Muslims Dating

Seraphim —

Sup,

"A man and women are not alone, except that Shaytaan is the third in their company"

The above is mentioned in the Quran. So WHY i ask you do muslims date?

Why do muslim brother and sisters take part in dating? When its clearly said to be haraam?

Some where along the line the generations view had suddenly changed and what was once forbidden in Islam is slowly becoming more acceptable?? Why?

What was there some sort of devine intervention or something that i missed?

You'll get answers like:

"We were young... its in the past... it happens?"

or

"She had Jam on her lips and i was hungry"

Oh Comeon people!!! You cant bend these rules, it aint open to interpretation the Quran is clear as crystal on the subject: Dating is NOT allowed. Yet they do it anyway, knowing fully that it aint acceptable.

Another thing i've noticed with the new generations is they'll use technology to aid them with this kinda thing since every1's got a mobile (some with more than one mobile) so you ring each other on the mobiles (so parents dont find out), they text, fall in love over the internet, they'll meet in stupid places like Starbucks... b4 you know it is all hugs and kisses.. and then... oh your gonna like this... they say... 'yeah we muslims'!!! Now tell me which part of what they're doing is Islamic?

Look at our parents... i doubt the majority of them knew or even met each other before they got married. Yet with the new generation searching for Mr/Mrs Right is in the majority while arranged marriages are now declining.

And thats NOT the worst part... no no no ... the worst part is: if this is the kind of things the new generation is doing... what will the generations after that do? Which other sins will they start making acceptable?

Discuss your views: Cause? Reasons why?(if any)

Forum

Amzy — Sat, 9 Sep 2006 - 14:29

Hey kids!

Not eaning to sound snotty or rude or anything but i was reading he first statement but as i go further down the topic seems to have totally changed so forgive me but im gonna make a comment on the original statement made.

We all know that "dating" is not permitted in Islam, but nothing is ever that simple. Listening to Music is not permitted either but im sure alot of us who have replied to this thread listens to music, so why is one thing slandered more then the other??? I am not saying its ok to date but what i am saying is we all know we do things that are against the teachings of Islam but do not be so quick to judge and point the finger when we all have faults in ourselves.

Im sure most people who date are fully aware of what is right and wrong and they have made the choice to make that decision knowing the consequences for when they are answering to Allah...

Dave — Sat, 9 Sep 2006 - 18:17

[quote="Seraphim"]. So WHY i ask you do muslims date?

Why do muslim brother and sisters take part in dating? When its clearly said to be haraam?[/quote]

I bet you 500 new friends and some Axe body spray (seriously does anybody use that stuff?) it is all about peer pressure and hormones.

Eh... thats pessimistic, i couldnt keep my hands off my wife even before dating was considered "cool"

But i was raised differently... well technically i wasnt raised at all, but you get the picture - i think most muslims do a fabulous job of raising their children to be practicing muslims, they know the difference between right and wrong, they actually prefer or want to do the right thing, but that added twinge of peer pressure mixed with pheramones just destroys their judgement.

I think that is where parents need to take over, if their kids are dating or doing something unislamic parents should recognize 1. Their kid probably is confused and can't help it. 2. This is normal, kids dont know what they are doing 3. As unfortunate as one or two are, they still need to be corrected, whether that be via tricking poking, proding, inconveniencing, and maybe even belting into doing the right thing.

Parents dont have to be "nice" or "fair" they just have to be right and they have to enforce that.

Seraphim — Sat, 9 Sep 2006 - 22:21

[quote="Odysseus"][quote="Seraphim"]. So WHY i ask you do muslims date?

Why do muslim brother and sisters take part in dating? When its clearly said to be haraam?[/quote]

Parents dont have to be "nice" or "fair" they just have to be right and they have to enforce that.[/quote]

I couldnt have put it better myself. 8)

MuslimSister — Mon, 11 Sep 2006 - 14:54

[quote="Amzy"]Hey kids!

Not eaning to sound snotty or rude or anything but i was reading he first statement but as i go further down the topic seems to have totally changed so forgive me but im gonna make a comment on the original statement made.

We all know that "dating" is not permitted in Islam, but nothing is ever that simple. Listening to Music is not permitted either but im sure alot of us who have replied to this thread listens to music, so why is one thing slandered more then the other??? I am not saying its ok to date but what i am saying is we all know we do things that are against the teachings of Islam but do not be so quick to judge and point the finger when we all have faults in ourselves.

Im sure most people who date are fully aware of what is right and wrong and they have made the choice to make that decision knowing the consequences for when they are answering to Allah...[/quote]

You raised an intresting point.

I suppose this comes under the "major/minor" sins category....premarital/extra marital relationships are major sins in Islam

That’s why people would make a bigger deal out of listening to music than having an affair.

But you are right though…namely that many of us are quick to condemn and point the finger when we have 101 things wrong with ourselves….

The point you raised is also seen by those who strongly hate those who partake in homosexual acts, but think it isn’t a big deal to sleep around with married women….even though both acts in Islam are punishable by death….yet people, “hate” gays more than those who have affairs.

Dave — Tue, 12 Sep 2006 - 00:41

I was reflecting today about how awesome I'm going to be as a parent (I mean seriously who [i]wouldn't[/i] want me as a dad), whilst eating my traditional lunch feast of ham and cheese.

And I thought! Dave ol-Boy it's hypocritical for you to say "I'll never let them date" since technically speaking its not against your religion and you did date their mother for a significant amount of time.

So I thought, well in the interest of fairness I'm going to let my daughters date when the time comes (that would be 31 for those audience members who were interested) on one AND ONLY ONE condition.

That it be done, over my dead body.

Seraphim — Tue, 12 Sep 2006 - 12:20

[quote="Odysseus"]I was reflecting today about how awesome I'm going to be as a parent (I mean seriously who [i]wouldn't[/i] want me as a dad), whilst eating my traditional lunch feast of ham and cheese.

And I thought! Dave ol-Boy it's hypocritical for you to say "I'll never let them date" since technically speaking its not against your religion and you did date their mother for a significant amount of time.

So I thought, well in the interest of fairness I'm going to let my daughters date when the time comes (that would be 31 for those audience members who were interested) on one AND ONLY ONE condition.

That it be done, over my dead body.[/quote]

lol you're right .... thats far less hypocritical.