Where's The Honour In This?
Family guilty of 'honour killing'
A father and his two sons have been found guilty of murdering his daughter's boyfriend in an "honour killing" after she became pregnant.
Arash Ghorbani-Zarin, 19, was found stabbed 46 times in a car in Rosehill, Oxford, on 20 November last year.
The Iranian Muslim had been studying at Oxford Brookes University.
Chomir Ali, 44, was found guilty of ordering sons Mohammed Mujibar Rahman, 19, and Mamnoor Rahman, 16, to kill Mr Ghorbani-Zarin, at Oxford Crown Court.
During the trial, the court heard the two sons killed Mr Ghorbani-Zarin due to the "shame and dishonour" brought on the family by his relationship with Manna Begum.
The pair met in 2003 through school friends, who described them as devoted to each other, with Miss Begum becoming pregnant in August 2004.
But Miss Begum's father, a Bangladeshi-born waiter, had planned for her to have an arranged marriage.
Her brother, Mujibar Rahman, was also furious at his sister's "blatant" defiance and had previously slapped her for refusing to end the relationship.
After the killing, the DNA of Mamnoor Rahman was found on a knife.
The Rahman brothers' blood-stained clothing was also found in a plastic bag, which street sweepers saw being thrown into an Oxford allotment by their father, three days after the murder.
In summing up the trial, which lasted four weeks, Mr Justice Gross said the Western-style relationship caused a "battle of wills" in Miss Begum's family, as she resisted pressure to conform.
Det Ch Insp Steve Tolmie, of Thames Valley Police, said the murder was "a horrific, violent attack on an innocent young man with a lot to live for.
"No-one has the right to take away someone's life for whatever reason and people who choose to do this will be punished, as shown today."
[url=http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/oxfordshire/4407728.stm]BBC News[/url]
Where's The Honour In This?
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="angel"]Admin why was the other thread deleted, "perfect man for a women" or "perfect woman for a man" or sometin?[/quote]
Not deleted by me.
Where's The Honour In This?
o u gonna lock this as well?!
discuss honour killings in general...........theres loadza stuff happenin to do with this
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Admin"][quote="angel"]Admin why was the other thread deleted, "perfect man for a women" or "perfect woman for a man" or sometin?[/quote]
Not deleted by me.[/quote]
so where did it go? could it have been the other mods, but why?
Or was it cuz the forum was down for a while?
Where's The Honour In This?
it was deleted after the forum update. I have no idea why.
Honour killings: they are wrong. Plain and simple.
However how would YOU deal with a close family memner in the same situation?
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Admin"]However how would YOU deal with a close family memner in the same situation?[/quote]
would depend on how the person was related to me...
how would you respond if say hypotheticaly speaking your sister was in the above dilema :?:
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="angel"]Admin why was the other thread deleted, "perfect man for a women" or "perfect woman for a man" or sometin?[/quote]
Yeah I find it funny how this thread was started after that thread but somehow that one got deleted and this one didn't when they upgraded the forum. I personally think the girl didn't like getting cussed or getting called attention seekers and somehow deleted it :roll:
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Ramz"][quote="MuslimSister"]
I have no issue with bending (giving in). I can't see myself ever kicking up a fuss for anyone.[/quote]
Your a very clever girl MS, no one can deny that. But this point of yours makes you seem weak. For the last three years I've been fighting with my parents for the right to marry my man, and this is a battle I will never stop fighting for.
[/quote]
Salaam
You’re entitled to your opinion.
I think the world of my parents and I’m very close to them-esp mum. If I was in such a dilemma I’d do what my parents wanted me to do.
I can never be happy or at peace if they were unhappy or stressed out cos of me. Personally, I think this is one of my strong points-not a weakness. I very rarely act on my emotions.
And Admin, please don’t encourage Muslim girls to run away from home just to prove a point. I know she’s getting desperate and her parents are being unreasonable, however running away accomplishes nothing and brings a lot of grief and heartache to parents.
Wasalaam
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="yuit"]
Yeah I find it funny how this thread was started after that thread but somehow that one got deleted and this one didn't when they upgraded the forum. I personally think the girl didn't like getting cussed or getting called attention seekers and somehow deleted it :roll:[/quote]
what me? As if, i wanted that thread to stay up, i wasnt finished still needed to make a few comments :evil:
I agree with Muslimsis, when you can control your emotions and not let them get the better of you that is seen as a strong point, which i still need to work on :?
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="MuslimSister"]And Admin, please don’t encourage Muslim girls to run away from home just to prove a point. I know she’s getting desperate and her parents are being unreasonable, however running away accomplishes nothing and brings a lot of grief and heartache to parents.
[/quote]
i gotta agree with admin
imo must muslim families r too clingy to the girls
running away is the best solution
WAY TO GO ADMIN 😃
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Judda"][quote="MuslimSister"]And Admin, please don’t encourage Muslim girls to run away from home just to prove a point. I know she’s getting desperate and her parents are being unreasonable, however running away accomplishes nothing and brings a lot of grief and heartache to parents.
[/quote]
i gotta agree with admin
imo must muslim families r too clingy to the girls
running away is the best solution
WAY TO GO ADMIN :D[/quote]
Most girls who do run away just to come back, why make such a silly decison which is causing grief to everyone and then come back as if nothing has happened?
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="angel"][quote="yuit"]
Yeah I find it funny how this thread was started after that thread but somehow that one got deleted and this one didn't when they upgraded the forum. I personally think the girl didn't like getting cussed or getting called attention seekers and somehow deleted it :roll:[/quote]
what me? As if, i wanted that thread to stay up, i wasnt finished still needed to make a few comments :evil:
[/quote]
Yeah i sure, you couldn't accept that we were having a decent discussion on the thread and you had to destory t.
Interesting case, i wonder what the father is going through now. Because the title of the thread says it all, where is the honour. Even if you look pass the obivious wrong of this case, you still have to ask yourselves by bringing the issue into the eye of the public surely the family honour is more destoryed.
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="angel"][quote="Judda"][quote="MuslimSister"]And Admin, please don’t encourage Muslim girls to run away from home just to prove a point. I know she’s getting desperate and her parents are being unreasonable, however running away accomplishes nothing and brings a lot of grief and heartache to parents.
[/quote]
i gotta agree with admin
imo must muslim families r too clingy to the girls
running away is the best solution
WAY TO GO ADMIN :D[/quote]
Most girls who do run away just to come back, why make such a silly decison which is causing grief to everyone and then come back as if nothing has happened?[/quote]
angle if u kill a girl- its over she is never coming back...
if a girl runs away u miss her and then u realise u want her back and then u dont kill her in the end
everyone is happy and no1 gets hurt
honour killing sickens me :x more then shirk :x
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Judda"]
angle if u kill a girl- its over she is never coming back...
if a girl runs away u miss her and then u realise u want her back and then u dont kill her in the end
everyone is happy and no1 gets hurt
honour killing sickens me :x more then shirk :x[/quote]
Eh dumbo i wasnt talkin bout this story, just talkin bout girls running away in general. "honour" killings sickens me also.
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="angel"]
Most girls who do run away just to come back, why make such a silly decison which is causing grief to everyone and then come back as if nothing has happened?[/quote]
They do come back. But most parents (esp Asian parents) never get over this....
One should never put their parents through that.
Where's The Honour In This?
stuff like that happens
the parents r da one with the problem
no1 is sinless
i know it brings a hell of a lot of "shame on the family" but imo da shame is no big deal, u shud only care about what god thinks of u
Where's The Honour In This?
Disrespecting and not complying to ur parents wishes just because your heart is telling u your head over heels in love with a guy :roll: or because your emotions are so mixed up you cant differentiate between whats halal and what is haram 🙁 is No REASON whatsoever to deny the fact that running away or eloping with a brother or sister is against the teachings of Islam!
This above statement is not directed at anyone in paticular I just strongly feel that in most 'honour killings' parents are blamed when in reality MAYBE just maybe the killings wouldnt occur if brothers and sisters realised and understood the above! :evil:
[b]No matter how unreasonable, unfair, or bias parents may seem there decisions NEED to be respected at all times! [/b] :!:
Where's The Honour In This?
u CANNOT accept honour killing
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="MuSlImAh786"][quote="Admin"]However how would YOU deal with a close family memner in the same situation?[/quote]
would depend on how the person was related to me...
how would you respond if say hypotheticaly speaking your sister was in the above dilema :?:[/quote]
No idea.
I may be angry, or may be symathetic. I may not wanna know the person... or I may just laugh.
I have no idea how I would react.
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Judda"]u CANNOT accept honour killing[/quote]
not condoning honour killings astaghfarullah :x
just think about this WHY did it happen in the first place?...
because a sister disobeyed her father, went against her deen and astaghfarulla commited adultry!... :evil:
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="MuSlImAh786"][quote="Judda"]u CANNOT accept honour killing[/quote]
not condoning honour killings astaghfarullah :x
just think about this WHY did it happen in the first place?...
because a sister disobeyed her father, went against her deen and astaghfarulla commited adultry!... :evil:[/quote]
Its totally wrong what the girl and guy did but the father commiting murder is no way justified, as sum1 has pointed b4 if the parents give proper upbringing then the child should turn out fine.
Where's The Honour In This?
no-one said its justified. everyone agees it was wrong.
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Admin"]
We do need a straight answer from med. He is ducking divig and weaving on the issue.
[/quote]
A straigt answer?
I refer you to my above posts, killing her was rong, her brothers actions we rong, her actions were rong, the man who is dead was rong.
I havent said that any of those acts were good admin brother.
I only say I understand. I dnt think its right, but I understand for sure. What other questions need to be straight answered?
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Med"]
[b]Was it rong to kill him?
Yes
Was it rong to repeatedly stab him?
Yes
Was it rong for her to be a cheap woman?
Yes
Was it rong for him to be pervert man?
Yes[/b]Btw, those of intellect will note that trying to paint me as a some loose cannon with dodgy views is a futile act. Virtually ALL arab countries have a portion of their law which deals with ''honour'' killings and they say that if a woman behaves in a way to agitate the slef honour ''ghairat'' of a man then he is considered to be under DIMINISHED RESPONSIBILTY if he kills or beats her or the perpetrator on his honour.
This is not to say its right, but it is merely to point out that my UNDERSTANDING that stance and to some extent sympathising with the father and brothers isnt the weird lone view that the people devoid of understanding try to paint it out. It is a common and widespread view.
Again[b] I SAY I DONT THINK ITS RIGHT, I MERELY SAY I UNDERSTAND.[/b]
[/quote]
Where's The Honour In This?
you gave a straight answer, but to the wrong question.
the question you duck on is 'Who is/are the ahlul Biddah?'.
But on this topic if honour killing, we mostly agree.
Where's The Honour In This?
Brother if u want me to say SPECIFICALLY who is Ahlul Bid'ah then I cannot say. I cant label a specific person as bidate just cos I read a few posts on net.
The Ahlul Bid'ah in general are those who engage in innovated practices. eg milad, urs, qawwali, khatms, tinsel town in the mosque etc. These are signs of Ahlul Bid'ah. Do you want me to say if you do these things then you are bidatee? Then even I cannot put such a label on any1, these things are acts of innovation IN OUR VIEW, but I still cant label SPECIFIC people as bidatee on the basis of a few posts. Perhaps if I met people, discussed AT LENGTH, with them, what they believe, what they practice then maybe I might say such a person is from Ahlul Bid'ah but I cannot specifiy at this time.
Further does any1 deny that Ahlul Bid'ah exist?
I would appreciate an answer to this qsn.
Where's The Honour In This?
yes. I deny any such group exists. It is only used as slander.
You classify things as Bid'ah which are not bid'ah.
Where's The Honour In This?
but then how do your Ulama explain the hadeeth which states to the effect on Yawmul Qiyaamah, when the Ummah is queuing to have their thirst quenched at the Hands of Nabi Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam at the Pond of Kawthar, that the angels come and drag a group of people out of the line. Then the Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam enquires as to them, and is distressed over them, and the angels respected inform Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam abt the new things they introducede, and Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam turns away in anger.
Surely, every1 must agree there are Ahlul Bid'ah, people who have innovated in religion. What I can understand, is people DIFFERING on who the innovated sects, or people are, but I cant understand a view that there are NO INNOVATERS in religion?
Where's The Honour In This?
[quote="Med"]
The Ahlul Bid'ah in general are those who engage in innovated practices. eg milad, urs, qawwali, khatms, tinsel town in the mosque etc. These are signs of Ahlul Bid'ah. Do you want me to say if you do these things then you are bidatee? Then even I cannot put such a label on any1, these things are acts of innovation IN OUR VIEW, but I still cant label SPECIFIC people as bidatee on the basis of a few posts. Perhaps if I met people, discussed AT LENGTH, with them, what they believe, what they practice then maybe I might say such a person is from Ahlul Bid'ah but I cannot specifiy at this time.
Further does any1 deny that Ahlul Bid'ah exist?
I would appreciate an answer to this qsn.[/quote]
You talk bout Milad as being "Bidah" yet in another thread you said "milad" is an original act, i am left confused :? why two contradicting views? Bidah according to you is what is wrong so why say Milad Sharif is Jaiz in another thread and label it Bidah in this thread! See below:
[quote="Med"]
The milah parties in theory are jaiz. If incidents relating to seerah are mentioned, if deen is mentioned, if ALLAH and Rasul salallahu alayhi wa sallam are mentioned. This much is alhamdulillah good
The milad is permitted act originally but it has been made into a part of religion, and is considered obligatory.
[/quote]
Where's The Honour In This?
the milad in itself is jaiz. I didnt say it is an original act. it was permitted orginally.
It is jaiz in the sens that having talks on Nabi Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam is gud. But its what has become part of it. The marking 12th of Rabi ul Awwal, the tinsel, the interminglings, the qawwali, the excessive spenditure, the swears at non attendees etc.
The aspect of milad that is jazi is the speeches on deen, the act of marking the Prophets salallahu alayhi wa sallam's birthday is innovated and an imitation of the Cross worshippers.
The Milad has no basis in the early generations.
This is not a post on milad, admin wanted to knw who Ahlul Bid'ah are. I answered. I shall try not to mess this thread with milad topic.
Ok, back to topic.
Lets summarise:
1. Girl did wrong, boyfriend also did wrong.
2. father, brothers did wrong. Boy died.
everyone has judged father/brothers etc.
Med also judged girl. 'Ed does not think we should judge the girl...
But she also did wrong.
what is there left to discuss?