Just HAD to share 2 :)
These are sentences actually typed by Medical secretaries in NHS Greater Glasgow
1. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.
3. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status:- Alive, but without my permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical therapy.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale, but present.
25. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
26. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities
27. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
29. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.
30. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Smith, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
31. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
32. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.
I love the way hes pasted to the wall for like 2 secs and then BAM! 😃
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
i nearly chocked of laughter!
my fav's the teenage one. aww man...that was FUNNY!
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
😂
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
Could'nt laugh at any, boring...
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=Jack the Ripper]Could'nt laugh at any, boring...[/quote]
oh im VERY sad to hear tht you didn enjoy that, "boring" in fact!. I can only apologise.. I hope you accept. (but you loved it rlly didn ya, but u cnt admit it cos of the 'persona' ur portraying???? )no worries, thts fine, better next time! 😃
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=bilan][quote=Jack the Ripper]Could'nt laugh at any, boring...[/quote]
oh im VERY sad to hear tht you didn enjoy that, "boring" in fact!. I can only apologise.. I hope you accept. (but you loved it rlly didn ya, but u cnt admit it cos of the 'persona' ur portraying???? )no worries, thts fine, better next time! :D[/quote]
Apology accepted, try harder next time...
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
@Ripper: thanx and will do! (iA)
@Ocean: dot get ur pants in a twist will ya????! :p
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=Ocean]
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Where's the Forum Police when you need it?[/quote]
here i shall be!
HARAAAAAAAAAM HARAAAAAAAAAAAM! WHAT IS THIS?!?!? HARRAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what else?
HARAAAAAAAAAAAAAM
i cant be bothered.
let's all be happy and laugh.
yet, Bilan, you could have done some islamic censoring and you know, avoid the copy pasting thing...
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=Lilly]
yet, Bilan, you could have done some islamic censoring and you know, avoid the copy pasting thing...[/quote]
I take responsibility for that - If you look some numbers are missing as I pointed out the inappropriate ones which I thought should be deleted. Left out this one, my bad.
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE][quote=Lilly]
yet, Bilan, you could have done some islamic censoring and you know, avoid the copy pasting thing...[/quote]
I take responsibility for that - If you look some numbers are missing as I pointed out the inappropriate ones which I thought should be deleted. Left out this one, my bad.[/quote]
wouah mashAllah, you actually bothered! and its nothing to apologize, just slipped through net. and Bilan should have been old enough to do it.
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=Ocean]
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Where's the Forum Police when you need it?[/quote]
😂
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
There's no need for a Spanish inquisition.
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=Lilly]
wouah mashAllah, you actually bothered! and its nothing to apologize, just slipped through net. and Bilan should have been old enough to do it.[/quote]
I just knew someone would come out with a response like Ocean's so to avoid being accused of double standards I thought I'd suggest it to Bilan. unfortunately my aim failed.
Move on people.
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE][quote=Lilly]
wouah mashAllah, you actually bothered! and its nothing to apologize, just slipped through net. and Bilan should have been old enough to do it.[/quote]
I just knew someone would come out with a response like Ocean's so to avoid being accused of double standards I thought I'd suggest it to Bilan. unfortunately my aim failed.
Move on people.[/quote]
I think we all know that regardless of if that stuff was there or not, she wouldn't have been made to delete it. And I don't think anyone truly cares. Obv you haven't moved on if you were planning ahead and anticipating responses with regards to the other blog.
Also, surely if things are censored, it should be because you think it's wrong to have it there, not for fear of being accused of double standards?
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=MakeMeRawr_8TeenF]Obv you haven't moved on if you were planning ahead and anticipating responses with regards to the other blog. [/quote] I know what people are like, clearly what I thought was right, nothing about moving on, I didn't even want to be involved in your blog.
[quote]
Also, surely if things are censored, it should be because you think it's wrong to have it there, not for fear of being accused of double standards?[/quote]
It wasn't my post to censor for right/wrong reasons and clearly others don't care about whats right and wrong or don't mind such stuff being on here so it was fine really. I was more concerned about being accused of double standards as that's where I would come in.
Re: Just HAD to share 2 :)
[quote=ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE][quote=MakeMeRawr_8TeenF]Obv you haven't moved on if you were planning ahead and anticipating responses with regards to the other blog. [/quote] I know what people are like, clearly what I thought was right, nothing about moving on, I didn't even want to be involved in your blog.
[quote]
Also, surely if things are censored, it should be because you think it's wrong to have it there, not for fear of being accused of double standards?[/quote]
It wasn't my post to censor for right/wrong reasons and clearly others don't care about whats right and wrong or don't mind such stuff being on here so it was fine really. I was more concerned about being accused of double standards as that's where I would come in.[/quote]
... Nevermind.
lol