Number of unmarried women increases every year

Mujahid'

Doesn't this sounds like a BIG problem?. I mean what would happen when there are huge number of unmarried women around us?. Currently, you can find a lot of unmarried women who are now over 30, 40, 50 and above. These women desperately want to get married but who would go for an old woman while they can find younger one easily?. The thing is that, most people are afraid to marry to a woman who has passed over 30 coz no one believe that a woman could stay upto that age without making love, so, this is really scarry thing to most men. We keep on asking ourselves, why wasn't she married till now?. there must be something bad she did that no one wants to marry her.. and the story keeps on going on and on. eventually these girls stay like that for the rest of their lives... Sometimes they do get married to an old men, I mean very old, or those who are divorced...

My advice to women is that, you get married as soon as you get a man who wants you. Men have more choice than you. Another thing, never agree to have a man as your boyfriend coz he will keep out soon after he has used you. I wouldn't marry a woman a played with, so why should others?.

Women should also agree to marry a married men coz they have no much of choice. Once a man of any kind approach to marry you, you must agree and be happy.

That is all folks

Forum

laila — Sun, 24 Jul 2005 - 14:58

i dont know about village mentality but i do know about jaheelat ie jahil ple and their mentality.

illiteracy is no criteria for this indeed many illiterate ple from the villages are wise and receptive to good ideas & ways of living islamically

However Jahil ple are a whole special breed to them their ancestral laws and traditions are written in stone and never to be messed with - they dont care if practices are islamic or not

MuslimSisLilSis — Sun, 24 Jul 2005 - 15:48

[quote="Admin"]

and what's wrong with village mentality? I may as well get details.[/quote]

I'm generalising

but from what I've seen illiterate villagers are more likely to hold the view that forced marraiges are OK, unmarried girls are a burden, believe in the caste system and would favour girls over boys

of course some educated people are like that too

but overall illiterate villagers would be MORE likely to hold such views cos thats what they've been taught

a handful of girls I know from my place were forced into marrige to guys from back home-and maried of at a very young age, were seen as being a "burden" and in all cases their parents were illiterate

laila — Sun, 24 Jul 2005 - 21:36

illiteracy is not akin to stupidity illiterate ple can be very knowledgeable

i think i'll stick to the jahil view these ple can be well educated but still hold the same suffocationg views of their elders

however it would appear that most jahil ple do appear to be illiterate as well what a bummer

*DUST* — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 01:24

[quote="almas"]Seraph stop quoting Dr Zakir Naik women becoming public property... I've heard that talk as well. I've said before that mans entertaining but he gets basic islamic things so wrong how can anyone trust him.[/quote]
huh? wots so bad about Dr. Zakir Naik?

MuslimSisLilSis — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 09:29

[quote="Aasiyah"][quote="almas"]Seraph stop quoting Dr Zakir Naik women becoming public property... I've heard that talk as well. I've said before that mans entertaining but he gets basic islamic things so wrong how can anyone trust him.[/quote]
huh? wots so bad about Dr. Zakir Naik?[/quote]

if the guy has referred to women being "public property" then there's a LOT of things wrong with him

*DUST* — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 12:43

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="Aasiyah"][quote="almas"]Seraph stop quoting Dr Zakir Naik women becoming public property... I've heard that talk as well. I've said before that mans entertaining but he gets basic islamic things so wrong how can anyone trust him.[/quote]
huh? wots so bad about Dr. Zakir Naik?[/quote]

if the guy has referred to women being "public property" then there's a LOT of things wrong with him[/quote]
"IF" being the main word in tht^ sentence... 😉

still waiting for seema's answer tho.... :?:

Aphrodite — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 13:14

As a divorcee who should be completely jaded by the idea of marriage, I just don't get people who never want to get spliced.

I know I'm making little sense, but I need food right now. Will maybe return after my brain is sugarred up 😛

Seraphim — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 19:08

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="Aasiyah"][quote="almas"]Seraph stop quoting Dr Zakir Naik women becoming public property... I've heard that talk as well. I've said before that mans entertaining but he gets basic islamic things so wrong how can anyone trust him.[/quote]
huh? wots so bad about Dr. Zakir Naik?[/quote]

if the guy has referred to women being "public property" then there's a LOT of things wrong with him[/quote]

As opposed to nothing being wrong with un-married girls walking around... they may aswell have a target painted on their heads to be harrassed.

But if you think girls can take it.

Be my guest, i wont loose no sleep over it.

MuslimSister — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 19:13

[quote="Seraph"]
As opposed to nothing being wrong with un-married girls walking around... they may aswell have a target painted on their heads to be harrassed.

But if you think girls can take it.

Be my guest, i wont loose no sleep over it.[/quote]

So unmarried women are more likely to be harrassed then married women?

How can one tell the difference? Since when did a Muslim married woman look any different to an unmarried woman?

Only Hindu women have that necklace round their neck to show that their married...

Seraphim — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 19:14

[quote="MuslimSister"][quote="Seraph"]
As opposed to nothing being wrong with un-married girls walking around... they may aswell have a target painted on their heads to be harrassed.

But if you think girls can take it.

Be my guest, i wont loose no sleep over it.[/quote]

So unmarried women are more likely to be harrassed then married women?

How can one tell the difference? Since when did a Muslim married woman look any different to an unmarried woman?

Only Hindu women have that necklace round their neck to show that their married...[/quote]

Guys can tell....

We have our ways.

Seraphim — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 19:21

[quote="MuslimSister"][quote="Seraph"]
Guys can tell....

We have our ways.[/quote]

Identify some of the differences.

Personally I can't tell the difference.[/quote]

Let me break it down for you:

A guy talks to a girl in passing she tells him shes married etc guy nolonger thinks asian girl he thinks sister and will avoid thinking in any other terms.

A guy talks to a girl in passing shes tells him shes not married yet guy thinks he's in with a chance.

Ofcourse the above is a bit of a generalisation and will be tru of a majority of people (u always get some weirdos).

Hav i made my point?

MuslimSister — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 19:26

[quote="Seraph"]

Let me break it down for you:

A guy talks to a girl in passing she tells him shes married etc guy nolonger thinks asian girl he thinks sister and will avoid thinking in any other terms.

A guy talks to a girl in passing shes tells him shes not married yet guy thinks he's in with a chance.

Ofcourse the above is a bit of a generalisation and will be tru of a majority of people (u always get some weirdos).

Hav i made my point?[/quote]

Nope.

Cos most girls that I know would ignore such a question.

Most girls have no inclination to discuss their marital status with strange guys...

Guy only thinks that he's "in with a chance" if the girl allows him to think that or if he's a shamless guy.

MuslimSister — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 19:29

[quote="Aphrodite"]As a divorcee who should be completely jaded by the idea of marriage, I just don't get people who never want to get spliced.

I know I'm making little sense, but I need food right now. Will maybe return after my brain is sugarred up :P[/quote]

Some friends of mine recently got out of nightmare marriages which has made them “anti-marriage”…its totally understandable.

Other's have re-married...it all depends on the individual.

Personally, I have nothing against marriage overall, however I have a serious issue with the way two people get together in our culture.

You — Mon, 25 Jul 2005 - 23:32

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]girls who are unmarried are more likely to get harrassed then married women?

TYPICAL backwards thinking :roll: :roll:[/quote]

So you'd rather the married ones were more harrassed?

Both are bad, but unfortunately its reality.

MuslimSisLilSis — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 09:51

[quote="Admin"][quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]girls who are unmarried are more likely to get harrassed then married women?

TYPICAL backwards thinking :roll: :roll:[/quote]

So you'd rather the married ones were more harrassed?

Both are bad, but unfortunately its reality.[/quote]

Did I say that? :roll:

NEITHER should be harrased

but never have I come across or even heard someone say that unmarried girls are more likely to be harrassed

most girls DONT discuss their marital status with guys

and other unmarraied girls if they know that the guy is dodgy just tell the guy that they're already married-even if they're not

Aphrodite — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 10:29

[quote="MuslimSister"][quote="Aphrodite"]As a divorcee who should be completely jaded by the idea of marriage, I just don't get people who never want to get spliced.

I know I'm making little sense, but I need food right now. Will maybe return after my brain is sugarred up :P[/quote]

Some friends of mine recently got out of nightmare marriages which has made them “anti-marriage”…its totally understandable.

Other's have re-married...it all depends on the individual.

Personally, I have nothing against marriage overall, however I have a serious issue with the way two people get together in our culture.[/quote]

I'm not anti-marriage. I'm anti a bloke sharing my space 😛 I'll happily marry him if he's willing to live across the street 😂

Aphrodite — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 10:31

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="Admin"][quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]girls who are unmarried are more likely to get harrassed then married women?

TYPICAL backwards thinking :roll: :roll:[/quote]

So you'd rather the married ones were more harrassed?

Both are bad, but unfortunately its reality.[/quote]

Did I say that? :roll:

NEITHER should be harrased

but never have I come across or even heard someone say that unmarried girls are more likely to be harrassed

most girls DONT discuss their marital status with guys

and other unmarraied girls if they know that the guy is dodgy just tell the guy that they're already married-even if they're not[/quote]

But with your last statement, you've just proved Eeyore and Admin's point sis - by stating they're married, even if they're not, they KNOW they're more likely to fend off the dodgy blokes as no guy is going to try and muscle in on a married woman. It's not right, no women should get hassled like that, but it's the way it is at the moment.

MuslimSister — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 10:56

Salaam

Personally, I think that if a guy has no shame…it wouldn’t matter to him if the girl was married or not.

A girl’s marital status shouldn’t be anyone’s business. It should not be up for discussion.

Such a topic should be avoided completely cos its way too personal. In real life, I totally avoid such questions.

One would think that being “married” is a big deterrence for others…but this is not always the case….for some it’s even more appealing. (i.e. Forbidden love, being taboo, the secrecy, linking up undercover etc etc)…all this adds to the excitement, which is why there are plenty of extra marital affairs going on.

Wasalaam

Aphrodite — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 14:23

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]if guys never tried it on with married women there'd be no such thing as "affairs"

whether a guy tries it on with a girl or not depends on two things

1-if the girl flirts back

2-how shamless the guy is[/quote]

I know married women who initiate the flirting sometimes, because they think it's 'cute' and then are horrified when guys respond likewise :roll:

MuslimSisLilSis — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 16:06

[quote="Aphrodite"]

I know married women who initiate the flirting sometimes, because they think it's 'cute' and then are horrified when guys respond likewise :roll:[/quote]

so guys DO respond

being married is not a deterrence for many people

so its wrong to claim that unmarried women are MORE likely to be hit on

esp since we live in a time when people dont care about these things

Aphrodite — Tue, 26 Jul 2005 - 17:02

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"][quote="Aphrodite"]

I know married women who initiate the flirting sometimes, because they think it's 'cute' and then are horrified when guys respond likewise :roll:[/quote]

so guys DO respond

being married is not a deterrence for many people

so its wrong to claim that unmarried women are MORE likely to be hit on

esp since we live in a time when people dont care about these things[/quote]

Responding to advances is a length away to initiating them. Who is more at fault? The married girl doing the flirting, or the unmarried guy acknowledging the attention?