These are sentences actually typed by Medical secretaries in NHS Greater Glasgow
1. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.
3. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status:- Alive, but without my permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical therapy.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale, but present.
25. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
26. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities
27. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
29. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.
30. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Smith, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
31. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
32. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.
">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZBbtk47vZw]
I love the way hes pasted to the wall for like 2 secs and then BAM! 
Comments
lol
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
i nearly chocked of laughter!
my fav's the teenage one. aww man...that was FUNNY!
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Could'nt laugh at any, boring...
If I ever have to kill for something, it would be for, "A woman"
If I ever have to kill something it would have to be, "A woman"
oh im VERY sad to hear tht you didn enjoy that, "boring" in fact!. I can only apologise.. I hope you accept. (but you loved it rlly didn ya, but u cnt admit it cos of the 'persona' ur portraying???? )no worries, thts fine, better next time!
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
Apology accepted, try harder next time...
If I ever have to kill for something, it would be for, "A woman"
If I ever have to kill something it would have to be, "A woman"
@Ripper: thanx and will do! (iA)
@Ocean: dot get ur pants in a twist will ya????!
"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"
here i shall be!
HARAAAAAAAAAM HARAAAAAAAAAAAM! WHAT IS THIS?!?!? HARRAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what else?
HARAAAAAAAAAAAAAM
i cant be bothered.
let's all be happy and laugh.
yet, Bilan, you could have done some islamic censoring and you know, avoid the copy pasting thing...
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
I take responsibility for that - If you look some numbers are missing as I pointed out the inappropriate ones which I thought should be deleted. Left out this one, my bad.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
wouah mashAllah, you actually bothered! and its nothing to apologize, just slipped through net. and Bilan should have been old enough to do it.
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
#Before you look at the thorns of the rose , look at it's beauty. Before you complain about the heat of the sun , enjoy it's light. Before you complain about the blackness of the night, think of it's peace and quiet... #
There's no need for a Spanish inquisition.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
I just knew someone would come out with a response like Ocean's so to avoid being accused of double standards I thought I'd suggest it to Bilan. unfortunately my aim failed.
Move on people.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
I think we all know that regardless of if that stuff was there or not, she wouldn't have been made to delete it. And I don't think anyone truly cares. Obv you haven't moved on if you were planning ahead and anticipating responses with regards to the other blog.
Also, surely if things are censored, it should be because you think it's wrong to have it there, not for fear of being accused of double standards?
#Before you look at the thorns of the rose , look at it's beauty. Before you complain about the heat of the sun , enjoy it's light. Before you complain about the blackness of the night, think of it's peace and quiet... #
It wasn't my post to censor for right/wrong reasons and clearly others don't care about whats right and wrong or don't mind such stuff being on here so it was fine really. I was more concerned about being accused of double standards as that's where I would come in.
"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi
... Nevermind.
#Before you look at the thorns of the rose , look at it's beauty. Before you complain about the heat of the sun , enjoy it's light. Before you complain about the blackness of the night, think of it's peace and quiet... #