Sex and Islam

salaf

A friend asked me a good question regarding sex and islam.

Why is it that muslims are shy to talk about sex nowadays but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?

Forum

MuslimSisLilSis — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 - 16:10

[quote="salaf"] but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?[/quote]

not in public surely

yashmaki — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 - 16:18

they did speak about it but in the right context, usually to do with things like prayers, ghusl, contraception etc etc.

Nowadays sex is everywhere, so much so we think it's quite normal to speak about sex without any sense of modesty. There's a time and place for everything. Talking about ones intimate life with a friend over a cup of tea isn't something our prophet (Saw) or Early muslims did nor encouraged, it's utterly disgusting. Some things are meant to remain private.

Vedeno — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 - 16:18

Its prolly culture. I know alot of Pakistani brothers who would be shy about it but i know black and white brothers who'd ask a question with no hesistation.

Medarris — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 - 16:53

People should be careful exactly what they attribute to Sayyidina Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam and the Sahaabah Karaam alayhim ridhwaan.

When they asked questions regarding matters of intimacy it was done with great bashfulness and modesty - and it was done in regards to finding out about deen - not for general knowledge and this is evident from the ahadeeth regarding this subject.

Not one will be found where this subject is talked about just for general knowledge, or just to pass time or just as a topic of conversation but rather ALL the questions and ALL the discussions about it were done in relation to and in view of religious laws.

Even then the utmost modesty was exhibited. Sayyidina Ali radhiyallahu anh had to ask a question regarding a private concern but was shy to ask Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam due to his relationship through Sayyidatuna Fatimah radhiyallahu anha so someone else was asked to ask about the situation in a general manner, and the answer was recieved.

And then there is the case of one Lady radhiyallahu anha who suffered from a female situation and She radhiyallahu anha got others to ask on her behalf out of bashfulness.

And the curse of ALLAH rests on those who divulge bedroom secrets.

MuslimSister — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 - 17:02

[quote="yashmaki"]they did speak about it but in the right context, usually to do with things like prayers, ghusl, contraception etc etc.

Nowadays sex is everywhere, so much so we think it's quite normal to speak about sex without any sense of modesty. There's a time and place for everything. Talking about ones intimate life with a friend over a cup of tea isn't something our prophet (Saw) or Early muslims did nor encouraged, it's utterly disgusting. Some things are meant to remain private.[/quote]

I agree with Yash, there’s a lack of privacy/modesty nowadays…this issue is more in your face than it should be. Chat shows and soaps encourage the culture of losing your privacy and sense of shame.

However, in regards to learning or teaching people shouldn’t shy away from the issue.

In the time of the Holy Prophet ﷺ the women of Ansar were praised because “their modesty did not prevent them from learning”.

kas — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 - 19:21

Theres nothing wrong with sex, WHAT i know what youre thinking did i just hear him say theres nothing wrong with sex.

Yes sex is actually a blessing because its through this we have children and satisfy our needs.

However just like anything else sex also has rules attached to it and sex is a tool. For example if i have a stick i can use that stick for bad i.e beating someone up to a pulp for no reason or i can do something good with that stick i.e give it to an old person to help them walk etc.

Sex and everything in life which Allah has given us is a blessing which can be used for the better or for the worse depending on our free will.
In this case sex when someone is married is a blessing and can be done whenever you want. Actually there is a dua (prayer) which you can read just before preforming sex that will bless you furthur.

However this is where the tricky part comes into it lol.
Performing sex to someone else who is not you're wife/husband is wrong and people who do this will be cursed it is called Adultry.

People who have sex with whom they please when they are not married are also the cursed ones, this is called fornication.

These two forms of sex are forbidden, thats why it is advisable for someone to get married when they are young coz sexual urges are normal and is a strong urge to fight off. If you are married and performing it with you're partner its all above board.

But if you committing fornication or adultry which is very common nowadays you better stop doing it and repent straight away.

Unfortunately fornication and adultry is everywhere and sometimes it feels like you cant escape it, sometimes it feels like you are doomed like mankind is doomed.

I turn on the tv all i see is sex, i read a newspaper all i see is sex, i turn on the radio and all theyre talking about is sex. I talk to friends and all they talk about is sex, i walk down the street and theres a half naked woman walking down shaking her ass giving me flirty looks.

This damn curse is everywhere thats what shaytaan prays on the most, our weakness.
Like back in the days even in England the women used to dress modestly and wear hijabs like nuns and the men would walk down with their gazes down. Adulterers and fornicaters would be ridiculed.

It seems like that security has gone even in places like Pakistan. I was shocked to see and hear some of the things that happen there.

Everyone just wants to commit adultry and fornication and the worst thing is they think its okay and to stay away from such acts is wrong and theres something wrong why that brother doesnt talk to girls or that sister doesnt flirt with guys and wear makeup.

In Islam it say those people are blessed and will enjoy paradise who when approached by a beautiful man or woman, who they were attracted to kept their distance and did not commit adultry or fornication for fear of Allah S.W.T and the fire of hell.

These people are surely blessed.

Seraphim — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 09:17

lol med you post was very good until you got to the end.

[quote="Med"]
And the curse of ALLAH rests on those who divulge bedroom secrets.[/quote]

I had to lauf at that. 😃

IMO sex is a private matter and should be kept as such even when simply talking about it.

Feel sorry for Doctors tho when talking about it with their patients.... awkward.

Dave — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 12:12

[quote="salaf"]A friend asked me a good question regarding sex and islam.

Why is it that muslims are shy to talk about sex nowadays but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?[/quote]

What is there to talk about? Shariah and the Qur'an aren't shy about what is natural sexual behavior, and anything beyond telling people where the boundaries are seems superfluous and vulgar.

Medarris — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 12:13

[quote="Seraphim"]lol med you post was very good until you got to the end.

[quote="Med"]
And the curse of ALLAH rests on those who divulge bedroom secrets.[/quote]

I had to lauf at that. 😃

.[/quote]

lol - that wasnt me being over zealous. There are ahadeeth which state to the effect what I have written above. In this country it appears that men boast about their activities and women gossip abt their private affairs aswell - as warning that this type of activity is NOT befitting a muslim I added that last line.

Seraphim — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 12:38

[quote="Med"][quote="Seraphim"]lol med you post was very good until you got to the end.

[quote="Med"]
And the curse of ALLAH rests on those who divulge bedroom secrets.[/quote]

I had to lauf at that. 😃

.[/quote]

lol - that wasnt me being over zealous. There are ahadeeth which state to the effect what I have written above. In this country it appears that men boast about their activities and women gossip abt their private affairs aswell - as warning that this type of activity is NOT befitting a muslim I added that last line.[/quote]

lol, i know it was just teh way you put it

kas — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 12:38

[quote="Don Karnage"][quote="salaf"]A friend asked me a good question regarding sex and islam.

Why is it that muslims are shy to talk about sex nowadays but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?[/quote]

What is there to talk about? Shariah and the Qur'an aren't shy about what is natural sexual behavior, and anything beyond telling people where the boundaries are seems superfluous and vulgar.[/quote]

sorry to ask this but are you a muslim?

Seraphim — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 12:52

[quote="kas"][quote="Don Karnage"][quote="salaf"]A friend asked me a good question regarding sex and islam.

Why is it that muslims are shy to talk about sex nowadays but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?[/quote]

What is there to talk about? Shariah and the Qur'an aren't shy about what is natural sexual behavior, and anything beyond telling people where the boundaries are seems superfluous and vulgar.[/quote]

sorry to ask this but are you a muslim?[/quote]

Is that relavant Kas?

kas — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 15:17

[quote="Seraphim"][quote="kas"][quote="Don Karnage"][quote="salaf"]A friend asked me a good question regarding sex and islam.

Why is it that muslims are shy to talk about sex nowadays but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?[/quote]

What is there to talk about? Shariah and the Qur'an aren't shy about what is natural sexual behavior, and anything beyond telling people where the boundaries are seems superfluous and vulgar.[/quote]

sorry to ask this but are you a muslim?[/quote]

Is that relavant Kas?[/quote]

no just curious

Angel — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 15:44

Dave (AKA Don Karnage) aint a Muslim he's a Christian..I agree with your post Dave.

kas — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 16:52

[quote="Angel"]Dave (AKA Don Karnage) aint a Muslim he's a Christian..I agree with your post Dave.[/quote]

Yes he has good posts

Sirus — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 17:16

[quote="kas"][quote="Angel"]Dave (AKA Don Karnage) aint a Muslim he's a Christian..I agree with your post Dave.[/quote]

Yes he has good posts[/quote]

not as good as Vedono's 😛

kas — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 20:09

[quote="Sirus"][quote="kas"][quote="Angel"]Dave (AKA Don Karnage) aint a Muslim he's a Christian..I agree with your post Dave.[/quote]

Yes he has good posts[/quote]

not as good as Vedono's :P[/quote]

probably not

Medarris — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 22:15

[quote="Sirus"]
not as good as Vedono's :P[/quote]

mashaALLAH vedenos are really gud.

Angel — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 23:32

[quote="Sirus"][quote="kas"][quote="Angel"]Dave (AKA Don Karnage) aint a Muslim he's a Christian..I agree with your post Dave.[/quote]

Yes he has good posts[/quote]

not as good as Vedono's :P[/quote]

Do we know this Vedono person, is he an old member :?

Angel — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 23:38

[quote="Admin"]dunno.[/quote]

hmm so why is everyone praising the guy? I have never come across him...

You — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 - 23:42

sense a bit of sarcasm in Sirus' post.

Unless he meant he found them interesting...

Med's and Kas' posts seemes more straight forward...

Sirus — Fri, 30 Jun 2006 - 01:20

i was bieng sarcastic!!

dunno bout everyone else tho

Dave — Sat, 1 Jul 2006 - 04:00

[quote="kas"][quote="Don Karnage"][quote="salaf"]A friend asked me a good question regarding sex and islam.

Why is it that muslims are shy to talk about sex nowadays but the sahaba and the Rasul ﷺ talked about it openly?[/quote]

What is there to talk about? Shariah and the Qur'an aren't shy about what is natural sexual behavior, and anything beyond telling people where the boundaries are seems superfluous and vulgar.[/quote]

sorry to ask this but are you a muslim?[/quote]

Why have people been asking this so often lately?

Angel — Sat, 1 Jul 2006 - 13:31

[quote="Don Karnage"]

Why have people been asking this so often lately?[/quote]

Maybe they don't expect a christian to be posting a lot on a Muslim forum, dunno :?

Mez — Sat, 1 Jul 2006 - 22:18

[quote="Sirus"]marriage proposal?[/quote]

Don't you think thats a bit late...as he is already married! :roll:

Beast — Sat, 1 Jul 2006 - 22:36

But if he was Muslim he could get married again.

[size=9]Something to think about, Dave... [/size]

Dave — Sat, 1 Jul 2006 - 22:51

[quote="Beast"]But if he was Muslim he could get married again.

[size=9]Something to think about, Dave... [/size][/quote]

hahaha that's the kind of comment that will get me in trouble if she ever runs across it!