Weddings!
Salaam
Its wedding season, many weddings are taking place these days.
I’ve always really loved weddings; they’re such joyous occasions…. However, I do have some issues regarding weddings that I wish to raise.
Firstly, the extravagance that takes place these days is unbelievable…I’m not advocating being a cheapskate, but one should really spend according to their means and should not splash out unnecessary things i.e. hiring out numerous limo’s, getting ice sculptures carved, hiring out extremely expensive venues in the countryside... which all puts people into debt
And why are weddings SO long? How long does it say to say “Kabool”? Must weddings drag on for hours and hours?
Dancing is another issue…personally I love dancing even though my parents always tell me not to…..I don’t see a problem with dancing if there are no males present and if nothing gets recording….I don’t know what Islam says about this though.
But I know that dancing in front of boys is definitely wrong. It’s not right for a woman to dance in front of her dad, uncles, cousins and other strange men…
That’s another thing, why aren’t all weddings segregated? If they were all segregated, women could wear/do whatever they wanted to without any restrictions…
Also, to me weddings are all about the bride. But why is it that, people rate the bride when she enters the wedding hall. Everybody cranes their neck and falls all over themselves to see if the guy's wife-to-be is fit or not.
This is so wrong, what business do strange men have in the Fitness of another man's women!?
And then after everyone rates her she has to sit there like a doll for hours and hours getting bogged out by everyone. Again, ALL weddings should be segregated.
Also, I’ve always believed that if any aspect of culture does not contradict the teachings of Islam then there is nothing wrong with it…and I’ve always been a fan of the “Mehndi” ritual….But some of the rituals that seem to go on in weddings seem to stem out of superstition…or are just plain ridiculous.
e.g taking money and twirling it around the bride/groom's head to take off "nazaar" (the evil eye), oiling the door before the bride enters the home, throwing rice etc etc
Please share your views on all of the above.
Wasalaam
Weddings!
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[quote="ManfromZarqa"]
Blow the dust of you're Quran and start reading it, another suggestion from:
[/quote]
On My
A man of wisdom :roll:
so which page exactly does it say that u shudnt spend more then £500?
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mashaALLAH.
In a hadeeth Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam has stated to the effect that the nikah with the most blessing is the one which is simplest.
Unfortunately we have all been corrupted by culture and society pressure. We consider it mean, stingy to have simple nikah and walima whereas this was the sunnah. Spending £500 on a wedding is mashaALLAH a great blessing.
Remember in nikah khutbah the hadeeth which states to the effect:
"The nikah is my sunnah, and whoever turns away from my sunnah is not from me."
The people who have feeling for islaam are careful to pray their two raka'ah sunnah without any show or ostentation, they make effort to do it in an islamic and pure manner.
The nikah is also a sunnah. To pollute it with lavish expenditure and innovated practices is a pollution of a sunnah.
The marriages which took place in the time of Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam, the Salaf us Saalih, and in the religious circles today are the islamic nikah. The nikah which is done quickly before a lesson in a madrassah, or one that is conducted at the end of a islamic gathering.
Simplicity is key.
The nikah was viewed as a sunnah and was treated as such by the Sahaabah Karaam alayhim ridhwaan, the Salaf us Salih, and the Ulama of Haq throughout all ages.
As an example on one occasion Nabi Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam saw one of the 10 Promised Paradise, Sayyidina AbdurRahman ibn Awf radhiyallahu anh with some coloured stain on his clothing.
Nabi Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam enquired as to what this was due to and Sayyidina AbdurRahman radhiyallah anh informed Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam that I have just got married.
SUBHANALLAH!
One of the 10 Promised Paradise has his nikah done and even does not inform Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam nor does he invite Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam.
Anyone interested should make study of the marriages contracted by Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam, their key feature is simplicity. SubhanALLAH one marriage - I believe the one contracted with Ummul Mumineen Safiyyah radhaiyallahu anha - the walima consisted of the caravan bringing together nuts, old bread, dates, butter and water.
[b]
Remember Nikah is a sunnah, treat it as such and maintain its sanctity.[/b]
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short article on Islamic Wedding by
Mawlana Muhammad Saleem Dhorat Sahib db
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I think ur forgetting a wedding is a time of celebration to which people invite friends and family.
And as this is only a once in a lifetime occurance (or hopefully should be) and since muslims have few days of celebration they kinda go all out. I mean if your inviting all friends and family you're gonna have to have some place to take them coz lets face it your not gonna get them all into your house. So that would typically mean hiring a venue of some kind, and since they are your guest for the day you have to feed them there4 you have to provide food and catering.
And since theres alot of people there and very few other than family actually have a role to perform in the wedding ceremony they will get bored so they need to be entertained, hence playing music, which is not very expensive. And since its a joyious occation and the joining of two people they play happy upbeat music and nothing depressing.
Most of its logic my dear watson.
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Music is haraam.
Bruv course inviting relatives and friends is ok - no1 said its not.
But going over the top is wrong.
So what if it only comes once in your life? Thats not an excuse to waste money, and those who waste money and are extravagant in their wealth are declared the brothers of Shaytan in the Quran.
Spend what is in your capacity, make sure guests are served and looked after, but going and hiring limos and putting up lights and blasting music is satanic.
Weddings!
[quote="Med"]Music is haraam.
Bruv course inviting relatives and friends is ok - no1 said its not.
But going over the top is wrong.
So what if it only comes once in your life? Thats not an excuse to waste money, and those who waste money and are extravagant in their wealth are declared the brothers of Shaytan in the Quran.
Spend what is in your capacity, make sure guests are served and looked after, but going and hiring limos and putting up lights and blasting music is satanic.[/quote]
i think this is another one of those Grey Areas
yes music is haraam... how do u suggest entertaining over 400 people on a tight budget? Its easy to say whats haraam... not so easy to offer an alternative.
You see, people dont consider this a waste of money no matter how much you rant and rave about it. Its a time of joy for them and so they celebrate and that as you very well know costs money and obviously you can only spend what money you have without declaring bankruptcy.
Lights and limos are simply decoration... if you can afford by all means go for it. If you cant... nothing wrong with just decorating your Datson.
Blasting music is obviously wrong... and i wont even go into what types of music is haraam and which isnt as thats a whole different subject.
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LOL.
I know people arent gonna say its lavish, people do all sorts of sins and justify it to themselves.
Music is haraam. How weak can our imaan be if we justify it by saying there is no alternative so lets poison our guests ears with devilish whisperings?
And the weddings I been to with music are the ones where guests are NOT entertained. No1 can hear what the person next to them is chatting. Maybe the art of conversation should be learnt again by the community.
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[quote="Med"]
Music is haraam. How weak can our imaan be if we justify it by saying there is no alternative so lets poison our guests ears with devilish whisperings?
[/quote]
if u say so Med-
but then again u say a lot of things :roll:
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[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="TheManFromZarqa"]
I assume from you’re desi cultural fixation you would opted for a Bollywood themed wedding and Bhangra music?
[/quote]
u assumed wrong mate-
I hate bollywood and diss bhangra
what else have u assumed about a girl u have never met?[/quote]
Quite a lot judging by that depraved post in the Just Chill thread.
That boy still didn't apologize either - am I missing something or when you insult a lady like that aren't you supposed to apologize?
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looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
[size=9]er . . . calm down people.[/size]
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[quote="Med"]
But I warn you, MuslimSister is one of the very popular people here, cussing her or disagreeing with her is gonna get u labelled a cavemen by a lil girl who think music halal
.[/quote]
I call u a cavemen-cos u advocate brides being depressed, big up the woman who takes beats, call shia kafir, advocate their genocide, big up OBL
diss scholars as ahle biddah and slander people as being grave worshippers
consider urself self rightous then post lovey dovey post all over the forum with another member-blatent double standards
that aint got NOTHING to do with u disagreeing with my sister
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k, whatevaa u say lil girl.
Ur very clever.
Btw lilgirl wheres ur post calling ManfromZarqa a dog?
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[quote="TheManFromZarqa"]
jibberjabberjibberjabbermumbojumbo
[/quote]
I aint MuslimSister-put ur glasses on mate
and I know my wedding aint gonna be a disapointment-
and why shud it be?
I have no intention or marrying a tight fisted scrooge or the caveman u mentioned above
[quote="Med"]k, whatevaa u say lil girl.
Ur very clever.[/quote]
u dont need to be clever to pick up ur double standards
anyone with half a brain could do that :roll:
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[quote="Med"]
Btw lilgirl wheres ur post calling ManfromZarqa a dog?[/quote]
I must have pulled a Mad Med and done a U turn :roll:
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[quote="TheManFromZarqa"]
jibberjabberjibberjabbermumbojumbo Allah swt forbid.
[/quote]
I don't know whats more pathetic - an unemployed hack whos hero is a career terrorist with no leg - or an unemployed loser that blasts away at women he's never met because he knows women find him repulsive. Straighten up your act boy and apologize to [u]lilsis [/u]and [u]her sister[/u] or FIND A NEW FORUM TO GET BANNED FROM.
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[quote="TheManFromZarqa"]
Brother Med I think she is a scantily clad sister with a Muslim name.
[/quote]
oh look-another slanderer on board?
Do go on...
what else am I like?
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[quote="Don Karnage"][
I don't know whats more pathetic - an unemployed hack whos hero is a [b]career terrorist with no leg [/b]- or an unemployed loser that blasts away at women he's never met because he knows women find him repulsive. Straighten up your act boy and apologize to [u]lilsis [/u]and [u]her sister[/u] or FIND A NEW FORUM TO GET BANNED FROM.[/quote]
who u referring to there in the bold?
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Enough of this guy - mods hes insulted your [i]muslim sisters[/i] quite literally repeatedly - ranging from the extremely gross in the chill thread - which had to be edited, to the flat out mean spirited in this thread toward her and her big sister - who as of yet has barely said two words to him.
We're just one more in a long chain that he proudly announces he was banned from.
I realize I haven't been receptive based on my own prejudices towards terrorist thugs like zarqawi but this guy went personal on two respected forum members.
Loyalty demands action.
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No I disagree.
I think Admin should PM him, have a word with him. But let him stay.
He is funny.
And DAVE, i dont think he is abu musab, manfromzarqa is just his name.
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[quote="Don Karnage"]Enough of this guy - mods hes insulted your [i]muslim sisters[/i] quite literally repeatedly - ranging from the extremely gross in the chill thread - which had to be edited, to the flat out mean spirited in this thread toward her big sister.
We're just one more ina long chain that he proudly announces he was banned from.
I realize I haven't been receptive based on my own prejudices towards terrorist thugs like zarqawi but this guy went personal on two respected forum members.
Loyalty demands action.[/quote]
allow it Dave
Mr Admin obvioulsy agree's with the man otherwise he wouldnt just sit there
let him diss me-let him call me a "scantily clad girl" and tell me to "spend time alone in a cave with an extremist"
and let him just diss my sister
stuff him and stuff this stupid forum
Bye
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[quote="TheManFromZarqa"]Brother Med I think she is a scantily clad sister with a Muslim name. [/quote]
How on earth can you deduce that from what she has written??? :shock:
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you go away for 2 minutes and come back to chickens who insult women. the man from zarqa must be hen pecked
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[b][color=blue]PLS NOTE SOME OF MR ZARQA'S POSTS HAVE BEEN EDITTED.
IN CLEAR VIOLATION OF THE RULES OF THE FORUM.
NOT A GOOD START FOR A NEW COMER.
WE ARE NOT AMUSED.
BE WARY IM WATCHING YOU.
ThePhantomMod[/color][/b]
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[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="Don Karnage"]Enough of this guy - mods hes insulted your [i]muslim sisters[/i] quite literally repeatedly - ranging from the extremely gross in the chill thread - which had to be edited, to the flat out mean spirited in this thread toward her big sister.
We're just one more ina long chain that he proudly announces he was banned from.
I realize I haven't been receptive based on my own prejudices towards terrorist thugs like zarqawi but this guy went personal on two respected forum members.
Loyalty demands action.[/quote]
allow it Dave
Mr Admin obvioulsy agree's with the man otherwise he wouldnt just sit there
let him diss me-let him call me a "scantily clad girl" and tell me to "spend time alone in a cave with an extremist"
and let him just diss my sister
stuff him and stuff this stupid forum
Bye[/quote]
Yall plannin on doin somethin about this?
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Zarqa that was not impressive.
I am free from this.
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[quote="TheManFromZarqa"][quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="Don Karnage"]
We're just one more ina long chain that he proudly announces he was banned from.
I realize I haven't been receptive based on my own prejudices towards terrorist thugs like zarqawi but this guy went personal on two respected forum members.[/quote]
allow it Dave
stuff him and stuff this stupid forum
Bye[/quote]
[b]Salam Alikum, [/b]
Beast the same way, everyone has deuced me and made provoking assumptions about my allegiance to terrorist because I am from Zarqa. I will only repent once other members have apologise for spreading fitnah and trying to defame me.
[b]Fi Amanullah
ManfromZarqa
Jihad for the Sake of Allah[/b][/quote]
So Phantom - perhaps we can call this strike 2?
Maybe we should hurry the process along before MuslimSister reads Ziggy's little wedding wish and she gets scared off too!
[b]
EDIT: YOU ASSUME CORRECTLY, STRIKE 2
-ThePhantomMod[/b]
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whoa. :shock: what the hell.... :evil:
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[quote="TheManFromZarqa"]Beast the same way, everyone has deuced me and made provoking assumptions about my allegiance to terrorist because I am from Zarqa. I will only repent once other members have apologise for spreading fitnah and trying to defame me. [/quote]
1- What assumptions have people made about you?
2 - How are such assumptions unfair considering that you have a picture of al-Zarqawi as your avatar?
3 - Do you admit that you have spread fitnah and tried to defame other members?
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[quote="ThePhantomMod"]EDIT: YOU ASSUME CORRECTLY, STRIKE 2
-ThePhantomMod[/quote]
See you in the dugout.
[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="ManfromZarqa"]
How much did the Prophet (Sal allahu aleihi wasallam) spent or the companion (Radi Allah Anhu) spend on their lavish weddings?
[/quote]
I think the inflation rates were a lot lower then :roll:[/quote]
[b]Salam Alikum,[/b]
Blow the dust of you're Quran and start reading it, another suggestion from:
[b]ManfromZarqa
Jihad for the Sake of Allah[/b]