Ah, so you're talking about a liar? Is that what this is?

its just part of fashion

after going out with someone for god knows how long (minutes in some cases)

everyone thinks the next logical step iz to tell em u love em

"100" wrote:

Ah, so you're talking about a liar? Is that what this is?

im not talking about anyone specific

im talking hypothetically

it just doesn't exist

people are so caught up in the whole 'love notion'

explain to me

define love between man n woman

Well, that isn't love. A person might be that full of love for everyone, but in that case they wouldn't tell a girl they love her in such a short time. Having said which, there is also naive romance, and it may not be lies as such. On these grounds you tell people love doesn't exist. Humbug.

I have explained that, surf back a page and tell me your thoughts.

you can feel 'affection' or 'like' someone, but the whole

Months of going out:

person A: 'i love you'

Person B: 'i love you too'

Person A: 'cant live without you'

blah blah blah....ewww n gross...makes me wana chuck

Salma, that is really filthy. You will not find life with your husband very satisfying if you get that scarred over some childish misappropriation of love. Did a friend or sibling ever tell you they hate you? They almost certainly didn't mean it. But hatred is real also, as real as a commitment.

"100" wrote:

You know if you're in love because you'll be prepared to commit to being with, caring about and respecting that person for as long as you both live to the exclusion of other whims and desires. Once you make that commitment it becomes a two-way deal and it is wise to shore it up with compassion, fun, generosity and impeccable behaviour. People who claim to be incapable of love should live alone in the mountains.

live in the mounatains??? mite try that

this sounds like love between family members

'commit to being with': you don't leave ur family ever

'caring and respecting that person': you care about n respect your family

'a two-way deal and it is wise to shore it up with compassion, fun, generosity and impeccable behaviour': loving your family is a two way deal

There is no difference. And your parents? Do they show love for one another? How far would they go to save each other from a bad situation? Is that normal? Seek, and ye shall find.

"100" wrote:

Salma, that is really filthy. You will not find life with your husband very satisfying if you get that scarred over some childish misappropriation of love. Did a friend or sibling ever tell you they hate you? They almost certainly didn't mean it. But hatred is real also, as real as a commitment.

truth hurts??

how is it childish?

u hear this bull everyday

whilst in tc, today, ill take a note of how many people actually say that to each other (childish misappropiation of love), i very much doubt it, these people range from all ages, childish i very much doubt it

I think you should try the mountains for a while, see what life's like without people. Oldham's pretty hilly. Or hook up with Naz and work it out for yourselves. Your experience is one of false promises. Happens. Childish is getting hung up on it. I can tell you, I am surrounded by love. There are times when I can see most clearly, it is all that keeps me going. I would be homeless or in a nuthouse, I sometimes think.

My aunt is caring for my uncle who has dementia. I can tell you that's very, very testing. There are few moments of real joy in it. She has to recommit to loving him every day. She does that because she once said she loved him and doesn't like to break a promise.

"100" wrote:

I think you should try the mountains for a while, see what life's like without people. Oldham's pretty hilly. Or hook up with Naz and work it out for yourselves. Your experience is one of false promises. Happens. Childish is getting hung up on it. I can tell you, I am surrounded by love. There are times when I can see most clearly, it is all that keeps me going. I would be homeless or in a nuthouse, I sometimes think.

My aunt is caring for my uncle who has dementia. I can tell you that's very, very testing. There are few moments of real joy in it. She has to recommit to loving him every day. She does that because she once said she loved him and doesn't like to break a promise.

why you involving me, its between u an salma. If you read my post a bit closer i didnt say love doesnt exist of course it does (paerents loving there children, brothers and sisters etc) but i can understand where Salma is coming from. Just coz u is all loved up doesnt mean everybody has to be like you, people are entitled to have their own opinion about love. Deal wiv it.

"Naz" wrote:

why you involving me, its between u an salma. If you read my post a bit closer i didnt say love doesnt exist of course it does (paerents loving there children, brothers and sisters etc) but i can understand where Salma is coming from. Just coz u is all loved up doesnt mean everybody has to be like you, people are entitled to have their own opinion about love. Deal wiv it.

Altho thats true.

What im more interested in is why?

Why do you (Salma), not believe in it? Im just curious?

Bcoz you see in my experience believing in love is believing in hope for a brighter future. Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you hoped for.

So i suppose my next question is, why do you not have hope for a brighter future?

i do believe in love to a certain extent

like i said i love ma family (not sure bout ma relatives ) but i really cant get my head around the whole, 'falling in love thing'

with family, love is a natural thing, it's just there, can't explain it well, but u get the general idea

but things like: meeting a stranger n falling in love, not very realistic

on a final note:

'why do you not have hope for a brighter future?'

i do have hope for a brighter future

i see my 3/4 bedroom house (somewhere in Oldham/Birmingham), my beautiful cars parked in the driveway,a fabulois job which makes a difference in the world, my 2 kids (Ashanti and Irfan) and possibly a hubby

now if that isn't hope for a bright future then i dont no what is

Easy Naz, got your PM but again ftr, I do apologise for my error. I should make sure I've read posts properly before I go calling people names like that. Thanks for not minding.

Salma, sounds pretty cool. I do believe in, and have experienced, the butterflies thing, although if you don't call that love it isn't. But there's a bit of a difference between how you just put it and what you said initially. Good. Love is good.

the buterflies thing :shock:

surely u can't be serious???

"Salma" wrote:

the buterflies thing :shock:

surely u can't be serious???

As serious as a clown fighting in the vietnam war.

That isn't what I'm describing as love, but yes. When humans get attracted to each other it can have effects on the body. I reccomned you use PM if you would like to know about that.

Have you never fancied someone? What was that, an economic principle?

"100" wrote:

That isn't what I'm describing as love, but yes. When humans get attracted to each other it can have effects on the body. I reccomned you use PM if you would like to know about that.

Have you never fancied someone? What was that, an economic principle?

i think ur talking about one of the seven deadly sins there: LUST :shock:

:oops: I was just talking butterflies but everybody has their thing, I'm not judging you.

Seriously Salma, whatever happened in your marriage is what happened, it doesn't mean you can't have love. Sounds like you're cool enough to start moving on from all that.

I don't think anyone is against the concept of Love. It just people don't believe in the biggest fairy tale of them all. [b]You find someone you fall in Love and you live happily ever after[/b]. This simply doesn't happen except in the very rare cases.

I personally believe in unconditional love only, that is the love a parent have for their children and like wise a child has for their parents. Also over a period of time what develops betweens a husband and wife. It isn't a big deal and I not sad git for thinking this way :roll: I just being realistic.

People do get confuse with lust and love, it all stem from the media as Love is big business, nearly all songs are describing love, nearly all movies has a love story and basically it rammed down our throats from a young age. But it also one of the reason that we have a higher Divorce rate then ever, it also why we have loads of single mothers and why we have many youngster commiting suicide and murder in the name of Love. It definitely blind the sense for many people IMO as Love isn't what we think it is, it require a lot of hardwork and sacrifice and people who go round telling everyone how much they are in love, will normally find that they are more in love with the idea. This is just my own opinion and I probably wrong so no one bite my head off about it please, I know it a sensitive subject for some.

"100" wrote:

Seriously Salma, whatever happened in your marriage is what happened, it doesn't mean you can't have love. Sounds like you're cool enough to start moving on from all that.

marriage???

when did i get married n more importantly to who???

"Salma" wrote:

"100" wrote:

Seriously Salma, whatever happened in your marriage is what happened, it doesn't mean you can't have love. Sounds like you're cool enough to start moving on from all that.

marriage???

when did i get married n more importantly to who???

lol wedding was that treadful you dont remember it.

To some guy called Bola... with only a vest a 4 teeth to his name.

I did????

old age must be getting to me lol

u start forgetting things

salma, dont think yr hubby will be too impressed you forgot him

Salam

Who is their right mind would let go of Salma is something I just don't know.

100. Is right.

Omrow

"Omrow" wrote:

Salam

Who is their right mind would let go of Salma is something I just don't know.

100. Is right.

Omrow

but he did though

y???????????

Salam

He did not see you for what you are.

He did not get to truly KNOW your soul, and therefore, he did not appraciate you.

I bet he did not even know how nice your name was.

It is unfortunate that this happened to a girl like you.

Sorry.

Omrow

when do guyz ever take time out to 'get to truly know ur soul'

u can't blame the poor guy

'a girl like me' ? ?