in conclusion: this method of collecting data is very unreliable.
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
never mind tht the person collecting the data is completely fruitella!!!! (a reference to ur love of sweets, just to add tht special little touch)
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
completely fruitella eh? ROFL!!
havent had fruitella is a veeerryyy long time....
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
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