Time for me to get married

Published by Northen Southener on 11 July, 2012 - 13:01

So - it's about time I got married.

I found a woman who was willing to take me regardless of the mess I was.

So, I went to her to get married. Arranged everything (food, guests outfits etc etc)

Then came the day of the Nikkah. The Imam said "How much "Haq Mehr" you putting down?"

I thought "You what? what's one of those?"

So my dad said the amount while I still wondered what this was.

Sheepishly I asked "What is the Haq Mehr?"

So the Imam began to explain "It's a payment that a man makes to his wife before the Nikkah. It's purpose is to protect the woman. So that she has something to fall back on if the marriage fails. So she can get by for a bit until she sorts stuff out."

What a grand idea I though. I love being part of Islam. This is justice if I ever saw it. Planning ahead for every eventuality.

"So the Gold is a part of this too is it?" I asked, wanting to know more about this grand plan.

"No, the gold is a gift from you to her, but the Mehr is a mandatory part of the Nikkah. With the gold, if SHE decides to end the marriage, must be returned" replied the Imam.

Hmmm... I saw how much my dad handed over as the Mehr. It wasn't even enough to get her a train ticket back to her parents if things went bad between us let alone "getting by" until things were sorted out.

So I concluded that it's just a token gesture rather than a practical solution if things went pear shaped.

Comments

Submitted by Northen Southener on 11 July, 2012 - 18:56

Golden Darkness wrote:

btw i though you were married already???

I AM married. This is what happened 12 years ago. But someome posted something on Facebook about Mahr and I thought I'll put a blog on here and get everyones thoughts and opinion on it and let people share their knowledge on the topic.

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Submitted by LookingToSee on 11 July, 2012 - 20:34

Teach us mre abt mahr please

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Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Submitted by TPOS on 11 July, 2012 - 21:06

Lilly wrote:
Teach us mre abt mahr please

What did you learn from the topic on mahr, you created?

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"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi

Submitted by LookingToSee on 11 July, 2012 - 22:37

TPOS wrote:

Lilly wrote:
Teach us mre abt mahr please

What did you learn from the topic on mahr, you created?

 

I did such a thing?!

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Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Submitted by Northen Southener on 12 July, 2012 - 20:57

I came across this video earlier in the day. Althought it's not primarily about this topic, it does make an interesting reference to the maximum value of Mahr. The guys were trying to set an upper limit, but a woman in on the board advocated against it and it was decided that they will not have an upper limit.

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