Chatting To Members Of The Opposite Sex And Your Parents

MuslimSister —

Salaam

So…could you speak to members of the opposite sex in front of your parents?

If I’m ever speaking to a member of an opposite sex, I often ask myself….could I have also carried out this conversation if my parents were with me?

I’m not speaking about undercover relationships, or flirting etc cos none of us should be doing that anyway….I’m speaking about work matters, matters relating to School/uni, or general friends of the family…. etc etc

For me personally…I can speak to anyone without holding back in front of mum, and I pretty much tell her everything anyway…but when it comes to dad it’s a different issue for some reason. Whilst he has never said anything to me - ever regarding this issue…I always shut up or hold back in front of him.

Dad was in a mobile shop with me a few weeks back and I was signing up for a line rental…the salesman in the shop was really friendly and was chatting away to me (obviously to get a sale)…I badly wished he shut up. When I did work experience a while ago in dad’s workplace and his work colleagues would often speak to me regarding work…even then I’d wish they’d shut up.

My uncle is with the MPAC lot and he often brings his friends over for dinner…and when I want to ask them something…or feel infuriated with what they say, I always shut up if dads in the room.

When Mosque lot, or Uni or my manager from work phones me at home….I dislike it when they make small talk to me and dads in the room…

It’s weird…since my parents are pretty laid back people and have never lectured me on this issue, and compared to most parents I find them VERY liberal at times….He has never expressed his dislike regarding this issue, nor has he ever said anything to me...

I really feel for the girls who go through the arranged marriage process and their meetings are always chaperoned by their father…most girls wouldn’t open up if their father was in the room.

OR is it correct to say, that if one can’t speak to others in front of their parents…this must mean that they have something to hide?

Do share your thoughts…

Wasalaam

Forum

Seraphim — Wed, 19 Apr 2006 - 12:26

I talk to everyone in pretty much the same way regardless of whose in the room. I had a collegue from uni ring me on my mobile when i was sat at home with family.

I just answered it like normal and told my parents who it was later. They werent that bothered.

Funny thing was she asked me where i was and i said im at home sat with family... then i said why? Do you wanna chat to my mom?? Which she promptly said no...thanx.

Then i offered to speak to her mom... which she turned down... oh well.

RuBz — Wed, 19 Apr 2006 - 12:32

[quote="MuslimSister"]Salaam

So…could you speak to members of the opposite sex in front of your parents?

If I’m ever speaking to a member of an opposite sex, I often ask myself….could I have also carried out this conversation if my parents were with me?

I’m not speaking about undercover relationships, or flirting etc cos none of us should be doing that anyway….I’m speaking about work matters, matters relating to School/uni, or general friends of the family…. etc etc

For me personally…I can speak to anyone without holding back in front of mum, and I pretty much tell her everything anyway…but when it comes to dad it’s a different issue for some reason. Whilst he has never said anything to me - ever regarding this issue…I always shut up or hold back in front of him.

Dad was in a mobile shop with me a few weeks back and I was signing up for a line rental…the salesman in the shop was really friendly and was chatting away to me (obviously to get a sale)…I badly wished he shut up. When I did work experience a while ago in dad’s workplace and his work colleagues would often speak to me regarding work…even then I’d wish they’d shut up.

My uncle is with the MPAC lot and he often brings his friends over for dinner…and when I want to ask them something…or feel infuriated with what they say, I always shut up if dads in the room.

When Mosque lot, or Uni or my manager from work phones me at home….I dislike it when they make small talk to me and dads in the room…

It’s weird…since my parents are pretty laid back people and have never lectured me on this issue, and compared to most parents I find them VERY liberal at times….He has never expressed his dislike regarding this issue, nor has he ever said anything to me...

I really feel for the girls who go through the arranged marriage process and their meetings are always chaperoned by their father…most girls wouldn’t open up if their father was in the room.

OR is it correct to say, that if one can’t speak to others in front of their parents…this must mean that they have something to hide?

Do share your thoughts…

Wasalaam[/quote]

I cant chat to any1 in front ov ma stepmom or dad cuz if im on the fone then they fink its a guy which was tru before but not as much neways even with guests i get scared in front ov ma parents in case i say sumthin wrong then il get in2 trouble later even for tryna be polite now dats confusin so i just stay stomp now. easy way out.

RoSeAnGeL — Wed, 19 Apr 2006 - 19:32

If I speak to anyone of the opposite sex infront of my parents, they get curious as to who that person is and why they're so friendly....so that always makes it akward even though I don't have anything to hide, I still could never speak openly to someone infront of a parent. Even though parents are just trying to keep an eye on there children sometimes they go too far with that...my mom use to ease drop on my calls! lolz but i dont have anything to hide, so its all good.

Omrow — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 - 22:26

Salam

You are supposed to have respect for your parents. You must not treat them the same as your friends. You ought to be extra polite and good mannered in front of your mum and dad.

When I go to my friends homes and his dad or uncle are in the room, I respect them too. This means while they are present I don't do loose chat. I talk formally with them. We discuss various topics. We have a drink together. Its a very business like conversation. We do have many great laughs.

Its just a different type of fun.

One ought to speak with everyone according to their position.

You can't treat everyone the same. Life doesn't work that way.

Omrow

*DUST* — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 - 22:33

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]tis no biggie

some ppl get embarrassed for no reason

i have no issues with talking in front of my parents to guys-i have nothing to hide

but some parents are just PSYCHO when it comes to this issue[/quote]
i agree. if it's work-related i don't see why one should feel embarassed in front of their parents. i suppose we dont want them getting the wrong idea, but thats more likely to happen if we hide things from them. might as well be open.

iRazor — Fri, 21 Apr 2006 - 22:38

[quote="Omrow"]No. About funny little furbals.[/quote]

That was almost a good comback, but then i realised, u talk about the forum to ya mates, of whom none are on the forum.

So ya life revolves around ya e-life, WOW, LOL, im jokin.

U kno wat tho Omrow, u a funny guy, do u hav a blog? im guessin it wud b funny.

iRazor — Fri, 21 Apr 2006 - 23:08

So u sayin he a crazy man? like he's got multiple personalities. N he likes things which no1 even considers liking, n that he lives in a crazy house jus off the coast of the mediteranean cuz hes too dangerous to be let outta in normal civilisation, that what wat ur sayin?

Dawud — Mon, 24 Apr 2006 - 23:53

[quote="razor"][quote="Ramz"]Whenever I'm on the friend with a guy Rashid becomes "Rashida", Sajid becomes "Sajidah" Zubair becomes "Zubaida" 😃
And all the "he's" become "she's"[/quote]

LOL, This is too common :wink:[/quote]

Actually I do that sometimes when I'm talking to guys, it was hillarious when my mate John started calling my friend Stuart, 'Hillary'.

Seraphim — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 - 10:07

lol, when ever i answer a call on my mobile infront of my parents they naturally want to know who it is. So i'll say things like its my english girlfriend or its my secret wife with 3 kids. Always cracks my mum up... plus then i dont have to actualy say who im speaking to.

MuslimSisLilSis — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 - 15:31

[quote="Ramz"]Whenever I'm on the friend with a guy Rashid becomes "Rashida", Sajid becomes "Sajidah" Zubair becomes "Zubaida" 😃
And all the "he's" become "she's"[/quote]

LOL

when i'm on the phone with a girl mate i usually pretend that its a guy

only to wind mum up and see her reaction

she pretends to be shocked-but she aint really bothered-she clocks that I'm trying to tease her

she knows what her kids are like

Omrow — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 - 21:24

Salam

[quote="Ramz"]Whenever I'm on the friend with a guy Rashid becomes "Rashida", Sajid becomes "Sajidah" Zubair becomes "Zubaida" 😃
And all the "he's" become "she's"[/quote]

So, would your "Arram" be an Arrami ?

Omrow

Seraphim — Wed, 26 Apr 2006 - 15:58

[quote="Omrow"]
[quote="Ramz"]Whenever I'm on the friend with a guy Rashid becomes "Rashida", Sajid becomes "Sajidah" Zubair becomes "Zubaida" 😃
And all the "he's" become "she's"[/quote]

So, would your "Arram" be an Arrami ?

Omrow[/quote]

well that or Armani... which ever comes first.

iRazor — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 - 00:44

[quote="Omrow"]Salam

You didn't get the joke.

Alright. Arami means a [b]bastard[/b].

By the way, the name was ancient Assyrian; and it means top man.

Omrow[/quote]

U swore :shock:

Top Man? Thas kinda gay, r u gay?

Cuz gay is one step down from uncool, n u r very, very uncool

Seraphim — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 - 13:15

[quote="Omrow"]Salam

You didn't get the joke.

Alright. Arami means a bastard.

By the way, the name was ancient Assyrian; and it means top man.

Omrow[/quote]

Yes i did understand the joke Omrow, just didnt think it needed explaining and a translation.

Very very uncool.