Salaam
When I was in Year 7 I really looked up to the girls in the years above… Befriending people in the year above boosted the popularity of the younger lot…obviously befriending the older lot was easier if you had an older sibling.
In my town there are many older guys who get the younger lot to do their dirty work…they use the younger lot to sell their weed, jack cars or make them do manual labour ….the younger kids buzz of the fact that someone “older and more popular” is paying them attention and sometimes they get a tenner out of doing work for them…
My brother is banned from hanging round with guys who are older than him.
For the past four years I’ve led two study circles a week and have taught in an Islamic Summer School almost every year….I have a small group of 12/13 year olds who attend almost all that I’m involved in….only the other day I realised that these girls do pretty much anything I tell them to do…
I remember when I was 12/13….I didn’t listen to my parents, I ignored my siblings…but the opinion of my mates meant everything to me, esp if they were older then me.
Kids aged 12-15 are incredibly influential…Sheikh Abdul Qadr Jillani (ra) said that at this age kids are like sponges, easily influenced and remember for life what they are exposed to…
I think that those of us who take Islam seriously should all take a young person under their wing…
What do you guys think?
Wasalaam
I think that is a [b]very[/b] good idea.
Sometimes it happens that older students in a madrassah are given classes to teach younger students and it works really well mashaALLAH cos the younger students get an Ustaad who is on the level and the older student gets time to go over his studies. Its something worth considering.
Further its good cos then you know a lot of people in your area. For example if you teaching a class of 7-10 yr olds then overtime you'll get to knw their older brothers/cousins/parents etc. Very beneficial.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
i'm like a sponge, cool!
i don't get influenced by friend or relatives, i do my own thing, that's why i don't know anything about 'the real world' as my friend puts it.
Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.
Please pass on this message urgently to others. Not enough Muslims
are coming forward and these children are ending up in non-Muslim
homes! How are we going to answer to Allah on the Day of Judgement
:roll:
I dont think this thread is about literal adoption-most of us are too young to do that
i have my baby sis under my wing-i dont like the idea of others befrieding my siblings
Insha'allah im gonna consider adoption or fostering in the future...thought about it alot.
Got enough, what can i say such a 'headache'
Whenever i go out they bug so much, ask a million questions..
Get nosey.... disrespectful, call me naj when get told to call me apa
only a few decent ones. I aint got enough patience anymore to deal with em.
thats weird Naj
usually younger lot easily become part of a fan club of young elders
thats what i've seen
and you do not like others hijacking your topics.
I think you may have some control issues... :twisted:
On topic, You wil have to be careful not to pass on bad habits along with the good habits.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
if i adopt a kid, it will be a teenager cuz a teenager can do most stuff by it's self.
Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.
I defntly agree with you ther, as wer living in this society, the younger generation are lacking islam and its teachings so if they wer to have an older person whom they could look up to and follow ther example and learn from them it would be a great help. Also then drugs, crime etc wouldnt be such an issue as the child will no what islam has to say about it and what not.
Oh this thread has a double meaning- very misleading.
Call me pro-active, just thought if someone decided to foster then the link may provide more information- although i know now!
I think it depends on the kids..
My bro teaches at mosque and the kids proper love and respect him even though he doesnt chill and let them have as much fun as me..
I guess they 2 free.
kids usually love me cos i always make time to play with them-if someon's kid comes to my house and her hair needs combing or nappy needs changing I do it ASAP
i'm like that with cousins etc too
my sister has a large fan group of young 12year olds cos she's their "fun islamic teacher"
its easy to win the love of kids-i'm not that big on respect
its not the end of the world if they dont call me "baji"
There has to be a line between ustaad and student. If the Ustaad is too inapproachable, too strict then the kids dont listen properly and disrespect the Ustaad behind his back. If the Ustaad is too lenient and informal the kids lack respect.
Middle line - have to make clear that the Ustaad is the Ustaad. I dont hit that much but sometimes I do and thats how it should be - the worst that I have to say is - Bakr remember Im your Ustaadji and frown at him (Bakr is ficititious) and then get an apology. Funniest thing is I only say that when the kids been really bad and the students know that for me to say that means Im annoyed and that he has overstepped the mark - then ALL the rest of the boys look at the offender - bechara gets embarassed lol.
Personally if a student didnt respect his Ustaad I'd say the Ustaad is wasting his time with such a student if he doesnt mend his ways - 2 boys were kicked outta my class cos of that and they were disruptive to other kids ta'leem aswell. :evil:
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
med, you're an ustaad?
oh my god...
signs of qiyamah are definitely here!
overhere Im representing myself - the gud and the bad.
When teaching I represent the madrassah - then Im on my bestest behaviour ever.
Yeh Signs of Qiyamah began coming when Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam left this world. Wise observation bruv.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
Mad Med hits kids?
and why am i not surprised :roll:
may God have mercy on the poor kids
to all you teachers
when teaching kids you must teach with love, patience , understanding and passion
Hitting kids goes on in every mosque , if children authorities knew about it
imagine the image of islam that would be portrayed
In my mosque the teacher was very strict and would beat us , as a result the kids had no respect , they would swear at the teacher, stick chewing gum in his seat , spit on his car ect
we also had a caretaker who would take pleasure in making kids fight in the middle of the mosque, all the other imams and teachers would jus watch (ask beast) , In one incident a boy swore at the teacher then the imam hit him with the stick that hit the boy in the eyes, his eye was damaged so his dad came in and kicked off with the imam
does anyone know what the phrophet(pbuh) said about disciplining a child by giving him beats ?
Salaam
It’s sad that some people can not get their point/teachings across without resorting to beats. In this country we have the “time out” chair, behaviour ladder/sticker chart or break/lunch time is usually missed if the kid is behaving badly…and this may come as a surprise to some but it does actually work.
An Imam I know was deported back home for hitting a kid…another was sacked….when such things are made public action is usually taken.
I think all parents/siblings should keep an eye on their kids and make sure that they’re not being subjected to such harsh treatment.
As a trainee teacher, I don’t “expect” respect from anyone…”respect” has to be earned. I have never told any student of mine to stand up when I enter the class…yet they all do that anyway…
Most kids call me “baji” or “Miss”…it wouldn’t bother me even if they called me by my first name.
There are some kids I know who now read their prayers reg, cover their head, give charity, or have stopped associating freely with boys….this has taken years of being on at them…but I did that without even having to raise my voice.
Basic psychology will tell you that when a child is taught Islam in a harsh and cruel manner…for the rest of his/her life (unless taught otherwise) they will ascribe negative connotations to Islam.
Wasalaam
I dont think any1s supports beating for the sake of it but a light slap or a scold or doing murgi (my favourite :twisted: ) isnt over the top in my view.
Its unfortunate that peoples values are based on what they see around them particularly what they see in secular institutions as opposed to what has been our Islamic tradition - and it has been our tradition that physical discipline has been used when required - (again Im not talking abt physical abuse cos thats haraam).
If we lived here a few decades ago when they had corporal punishment in schools then those liberals who look down on others who sometimes physically chastise students would say its ok in a context - pity such values are like water - flowing and changing depending on the lie of the land.
Like I said - I dont have to hit much but now and then it has to be done. Generally punishments involve either a detention of half an hour or if its thursday then litterpicking in carpark and roads around the masjid. That works well - alhamdulillah.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
Assalamu alaikum,
I take imams to be responsible adults. So if any child of mine were under their care i'd expect to know if they would be using corporal punishment albeit a slight tap. The point is if i'm the parent of the child it's up to me how my child is disciplined, not the imam or any other person. so the imam should tell me if he will be using the cane, or his hand. If he doesn't inform me i have every right to be angry, and if it resulted in physical harm that was visible such as a bruise or cut i would take things up with the mosque hoping they would deal with it. if they didn't then and only then i'd take it further.
I also agree with Med in the sense that we often cry wolf if the Imam so much as raises his voice at a child or slaps the back of their hand. Falsely accusing Imams of physical abuse on this basis is taking freedom of speech too far. I often wonder if we'd behave the same way towards our imams if we lived in an indopak country for a short time? Where has the respect gone? The same can be said for the way kids treat teachers in state schools.
Sadly sometimes kids misbehave, take in walkmans, chewing gum, swear etc . When the imam reprimands them and informs their parents with the hope of reforming the child's bad behaviour, some parents often turn on the imams and side with their child, knowing full well their child was guilty. This does nothing but reinforce the bad behaviour in the child.
Bottom line if you know the imam will be using a cane and you don't agree with this form of discipline don't admit your child into that particular class very simple really.
P.S the imam in my mosque used to make older boys 12+ clean the toilets if they misbehaved
Girls got better treatment, punishment was usually to make the imam a cupa tea 
sexist but boiling some water isn't too hard!
MashaALLAH gud post - May ALLAH put barakah in it.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
Med do u teach in the Darul Uloom on Coventry Rd in Small Heath B'ham?
wudnt it be a shame if a concerned person annoymously tipped of the social services and told them that a 20year old dentist student from Alum rock thought it was OK to hit kids cos this is what HIS understanding of "traditional islam" preached
do u know of ppl who've falsely accused Imams of physical abuse?
that is so sad. ALLAH protects His Masaajid and His Madaaris - a munafiq caused trouble for certain Darul Ulooms in Bham before - all that happened was that coppers found nothing and the munafiq has earned himself a punishment.
May ALLAH Rabbul Izzat protect the masaajid and madaaris from the open and hidden enemies and make them beacons of knowledge and light and reformation for this Ummah - ameen.
May ALLAH accept the ulama for their services to deen and put barakh in their actions and their speech and make them the coolness of our eyes and contenment of our hearts - ameen.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
And suspicion is a sin......................
Ameen (Med's post)
did that "munafiq" have a problem with ur mosques "islamic traditional" understanding of beating kids?
so ur mosque HAS had problem with the police before
and why am I not surprised? :roll:
and Shaz-what u on?
I aint "Suspicious"-Med admitted himself that he slaps kids and openly stated that this is according to "traditional islam" :roll:
like Shazan said suspicion is a sin.
and the answer to your question is no. Alhamdulillah the masjid o madrassah has never had problems with police.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
well keep on preaching/practsing the "traditional islamic" way to beat kids and i doubt that'd last
Something seriously wrong with your post, and if Med attacked MinHaj on Romford road and took every gossip as the truth, then vultures would half enjoy eating him!
Don’t be supercilious MuslimsSislittleSis, who is being suspicious now !
Shazan has a point.
So does LilSis. (who is going about possibly the worst way possible to make it...)
Lets not allow this to kick off.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
The banner appealing for aid for Kashmir has been removed above the entrance of MinHaj, shouldn’t there be one for Lebanon!
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